


Into The Woods

by kasey8473



Series: Friends Found [4]
Category: Supernatural
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-10-02
Updated: 2012-11-29
Packaged: 2017-11-15 12:00:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 14
Words: 49,697
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/527084
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kasey8473/pseuds/kasey8473
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>AU: Dean and Sam take their families on a relaxing camping trip for the first annual Winchester family vacation. Not long after arriving, the angels show up on a team building exercise. Relaxing isn’t quite the word for the weekend from then on. 4th in the ‘Friends Found’ series.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> 'Into the Woods' is the fourth story in the 'Friends Found' series and is meant to be read after the first three. I recommend reading the other stories before this one.

The Guardian training program was going rather well Castiel reflected, studying the files and transcripts of the two most recently graduated candidates. The coursework for the program was extensive and, after weeding out the more frivolous offerings from Uzziel’s original idea, a curriculum had been decided upon and implemented. It was thorough and updated regularly, many of the courses taught by angels in Guardian positions.

He marked the two approved and moved on to the proposed list of further education courses. Modern technology, current sports, age-appropriate clothing trends, and vehicle trends topped that list. Abigael remarked constantly that all were necessary teachings. She’d acquired the latest iPad, iPod, iPhone, and other such things and had agreed to teach a course as long as it didn’t interfere with her duties. 

As the first guardian, she was in high demand and busy, especially as she was the guardian to the Winchester children. Her plate at present was as full as it could get. As young as Jack was, he had a knack for finding the sort of trouble that would give Dean a heart attack if he knew about it. The Winchester trait of going where angels feared to tread seemed to be genetic.

Uzziel came into the office and dropped into the chair across from the desk. “Castiel, our management team doesn’t socialize. I find it a terrible missed opportunity for bonding.”

Did they really need to? Looking up for a brief second, he recognized the gleam in Uzziel’s eyes and returned his attention to the papers. Perhaps if he didn’t comment, whatever ‘great’ idea Uzziel had this time would go away. That method had never worked for him in the past, yet Castiel retained hope that one day it would.

“What are the Winchesters doing these days?”

The sudden change in topic with no discussion on the previous one was suspicious. Uzziel adored discussing his ideas ad nauseam and appeared not to notice no one shared his enthusiasm, least of all Castiel. “Working, raising their children, and destroying the various forces of evil that are a scourge across the United States.” Glancing up for a moment, he added, “I believe Jo is also attempting to get Dean to eat vegetables on a regular basis.” Something every bit as challenging as some of their cases. He lowered his attention to the papers, crossed out one course, and jotted down changes.

“I mean besides the usual activities. Have they planned anything different?”

After a moment of hesitation, where he wondered if this would get him into trouble somehow, Castiel said, “Dean wishes to take the family camping. The whole family. He believes they need a relaxing vacation since Sean is now six months old and Jack is --”

“Camping,” Uzziel asked with a frown.

Castiel wasn’t sure Uzziel even knew what it was. “Tent camping to be precise. According to Dean, there is no other way to camp.” He gathered papers, stacked them, and glanced at his appointment calendar. His assistant, Mariel, had noted several appointments he had today and he was going to be late for the first if he didn’t leave now. He picked up his assessment notebook. “Uzziel, I have visitations to make.”

There were six relatively new Guardians to perform three month evaluations on, three that needed six month evaluations, and one year evaluation. Then he had a speech before the next semester of classes could began, a meeting with Balthazar to go over the latest testing results (provided Balthazar showed up this time), a meeting with first the head librarian, then the master scribe, and a beer date with Sam and Dean. 

The beer date was what Jo and Gwen had called ‘guy night’. Apparently, Jo, Gwen, Ellen, and Jody had a similar gathering another night of the week.

It had been a long road to get back to the point of having friendly get-togethers with them and he looked forward to these occasional evenings at their favorite bar in Sioux Falls. Sometimes Bobby joined them and Rufus too when he was in town. Castiel had yet to figure out why Rufus called him ‘flyboy’. He supposed it had something to do with him being an angel and having wings, but he’d decided it was better not to ask.

With age and experience did sometimes come wisdom.

Uzziel waved a distracted hand. “Sure, sure.”

At a last glance before he was out the door, Uzziel was still frowning and murmuring ‘camping’ in a thoughtful tone.

Oh well.

Nothing Castiel could do about Uzziel. He’d ceased to try to talk him out of his ideas and simply let him go about them. Matters usually worked out in the end. How much trouble could Uzziel get into researching camping anyway?

Castiel ignored the shiver of apprehension that swept down his spine and went about his busy day.

~~~~~~~~~~

“We’re taking a family camping trip.”

Jo’s reaction to Dean’s well-timed announcement was hardly what he’d expected: she made a mad dash into the kitchen and threw-up in the wastebasket. Dry-heaved, anyway.

“If you don’t like the idea, you can just say so,” he told her, leaning against the kitchen doorway.

She raised her head and grimaced. “You were the one who really wanted another baby. I could have gone another couple years without one.”

The two topics didn’t go together in any way, shape, or form, yet betrayed what had been on her mind. Jo was ten weeks pregnant with their second child. Her nausea was reaching record levels for her, surpassing how bad she’d had it with Jack, and she was regretting their decision during those moments when the nausea rose up. She was having to let everyone else do any cooking, as one whiff of cooking food had her heaving, and she carried saltines everywhere she went. It made eating out an interesting experience.

He felt a brush against his leg as their son, Jack, eased past him. 

“Are you okay, mommy? You want 7-up? I’ll get you 7-up. Daddy, will you take me to get some 7-up for mommy?” Jack looked up at Dean.

Jack was obsessed with 7-up despite the fact that he rarely had any and Jo didn’t keep it in the house.

“I’m fine, sweetie. Go back to the table.”

Turning, he returned to the other room.

Dean took a glass from the cupboard, filled it with water, and handed it to her. “It’s just a two-day camping trip. Three tops. Sam’s been monitoring the area for the past week and it looks like we’re good to go. There’s no activity within fifty miles that he’s found. We’ll drive down in the morning, get camp set up, spend two days relaxing, and come back Monday.”

“Dean, I don’t camp.” She took a mouthful of water, swished it around and spit it out in the sink, then ran water for a minute. “I hate camping. I see no fun in freezing in a tent, sleeping on the ground, eating food half-scorched over a fire, and trying to catch said food from a lake or stream or something. It’s not relaxing. My idea of camping is a cabin in the woods with running water and a toilet. You know, like the perfectly good cabin we already have? Gwen has anyway. It’s got all your requirements for outdoor stuff. Lake nearby, forest, things that try to get away from you when you try to catch them to eat….”

“The point of camping is to camp,” Gwen called from the table.

“Not in _my_ opinion,” Jo replied with a snort. “My idea of camping is with electricity and a working bathroom.”

Sam leaned back in his chair far enough to see into the kitchen. “Didn’t you and Ellen ever squat in some abandoned places while on cases?”

“With _my_ mother’s connections? Sam, she knows people in about every state. We slept in the car a few times, but I don’t recall squatting. We always had beds of some kind.”

“What about when you left the Roadhouse to be on your own?”

It was an innocent question Sam was asking, but Dean saw a darkening of Jo’s eyes before she moved closer to the cabinet and out of Sam’s line of sight. “Never did, Sam.”

Jo didn’t like to talk about the time after she’d left, rarely referencing it at all, though Dean knew there’d been a few times she’d gone hungry. In an attempt to lighten the mood, he moved behind her and put his hands on her shoulders, rubbing them just a little and bending to place a kiss beside her ear. “Think about this: looking up at the stars together, relaxing by the fire and water, spending time as one big family. It’ll be fun.”

She drank about half the water and replied, “Mosquitoes, ants, other bugs, weird critters and, in case you’ve forgotten, our son still screams at the sight of an ant. High-pitched, glass shattering screams.”

Spiders and snakes Jack had no fear of. He’d pick up those with his bare hands. He also had no problem with beetles, roaches, grasshoppers, dragonflies, or other insects. It was, oddly enough, ants that earned his panic. “We’ll work on that. Perfect time.”

“Okay.” She took another drink. “Who’ll feed the cat?”

A stray had shown up when Sean was about four months old and started gifting them with dead field mice, birds, rabbits, and squirrels. It was hard to describe how Dean had felt to have the cat trot up with a squirrel tail for him one morning. It had dropped the tail at his feet, then rubbed against his legs, purring loudly the whole while. Jo and Gwen had been feeding it and Jack had named it ‘kitty’. It was an affectionate cat, if a bit skittish, with the habit of sleeping on the Impala’s hood in the sun, jumping on Dean’s lap if he happened to sit down outside, and climbing up Sam to sit on his shoulder and lick his hair. 

Dean smiled. “It’s a stray, Jo. I think it can hunt for two days.”

She rolled her eyes as she faced him. “Fine. We’ll go camping. Peeing in the woods. Yay.”

He tugged her to him and wrapped his arms around her. Time hadn’t dulled his love for her. In fact, he could hardly believe they’d been together as long as they had. It only seemed months, when it was now years. “You’ll have fun. Trust me.”

“We need to get a butt load of paperwork done before we leave,” she warned. “No running off this time and disappearing. If you want to leave tomorrow morning, you have to help. We’re behind in invoices and I’m barely on top of the bills.”

It was no secret he hated the paperwork end of their private investigation business and would pawn it off on whoever he could. “Tell you what, I’ll work on Heather’s stuff. I haven’t heard her ask me if I’m witnessing to her in awhile. It’s sort of fun to wind her up.” He took every opportunity to tell Heather Holt, Jo’s former high school nemesis and a practicing witch, that she was headed for hell. Some day she might even believe him. She couldn’t seem to make the connections between her witchcraft, hell, and demons, though they’d all explained it to her.

An hour later, the dishes were done and they were sitting at the table upstairs working. He squinted at the top paper in the Heather Holt stack, slowly holding it first closer, then further away. The print didn’t get any clearer despite him wishing it would.

Jo picked up the reading glasses beside her and held them out. “Here.” She’d been trying to get him to go get his eyes checked and when he’d finally thought he’d refused enough, she’d bought a box of reading glasses at the dollar store and had been stashing them everywhere. She’d bring out a pair in a second and brandish them at him. 

No way was he ever going to admit that he used a pair when he was alone and knew damn well he needed glasses to read now. The tiny print on papers was just a little too tiny these days. “I don’t need those.”

“You’re squinting.”

“It’s bright in here.”

With a lift of her brows, Jo set the glasses down on the table beside her.

As they worked, Jack was busy as well. He dragged his little plastic drawing table out of his room and over to the table where they were working, then dragged his chair so he was sitting beside Dean. He carried over a pad of paper, two coloring books, and a plastic cup filled with crayons, then settled down. Gradually, Dean began to realize that Jack was holding up papers close to his face, then at arm’s length before sighing and scribbling on each page. 

He could guess where this was going.

“Whatcha doing there, little man,” Gwen asked, rocking Sean in her arms.

Jack looked up at her. “I’m daddy and I’m working. I’m doing Heather’s papers.”

Dean held out his hand. Jo set the glasses in them and he slid them on.

Sam snickered and slid a stack of papers across the table to him.

He pointed a finger at him. “Just wait. Your time’s coming. Genetics, man. Even dad had reading glasses.”

“I never noticed them.”

“He only wore them when he thought I couldn’t see him.”

“Kind of like you,” Jo remarked with an innocent smile.

Dean turned his attention to the papers and refused to dignify that with a response. 

~~~~~~~~~~

It wasn’t that Jo wouldn’t enjoy a family vacation. She was sure she would. It was just the whole camping thing that turned her off. Why camping of all things? What was Dean’s obsession with it? He’d spend hours in the sporting goods store drooling over the tents and camping paraphernalia. Not her idea of a fun afternoon. She thought he might have visions of passing on his camping wisdom to Jack as some sort of father-son bonding moment.

She worked her way through a stack of bills, writing checks for some and paying online for others.

Dean’s phone rang. He picked it up, grimaced and set it down. It stopped ringing only to begin again a moment later.

“You gonna answer that,” she asked.

“Nope.”

Curious, she picked it up, glanced at the number, didn’t recognize it, and answered it. “Dean’s phone.”

“Is that Jo?”

The voice was familiar and Jo put him on speakerphone, suddenly understanding why Dean hadn’t wanted to answer. “Hi, Garth. What do you need?” His calls were always a source of amusement and none of them could figure out how he’d remained alive since he wasn’t the most competent of hunters. Still, he was a hunter and a good contact and, as he always gave them a heads-up on jobs he wasn’t interested in, they tried to keep on good terms with him.

“Oh, Jo…. You flirtatious minx!” Somewhere along the line he’d gotten it into his head that Ellen, Jo, and even Gwen flirted with him every chance they got. Nothing they said convinced him otherwise. It was a mystery to them where he’d gotten that idea. “I’ve got a girl now, so you need to stop being all sexy.”

She knew about his new girlfriend and a ton of things about her that’d freak the woman out if she knew. It’d also freak out Sam and Dean to know who Garth had gotten himself entangled with, but so far, Jo had decided to keep that information to herself. “Not feeling too sexy anyway, what with the _morning sickness_ and all.”

“Crackers. Make sure you have crackers and one of my former lady loves ate banana instead. Said it worked every time.”

“Uh…thanks.”

“Don’t mention it, you playful feisty gal.”

“You need to talk to Dean?”

Dean shook his head and waved his hands in refusal.

“No, not really, I guess -- since you’re on the line. I was calling to tell him I found that object he was looking for. Got it in a nice box. Had it made to the exact specifications he sent me. Want me to FedEx it?”

“Hold on a sec.” She put it on mute. “One of Heather’s objects?”

“The one Sam tried to pick up when we were in Vegas last.”

The object had been already gone by the time Sam had gotten to the magic show. Somehow, Jo wasn’t surprised that Garth of all hunters would find it. She un-muted the phone. “No, why don’t you drop it off with Bobby? Wouldn’t want it to come open in transit.”

“Gotcha. I’ll call him about that.”

“Good chat, Garth.”

“You take care of yourself, Jo. Dean got lucky with you.”

“Obviously, since you’re knocked up again. Got lucky more than once, I’d say.” Gwen’s whisper had Sam stifling a chuckle and Dean covering a mouth with one hand and pretending like he wasn’t smothering a laugh.

Jo concluded the call as fast as she could. “You guys are terrible.”

Gwen grinned. “You love us anyway.”

“Good thing, too.”

She finished up the bills and went to pack for herself and for Jack.

~~~~~~~~~~

While he was sad that Jo wasn’t more excited about camping, Dean was determined to make it a good trip for her. After all, their attempts at vacations thus far had mostly been disasters. The first Las Vegas trip with the Trickster, the second one with the Supernatural convention. He really couldn’t count taking Ben back to Lisa a vacation in any way. Not exactly good times, though they’d had some good things happen during all of those.

This vacation was going to be a relaxing one if he had to throttle everyone to make it happen.

He added ice to the second cooler and mentally went through everything already packed in the vehicles. All that was left were their personal belongings and the last cooler.

Sam glanced up from his iPad. He’d been playing some game about plagues for the past couple weeks. “I just killed the world using a virus I named Meg on lethal level.”

Dean snorted. “It should probably frighten me how good you are at this game.”

“Gwen’s better at it. She got through all the levels on brutal in three days.” Gwen had also been the first one to play it. She’d downloaded it, mastered it, and passed it on to Sam. Once she’d mastered a game, she got bored with it. Dean had lost count of the number of games she’d bought and deleted. “Three days from _buying_ it. I don’t think she even tried the regular level.”

“Yeah, she’s sort of scary.”

Gwen emerged from Sean’s room with two big bags. “ _I’m_ scary? You ever look at yourself, Dean? You can be a damn scary dude when you want to be.”

Jack finished bumping down the steps on his rear and asked, “Daddy, what’s damn mean?”

He smiled, wondering at the timing Jack had. He seemed to always walk in during the worst part of conversations. “Ask Gwen.”

“Gwen, what’s --”

“Ask Sam, little man.”

“Sam --”

“Ask your mom.”

Jack sighed and called out, “Mommy? What’s damn mean?”

Jo zipped one bag on the table and gave Dean her best ‘annoyed mother’ look. She looked just like Ellen when she did that. “Ask your father, Jack.”

He sighed even longer and rolled his eyes. “ _Daddy_? What’s it mean?”

“I hate you all,” Dean murmured and crouched down, holding up a finger with a stern look. “It’s a word you don’t say. It’s a bad word.”

“Then why’d Gwen say it?”

“Because your cousin isn’t old enough to start repeating the things she says and she hasn’t had him yell out something embarrassing in a crowded restaurant yet.”

Jack scrunched his nose up, looking confused. “Huh?”

“She didn’t mean to,” he told him. “The word has a few meanings. But mostly it’s a curse and you know curses are bad.”

He stared at Dean, put a finger in his mouth and chewed on it a moment. “Oh. Can I have apple juice now?”

“Only if your mother says you can.” 

“Mommy?” He ran to Jo and tugged on her jeans leg. “Can I have apple juice?”

And the word was successfully forgotten by him before Dean had even finished explaining it. Amazing.

They packed the cars in record time and were on the road within the hour.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ‘Glory of Love’ is sung by Peter Cetera.

Uzziel fully realized that Castiel and the other angels merely tolerated his enthusiasm for various things. He had to admit that he could be a tad grating and over the top when he got into a topic, but he’d never considered just how much free time he’d have with the war finally over. His endeavors with the angelic university really didn’t take up much time and neither did his duties on the administration side of running heaven. After all, he’d delegated pretty much everything he could, a thing Castiel still hadn’t gotten the hang of. 

He had time and time was something angels had a ton of. Since idle hands were the devil’s tools, as the saying went (he’d found he loved learning things like that), he tried to keep busy. He attended classes, expanded his knowledge, and kept hoping that one day Castiel might bend and let him do Guardian stuff. Uzziel supposed that perhaps his fixation with Ellen was a deterrent…. He was completely in control of that now, however. Why, he hadn’t thought about her in maybe a day. Until now. What was she doing right now, he wondered. Was she fixing a meal or reading or driving? Doing one of any other hundred things she did on a daily basis?

With a guilty glance left and right, he reminded himself ‘I am a holy angel of the Lord’ until the urge to go see her disappeared.

He sighed. In a way, Uzziel sort of missed the war. He missed using his skills as an army leader and his angelic brain apparently wasn’t wired to understand human innuendo and jokes. Oh, he’d put on a good show occasionally, but that got tiring. He’d been very good at the whole ‘show’ part of his former job. Showing confidence when he wasn’t and that sort of thing. Working with Raphael had demanded it.

This, however, was a genius idea. Even his vessel agreed.

He looked over the list Jael had brought him and slipped down to earth, checking on a few things himself before returning to approve of the plan. The next thing to do was to corral both Castiel and Abigael. He felt confident he could convince them both.

A team building camping trip was exactly what they needed. He was certain the Winchesters wouldn’t mind the company.

~~~~~~~~~~

Jo’s expression was dazed when she stepped from the Impala. For that matter, so was Dean’s. Gwen let Sam go around to remove their son from the backseat and went to stand beside Jo as Dean unbuckled Jack from the car seat.

“What’s that look for,” Gwen asked.

She leaned against the car, hands in her jacket pockets. “Jack just spent an hour reciting The Cat in the Hat, The Cat in the Hat Comes Back, the lyrics to ‘Hells Bells’ and ‘Back in Black’, and two-thirds of the rite of exorcism -- in perfect, if slow Latin pronunciation. Back to back.”

Gwen stretched her back. “The Dr. Suess I get. The AC/DC I get, but who’s been reading him the rite of exorcism?” Gwen would read what Jack brought her and had assumed Sam did, too. Dean always read him silly books so he could make the funny faces and voices and Jo usually read Dr. Suess. Jack loved to be read to. It was one of his favorite things. He liked to climb up on a lap and ask for book after book to be read. He could drag out bedtime for hours if they’d let him. It was particularly amusing to watch him get Bobby to read to him. Maybe the rite was Bobby’s contribution to Jack’s education?

Sam appeared from behind the door, baby carrier in hand. Sean was awake and just beginning to fuss. Time for a change and a bottle. Gwen was glad she’d chosen to stop breast feeding -- an easy decision when half the time he’d refused to latch on. If she’d been breast feeding she would’ve had him feeding almost non-stop during the growth spurts. 

“Sorry, Jo,” Sam said with a contrite look.

“Sorry?” Her brows rose.

“Yeah. Dean said it didn’t matter what I read to him and the book was right there. He really seemed to like the Latin. Settled right down and listened.”

“You read it to him once?”

“No, four or five times and the last time, _he_ brought the book to _me_ and read it out loud with me.”

Jo blinked. “So he’s fast at memorization and might have an ear for languages?”

Dean and Jack went into the tree line and behind a clump of bushes. Gwen heard something about ‘pee’ and ‘big boy pants’. “Could be. That’s a good thing.”

Sam smiled. “On the bright side, he’ll already have the rite memorized for when he’s older.”

Jo’s nose scrunched up. “That’s not a bright side, Sam. Sort of implies he’ll run afoul of demons.”

“He’s a Winchester,” was his dry response as he laid out a blanket, a couple of plastic pads and began to change Sean. “We run afoul of everything.”

“He has a point,” Gwen told her, moving to begin taking things from the back of the SUV. Of course, it wasn’t just the Winchester side that ran afoul of demons. The Harvelle side had, too. For that matter, the Campbell and Bennett sides of this family had had their own troubles with demons.

“Not one I want to dwell on.”

“Understandable.”

As soon as Sam was done changing Sean, he left the baby with Jo and came over to help Gwen. He leaned down to her ear. “This should be an interesting weekend with Jo feeling like she has to ralph every time she smells food cooking. Dean’s got this big camping food menu planned.”

“With any luck she won’t have the nausea much longer and everything will sort of even out.” Gwen wasn’t expecting that to happen however. Sometimes morning sickness lasted all through the pregnancy. Jo had discussed it with Dr. Ames, but the doctor wasn’t worried, assuring Jo she was having a normal pregnancy.

He took a few items to one side of the camp and returned. “You’re sure you’re okay with this? I mean, Dean’s been wanting to go camping again for months and --”

“Sam, are you kidding?” She leaned against the SUV and slid an arm around his waist. “I love camping. I don’t mind. It’ll be fun.”

But as she watched Jo, she wasn’t so sure Jo was going to find it fun. Jo wasn’t exactly the camping sort of woman, as Jo had pointed out back at the house. Maybe Gwen should have pushed them to head for the cabin. They could have put up tents in the yard while Jo stayed in the cabin.

Too late now. Gwen shrugged and went back to unloading the SUV.

~~~~~~~~~~

While the drive hadn’t been too long, merely a few hours, the weekend stretched on ahead of Jo. She leaned against the car a moment, watching Sam change Sean, then glanced around the clearing. The day was sunny, the sky clear, and the weather not too warm or cool. It was, as Dean said, perfect for camping.

Too bad she hated camping. 

She opened the trunk and reached for her bag only to find it tugged from her hands.

“I’ll get that,” Dean told her.

She reached for the cooler.

He placed a hand on it. “I’ll get that, too.”

With glance at Sam and Gwen, who had already unloaded their own vehicle, then at the Impala, Jo crossed her arms. “So, what’s in the trunk that you don’t want me to see?”

“Nothing.” Dean smiled that flirtatious smile he always used when he tried to distract her from something. “I just think that you should take it easy and let me set up camp. After all, you’re sort of here under duress --”

“You bought a new fishing pole.”

“No, but I thought about it.”

“You bought a new tent, that super deluxe model you were drooling at in the sports store.”

“No, but I was tempted.”

What could it possibly be? “You’ve got a dead body smashed in there that you’re going to bury?”

“No, but there _is_ room for one. Maybe even two.”

She sighed. “Okay, fine. You can put the camp together and I won’t peek at the trunk.” Turning, she saw Jack sitting on the ground by Sean’s carrier, rocking it with a hand and watching Sam take a tent from it’s case.

Gwen grabbed the shovel and, since her suggestion made sense and Dean obviously wanted Jo oblivious as to what was in the trunk, she started down the path with her. As they walked, her phone began to chirp with text notifications. She was almost sorry she looked at them. 

It was Marissa, the annoying fan girl she couldn’t get rid of. It was somewhat her fault, she realized. She sort of felt sorry for her. While Marissa wasn’t quite as bad as Becky, she was just as annoying.

‘Bestie! Midnyt show here? In costume? Next fri?’

Jo’s reply was less than tactful and only halfway a lie. ‘Pregnant. Get car sick. Can’t drive distances.’

‘I’ll come 2 u then! My treat!’ A moment later, a second text came in. ‘AU idea. Jo preggers. How wld J &D react? Opinion?’

‘Ris, gotta go toss cookies’

‘K. Feel better!’

She’d figure out how to really answer her later.

~~~~~~~~~~

Since Gwen had something of an idea what Dean was up to, she approached Jo and slung an arm around her shoulders. “Come on. Let’s go find a place to dig the pee pit and let all the guys do the manual labor.”

“Digging is manual labor,” Sam called out.

“Never said _we_ were going to dig it,” she replied with a grin. “We’ll just find the spot. You can dig it later.”

“Not quite the equal division of labor we talked about, Gwen.”

“I’ll make it up to you later.”

“I’m holding you to that.”

They found a good spot not too far away, Gwen anchoring the shovel in the ground. Jo was busy with her phone, rolling her eyes and snorting at the messages that were coming in. As they started towards the water, Gwen cleared her throat.

“Care to be social?”

She glanced up. “Sorry. It’s Marissa.”

“What’s she want?”

They’d met Marissa during their last attempt at a vacation when Gwen had been pregnant with Sean. They’d walked right into a Supernatural convention by accident, though Gwen was beginning to suspect that nothing like that was ever an accident with them. There were too many weird coincidences in their lives. Marissa was a fan of Jo in the Supernatural books and considered Jo, who she thought was really named Beth, the best LARPer ever. She was constantly texting and leaving messages. Jo’s habit of taking days to get back to her didn’t deter her as she seemed to think Jo was her ‘bestie’.

“You know how ‘Route 666’ was delayed in opening?”

Gwen nodded. “Of course, I do. Dave invited you and Dean to join him and Rose for the premier.”

Dave was the actor portraying Dean in the movie. He’d taken a liking to Dean at the convention and, since Dean had given him advice on how to woo Rose, he’d even kept in touch. Dean had alternately wanted to go and refused to go, something about seeing himself not himself in bed with an old girlfriend in front of his wife. He’d ended up finally refusing the invitation, claiming that they had too many cases to leave town for even a day or two and promising Dave that they’d come out soon and visit.

“Yeah, well, she wanted me to drive across the state to go to the opening midnight show with her in costume. I told her I was pregnant and get car sick now.”

She sensed the typical Marissa response of overriding all objections coming. “And?”

“She offered to drive to pick me up and pay for everything.”

“Sounds like someone has a crush on you.”

“No, it’s more like she’s lonely. She really doesn’t have any close friends and her boyfriend broke up with her a couple months back.”

Bending, Gwen picked up a rock and skipped it across the water. “Don’t do it,” she warned.

“Do what?”

“A pity get-together.”

“I wouldn’t do that.” Her expression indicated she’d been thinking about just that.

“Wouldn’t you? Come on. I know you. You feel sorry for her and if you do that, you’ll regret it. You can’t drink, remember?” She skipped another rock. This one went further. When she’d been eight, Christian had taught her how to skip rocks, one good memory she had of him. “Why don’t you change numbers and lose her info? Problem solved. We do it all the time.”

“No, Dean and Sam do it all the time,” she corrected. “You, me, mom, and Bobby all tend to keep information and numbers in case we can use favors in the future.”

“Sure.” Jo was right. “But what can you get from Marissa?”

“I’m using her to keep my thumb on the pulse of the fandom.”

That actually wasn’t a bad idea. Marissa, while Jo-slanted in her information, did seem to know things about the fandom. “Hmm. Better than using Becky.” Gwen would prefer not to have anything to do with Becky ever again. It was bad enough that Chuck had forwarded a baby gift from her to Bobby, who’d passed it on to them. She’d sent them a hand-stitched quilt, a hideous teddy bear, and several onesies with cute sayings on them. Gwen had opened up the teddy bear and removed the stuffing looking for any cameras and the like, then washed the quilt and onesies in boiling water. Dean had said she wasn’t being extreme enough in her reaction to the gift and suggested washing everything in holy water, too.

Jo averted her eyes and pretended to be answering a text, except she wasn’t actually texting. She was pressing keys and backspacing, but never hitting send. Gwen recognized the movements as she’d used that tactic herself to delay responding.

“What? Tell me.”

She turned her phone off and put it away. Her innocent expression didn’t fool Gwen for one second. “Beautiful spot the guys picked for this, huh? Bet the fishing is really good.”

“Jo. Tell me now or I’ll get it out of you later.”

“Gwen, it’s nothing. I’ll keep my eye on all the fandom stuff. You guys just pretend it doesn’t exist.” She put her hands in her jacket pockets. “Oh, and Marissa started a Jo/Dean AU where Jo gets pregnant and she wants my opinion on how they’d both react.”

“What’d you tell her?”

“That I had to go throw-up.”

Gwen laughed.

~~~~~~~~~~

After awhile, Jo wondered if Gwen had been recruited to keep her occupied. She seemed to be thinking of task after task to be done outside of camp, like scouting out the best fishing spot nearby and the spots of poison ivy Jack was likely to find fascinating.

He would, too. He was a typical boy except for the whole ant thing. He’d pick up anything he found on the ground and still managed to get filthy within minutes of going outside to play. It was a talent.

Jo opened a plastic baggie and pulled out a cracker, nibbling at it. She wasn’t having any nausea right now and was actually starting to feel hungry. Gradually, she became aware of a noise nearby that wasn’t a sound of nature.

“What’s that sound?” Jo cocked her head and listened. It sounded like a motor of some kind.

“Not sure.” Gwen’s smirk was knowing, belying her claim of not knowing. “It’s coming from camp though.”

They stepped back into the camp to find the tents up, Sam laying a fire and Dean in one tent, the flap opened wide. He was kneeling in the entrance and when Jo got a look at what he was doing and what the noise was, she smiled. “Oh, honey, you didn’t have to.”

He’d brought an inflatable mattress and was trying to inflate it. The air pump he was using was what the noise was. Trying was the word, too, as Jack was rolling around on the half inflated mattress.

Jack grinned. “Faster, daddy!”

“It only goes so fast and if you bounce one more time you have to go help Sam.”

“Aww….” Jack laid down and was still, or as still as a toddler ever got when not sleeping. “Don’t wanna help Sam. There’s ants.”

Dean glanced back at Jo with a grin. “Anything for you, sweetheart.”

“Is this what you didn’t want me to see?”

“I wanted it to be a surprise.”

“Mommy, it bounces!” Jack scrambled off the mattress and to her, taking her hand. “Come try.”

“I’ll try it later, when it’s all done.”

The afternoon passed quickly. Once camp was established, they settled in. Dean dug the pee pit, as Gwen had called it, with Jack ‘helping’. His help extended to playing in the dirt and picking up bugs, then screaming and running to Jo when he saw ants. Gwen, Dean, and Sam did all the work, and while Jo didn’t mind not having to do camping stuff, she did mind the assumption that she was in such a delicate condition that all she could do was watch the kids.

“I can do something, guys,” she said, peeling Jack off her leg and picking him up. “I’m not helpless, you know.” 

He laid his head on her shoulder and murmured, “I love you, mommy. Can I have a snack?”

“Love you, too, sweetie, and it’s almost dinner time. Dean, I can pick up firewood or something like that.”

Dean went to the wash basin and began to wash his hands. “Nope. You didn’t want to come and since we overrode your objections and forced your participation, you, my beautiful wife, are exempt from actual camping jobs.”

She raised her brows in surprise and tried not to let her satisfied smirk show as she remarked, “Sweet.” Easiest way she’d ever gotten out of camping tasks. All she’d had to do was emphasize that she didn’t camp. Awesome.

“We voted on that and everything,” Gwen told her.

“When?”

“After you went to bed last night,” Sam replied, getting out a pan and looking through the food boxes.

“That’s sweet, guys, thanks.”

Jo and Dean took Jack for a walk down by the water while Gwen and Sam made dinner. After they were finished eating and the dishes were done, they settled down in chairs by the fire, talking softly. Jack crawled up on Jo’s lap and snuggled against her, falling quickly into a doze. He’d had a long, active day. She looked down at him. He was looking more like Dean every day and Jo knew he was going to be a heartbreaker when he was older.

Gwen bounced Sean lightly on her knee. He smiled and made happy noises.

A silence fell upon Sam and Dean and Jo knew something was up from the way they appeared to be carrying on a conversation with only grimaces, raised brows and pursed lips. She waited for whatever the two had planned. It could be anything.

Dean cleared his throat and got up from his chair.

Sam also stood with a long-suffering sigh. “Are we really doing this?”

“Shut up and get your gadget. We agreed.”

The gadget Dean referred to was a set of iPod speakers in a small hard case. Sam attached his iPod. After a moment, the ‘Glory of Love’ began to play. From the devilish twinkle in Dean’s eyes, Jo knew what was coming next. A duet.

She grinned. This was _so_ them.

Gwen turned Sean around to face them.

While Sam was somewhere in the vicinity of the right key to begin with, Dean was terribly off, crooning the lyrics in his adorably flat tone-deaf way. At least it wasn’t directly in her ear this time. As the song went on, Sam’s pitch varied between Dean and Peter Cetera, though mostly Dean as he was louder. They did some bad choreography and Gwen burst into laughter. 

“I’m always strong when you’re beside me.” Sam made strongman arms. 

“I have always needed you.” Dean pointed at Jo.

“I could never make it alone.”

Jo smothered her own giggles right up until Dean dropped to his knees, using a flashlight as a microphone. She couldn’t hold it in any longer.

“Like a knight in shining armor, from a long time ago --”

“Just in time I will save the day --” Sam dropped beside Dean and they spread their arms, singing in unison.

“Take you to my castle far away!”

Jack woke and covered his ears with both hands. “Daddy, stop! Too loud!”

They laughed and continued despite the protest.

“We did it all for love,” Dean crooned, with what Jo recognized as his sultry lounge lizard expression. He often used that expression when he was feeling frisky and silly at the same time.

Sam bent and kissed Sean on the forehead, then kissed Gwen. “I trust my humiliation has amused you?”

“Immensely,” Gwen assured him with a grin. “Hope you two didn’t scare away the fish for tomorrow.”

“They’ll be back. Let’s get Sean put to bed.”

Dean knelt, his hands resting on the sides of Jo’s thigh’s. “It’s that time for you too, Jack. Come on, buddy. Bedtime.” With a yawn, Jack leaned towards Dean to be picked up and Dean stood, the boy in his arms. “I’ll be back soon,” he told Jo.

She stretched her legs out and listened to the sounds of Dean putting Jack to bed and of Sam and Gwen talking softly as Sean made contented murmurs.

True to his word, he was back within fifteen minutes, pulling a chair close. Dean grasped her hand and pointed at the sky, then towards the lake. “What’d I tell you? Relaxing. Stars, fire, water, family. Tell me this isn’t fun?”

“It’s acceptable so far.”

“Acceptable?” Leaning over, he began pressing feather light kisses against her neck. “This better?”

“Getting there.”

“Next time, maybe we could come out, just the two of us….”

“Get a room,” Gwen remarked, coming out of the tent she, Sam, and Sean were using.

“We have a room. It’s just back at the house.” Dean sat back in his chair.

She got a water bottle from one cooler. “Sam and I are turning in. Sean doesn’t seem inclined to settle down unless Sam’s actually holding him tonight, so…goodnight.” She returned to the tent.

Dean released Jo’s hand and put his arm around her. “This is the perfect evening. Admit it.”

Jo decided she could relax and enjoy herself. After all, what could possibly happen? They were miles from any trouble (Sam had fanatically checked right up until the time they’d left), the weather was supposed to be beautiful, and Dean had everything planned out for them. “It _is_ perfect,” she told him, and leaned close, resting her head against his shoulder and watching the fire.


	3. Chapter 3

Dean woke to a painful foot in his groin and his son’s urgent whisper of, “Daddy, I gots to _pee_. Wake up!”

“Mm-hmm.” He removed Jack’s foot from that delicate area and waited for the pain to recede. 

“Daddy, come on!”

He gritted his teeth and slowly sat up, trying to breathe. “Okay. Don’t wake mommy.”

“Too late,” came Jo’s whisper back. “He climbed all over me to get to you. I offered, but he says I can’t take him. Has to be you.”

Jack bounced on the inflated mattress that seemed to be losing air with each bounce. “Hurry up, daddy! I gots to go bad!”

Dean pulled his boots on, but didn’t tie them, and grabbed his jacket. “Let’s go.”

Outside, he found the sky just beginning to lighten and knew Gwen would be up any time, if she wasn’t already. He shuffled along after Jack, trying to wake up and wondering if there was any way in hell Jack would let him go back to bed for awhile. From his chatter, it was apparent that wasn’t going to happen, and Dean resigned himself to being up at dawn. Maybe they could get to fishing a little sooner than he’d planned?

Returning to camp a few minutes later, he found Sam out of his tent and crouching before the fire. Sean was bundled up against the morning chill and was in his carrier, kicking his feet and looking all around. When he saw Dean, Sean smiled, his feet kicking faster.

Dean sat in the chair near the carrier and stretched his legs out, drawing his jacket around him a bit tighter and waiting for Sam to get the coffee ready. _This_ was a vacation and he was savoring every minute. He couldn’t wait for a relaxing morning fishing, then a campfire lunch followed by more fishing and perhaps a nature hike with Jo. It was good for them to be away from everything for awhile

~~~~~~~~~~

Sam woke to Gwen feeding Sean, her hair loose about her shoulders. “Morning.”

She smiled. “Hi. You slept right through his diaper explosion.”

“Sorry I missed that.” 

“You were really asleep this time, too.”

He’d found they both did the same sort of tactics Dean and Jo had with Jack’s smelly diapers, though they had yet to resort to rock-paper-scissors to decide who got the change job. “I was tired. Long day of driving, setting up camp, and humiliating myself in song.”

“Finish feeding him and dressing him while I take a walk?”

He unzipped his sleeping bag and sat up. “Sure. I’ll get coffee ready if you’re not back.” She was back to running every morning, or walking in this case.

As he emerged from the tent awhile later, ready to make coffee and read, Dean and Jack stumbled from their own tent and made a beeline for the pee pit.

Dean yawned wide and didn’t seem to notice Sam until he came back. “You getting coffee going?”

“That’s the plan.”

“You’re a good man.” He dropped into one chair. “I mentioned that lately?”

Jack returned to the tent and Sam heard his loud cry of, “Wake up, mommy! It’s morning! We go fishing today!”

What she responded to that joyous cry was inaudible. As soon as the coffee was ready, he handed Dean a cup and got himself one. “How’d you sleep?”

“Fine until my son stepped on my crotch a few minutes ago.”

“You like the mattress?” He was thinking he might get one for himself and Gwen for the next camping trip.

“It’s okay. Seems to have lost a little air during the night and by a little I mean most of the air. It’s about flat.”

“You could patch it.”

“It only has to last the weekend because you and I know damn well I’m never getting Jo camping again unless it’s her version of it.”

They clinked coffee cups. “We all know it.” Actually, Sam wouldn’t mind Jo’s version of camping. They could all go to the cabin and spend a week or so there. He recalled Ham saying something to Gwen once about good fishing in the lake that hadn’t been far from the property.

He sipped at his coffee. He and Gwen had gone back to the cabin a couple months earlier, sorting more belongings and donating items to charities. Gwen had found a battered women’s shelter and taken the bulk of Ronnie’s clothes there. Going back was still an emotional thing for her. Her vote for tent camping instead of using the cabin made sense to Sam. She wasn’t ready to stay in the house her grandparents had died in. While she hadn’t known them long, she’d grown attached to them. She might never be ready to actually stay there.

Sam finished his coffee and set the cup down, turning his thoughts to the present. The plan for the day was for Sam, Dean, and Gwen to take Jack and Sean fishing while leaving Jo to do whatever she wanted here at the camp. She could join them if she wanted, but Sam was pretty sure fishing wasn’t her thing either. She was being a good sport so far though.

Jo came from the tent. Her hair was tangled and she had a blanket wrapped around her. “For once, it’s morning and I’m not nauseated beyond belief.”

“Just wait until we start breakfast.” Dean sipped at his coffee. “It’ll come.”

“True.” She tossed the blanket back into the tent and headed down the path.

By the time Gwen returned, Dean had eggs and toast made. Jo still hadn’t had any nausea, but ate dry toast just in case. She wasn’t taking any chances. Sam helped himself to another slice of toast.

“So, when do we want to fish today?” He took a bite.

“Now!” Jack stopped rocking Sean’s carrier. “I wanna go now! Can we go now?”

“Someone’s excited,” Gwen observed. “I don’t have a problem with going now, but we need to do some clean-up first, okay, Jack?”

Sam helped Gwen with clean-up. He almost couldn’t wait to see what was inevitably going to go wrong here. After all, it wouldn’t be a Winchester vacation without one thing going wrong. He just hoped it wouldn’t be too much of a doozy.

~~~~~~~~~~

Gwen was in her element, keeping the fire going and making more coffee and cocoa for the thermoses. Jo let her go about it by herself, not moving to help her. Gwen was one of those people who _enjoyed_ camping and all the tasks associated with it. Not once did Jo remember ever enjoying it.

Sam angled one chair near the fire, then went into his and Gwen’s tent and brought out a blanket and paper sack. “Here, Jo.”

Taking the sack, she looked into it. “Books?”

“Dean, Gwen, and I are taking the boys fishing.”

“Ahh, yes. It’s all you guys have talked about the past hour. The big fishing expedition. You know your boy isn’t old enough to fish,” she pointed out. “He’s not even a year yet.”

“We’re taking him anyway.”

“Sure.”

“There’s a chair,” he pointed at it, “and here’s a blanket and reading material. Have a relaxing morning reading by the fire -- or sleeping in your tent.”

She blinked in surprise. “No one expects me to go with?”

“Nope.” Gwen set a thermos and mug on a camp table beside the chair. “Here’s some decaf tea. It’s that mint stuff. Should calm your stomach and if that doesn’t do it, there’s another box of crackers in the food boxes.”

Sam set the blanket on the chair. “If you don’t like the books, blame Dean. He’s the one went to the used bookstore and bought them.”

Jo smiled. “Oh, you guys…. I’ll gladly stay here and have a real vacation.”

“Keep feeding the fire, okay?”

“That I will do.”

With only herself at the campsite, Jo could almost pretend this _was_ a real vacation. The view on one side of the camp was lovely, the lake framed by green foliage. She slouched a little in the chair, the blanket tucked around her, and poured a cup of the tea. Gwen had made it nice and strong and she gave it an appreciative sniff before reaching for the bag of books to see what Dean had picked out.

There was a novel about a weather witch, two about a female zombie, one about shape shifters, a haunted house story, and a final book that caught her attention immediately from the first sentence of the back blurb.

Jo began to read, sipping at her tea.

Time passed.

“Well, hello campground neighbor!”

Deep in an engrossing plot that involved a murderous creature rampaging a small college town, Jo let out a startled gasp. She did what her first instinct was: she threw the book (the heaviest item in her immediate reach) at the intruder, who turned out to be the angel Uzziel.

He caught the book. He was in jeans, a thermal t-shirt, and red plaid flannel (all so new they looked crisp), and looked like a caricature of a lumberjack. “Interesting choice of a weapon, Jo.”

“You startled me,” she told him as he came close and handed the book back. “What are you doing here? I thought you were supposed to stay in heaven for your work.” Mainly, she’d come to find out, so he’d stay away from her mother. He had something of a weak spot for Ellen and needed reminding he was a holy angel of the Lord whenever he was around her. Castiel said it was a constant struggle for Uzziel and keeping him in heaven was the best way to deal with him.

“We’re on a team-building exercise.”

“A what?” She knew what one was as she’d said it herself as a joke when proposing a group outing, but why would angels need a team-building exercise?

“An exercise in trusting teammates and bonding with them. Did I not use the correct term? I thought I had it right this time.”

“No, you got it right. I just don’t see how angels need it.”

“Oh, Jo, after our previous behavior, you know, before the war, we need reminders of why we’re here. I _know_ you remember Zachariah.” He did a theatrical shudder at the name. 

Ahh, yes. Zachariah. The douche bag angel who’d tried to turn her and Ellen into weapons against Dean and Sam. He’d brought them back from the dead and messed with their minds. She was glad he’d died at Dean’s hands. Her only regret was that she hadn’t helped. “I do remember him.” She also remembered that Uzziel had been the angel who’d partially fixed her mind, then led Castiel to her so Dean and Sam would ultimately find her and her mind would be fully fixed. As comical as he was sometimes, Uzziel had been instrumental in her and Ellen being saved in the end. He was another angel who had a good heart. Heaven was now full of such angels. With Raphael’s defeat, the bad angels had been killed. “Unfortunately.”

“So you agree? We do need a team building exercise. Plus, it’s good for the lower levels to see management doing things together. It keeps them uplifted. When we get back, I plan to give a slideshow for each department on what we accomplished.”

“Slideshow. How…fun.” She could only imagine how that would turn out.

“It’s Jael’s job to put it together. This is going to be a fun weekend. You know, I had to practically and _literally_ twist Castiel’s arm to get him here.”

“Wait, Cas is here?”

“Yes. Of course he is. He’s management.”

This she had to see. “Who else? Lead on.” She got up. “Talk as you walk. I want to say hello.”

“Me, Castiel, my assistant Jael, Abigael, and Balthazar, though I’m not sure where Balthazar is.”

“Balthazar is management now?”

“Not technically, but I needed another yes vote for camping to counteract Castiel and Abigael’s no votes.”

“Oh.” 

“He said he was going hiking the second we arrived and hasn’t returned. To be honest, I think his disappearance has something to do with Atropos. He’s dating her, you know.”

No, she hadn’t. It hadn’t really been that long since they’d gotten back on good terms completely with both Abigael and Castiel. Abigael didn’t gossip unless asked specifically about something and Castiel didn’t seem to know _how_ to gossip. “Isn’t Atropos one of the Fates?”

“She is. The youngest.”

“She’s here, too? She’s camping?”

“Yes, but from what I understand, she’s on vacation. It’s not a work thing, so you’re all fine. Her sister, Lachesis, is pulling double duty for a week while Atropos…has a vacation.”

Popular vacation spot. Somehow she didn’t think it was a coincidence that they all showed up here. It was never a coincidence.

~~~~~~~~~~

Dean had barely gotten his chair set up when he heard Castiel’s voice from behind him.

“Hello, Dean.”

“We’re off the clock.” Turning, he found Abby standing there with him. “Hey, Abby.”

“Abby!” Having spied Abigael, Jack ran to her, raising his arms so she’d pick him up. She obliged him.

Sam glanced at Dean and stopped taking his own chair from it’s case. “What’s wrong, Castiel?”

“There’s nothing wrong.” Castiel’s expression indicated strongly that he was lying in some way.

“Liar.” Gwen crossed her arms. “You two rarely come around together anymore unless something is wrong. I’m starting to feel like we’re Batman --”

“--and you two are the commissioner,” Dean finished for her. “I’m Batman, Gwen. You’re Supergirl.”

“Who are Sam and Jo?”

“Not playing your stupid superhero name game.” Sam finished putting his chair back in the case the rest of the way and slung the strap across his shoulder. “Lay it on us, Castiel. What, uh, big evil do we have to go after now? Big boss demon escape hell? Werewolves running wild nearby? Fan girls on their way? Tell it to us gently. Did Becky find a way to track us?”

Fan girls? Becky? Dean wasn’t sure where Sam got that, yet from the glance he exchanged with Gwen, there was some sort of story there. Interesting. He’d have to get it out of them later.

“None. There’s no big evil, boss demon, werewolf, fan girl.” Castiel sighed. “Uzziel has brought us camping.”

“It’s a team building exercise.” Abigael shifted Jack in her arms. “You’re getting heavy, Jack. Are you having fun on this trip?”

Castiel’s proclamation actually had Dean speechless for about twenty seconds and he completely missed Jack‘s response to Abigael’s question. Camping? And angels? The two words didn’t exactly mix. “So you just _happened_ to decide to camp here at the same time we are, huh?”

Castiel put his hands in his pockets. “It was Uzziel’s idea. I was against it, as was Abigael, but Uzziel insisted we vote. Him, Jael, and Balthazar against me and Abigael. Funny how he insists Balthazar is management when he needs a vote to win. I see no need for a team building exercise. We are a team regardless of engaging in this exercise or not. It has no point other than --”

“To annoy you,” Gwen asked with a lift of her brows. Sean was twisting in her arms, leaning towards Sam. “Sam, you take him. You’re the one he wants right now.”

“It does annoy me and he’s well aware of the,” one of Castiel’s brows lifted, “buttons to push, I believe is the phrase.”

“Yet here you are.” Bending, Dean began to pack up his chair.

“Yes. We are here. I apologize in advance.”

Castiel was still wearing his usual suit and coat, but Abigael was in jeans and a sweatshirt. Dean wondered if anything would get Castiel to change clothes. Once the chair was in the bag, he slung the bag onto his shoulder. “Well, let’s go say hi to everyone and then we can come back and fish while you angels do your team building exercise in peace.” 

They began to walk along the path, following Abigael. She walked with Jack, holding his hand and talking to him in a quiet voice, leading them all around the Winchester camp and to the west.

Behind Dean and Castiel, Gwen and Sam walked, Sam carrying a suddenly fussy Sean.

“I should have known he was up to something when I mentioned camping and he had to think about it. I do apologize for this interruption.” Castiel slowed his pace a little.

“Can you quite apologizing?”

Castiel glanced at him. “No. I can’t apologize enough.”

He meant about everything, not just this. Dean could read it in that single glance and the weight to those words. “We’re even, Cas. We got it all worked out, remember?” Castiel had to look at the big picture and do things like work with Death and the Fates on a regular basis. There were always going to be things he and Dean didn’t see eye to eye on, sometimes big things. Dean accepted it now even if he still didn’t like it. He hated how Death had used and manipulated Castiel and probably would again some day.

“Yes, it’s all worked out…until the next thing that I can’t tell you. This, however, I _can_ share with you. We’re here camping and Abigael and I felt we should tell you before Uzziel popped in to your camp as a surprise. Is Jo with you?”

“She was at their campsite,” Abigael supplied over her shoulder. “She was fine when I checked.”

They tromped along the path for a few minutes, Dean thinking of all the different ways their appearance was going to disrupt the wonderful weekend he’d had planned for his family.

“She’s not there.” Sam pointed as they stepped into the angel’s camp. “She’s right here in the angel camp. Hi, Jo. Guess you didn’t get to read very long?”

“Long enough to be really startled when Uzziel showed up.”

“Hey there!” Uzziel grinned and waved an arm. “There’s the rest of the group.”

Jo was sitting in a chair much like how they’d left her only without the thermos, books and blanket. She smiled. “Cas…. Way to get in the camping spirit by not changing clothes.”

He stepped closer to her. “I saw no need to. Our clothes repair and clean themselves moments after becoming soiled in any way. It’s an angelic matter.”

As Dean walked into the camp, Jack pulled away from Abigael and stared at Uzziel.

Uzziel’s welcoming smile widened. “Hello young Winchester child. I’m pleased to make your acquaintance.”

Jack’s eyes grew wide and he screamed the same sort of scream he used when he saw an ant. “Daddy!” He ran to Dean and grabbed on to his leg.

“Hey, buddy what’s wrong?” Bending, Dean rubbed a hand on Jack’s back.

Looking at Uzziel, he screamed again.

“It’s just Uzziel. He’s an angel. You know, like Castiel and Abigael?”

Jack buried his face in Dean’s jeans leg.

“Okay. He’ll get used to you,” Dean said with an apologetic shrug of one shoulder as he stood. What about Uzziel had Jack scared?

“Like he’s gotten used to ants?” Gwen reached out and took Sean from Sam. “I recognized that scream.”

“I think we all did.” Jo wiggled a finger in one ear. “Somewhere near, glass has shattered.”

Yup. The weekend was definitely going to be in tatters now. Goodbye relaxation.


	4. Chapter 4

With Jack now hiding behind Sam and Gwen and looking around their legs at Uzziel, Dean observed the angel camp. He took it all in in a long, slow perusal. They had pretty much everything the Winchester camp had. Tents, fire, chairs, and coolers. 

He blinked, cocking his head a fraction. Why would they need coolers, he wondered. They didn’t eat. They didn’t need to. The bodies of their vessels were sustained supernaturally. Curious as to what angels would bring camping that required refrigeration of any kind, Dean stepped to one cooler and flipped it open. He studied the contents, not sure what he’d expected. A science experiment of some kind, maybe? He supposed this could sort of qualify if they’d done it intentionally and glanced over his shoulder. “Um…. Jael?”

“Yes, Dean?” 

“Talk to you a minute?”

Jael walked over to join him. “Yes?”

He held up a finger and pointed it first at him, “In your extensive research for Uzziel on camping food, did anything happen to mention,” then down at the cooler, “the proper refrigeration methods?”

“He didn’t do all the research,” Uzziel told him. “I assigned myself the task of learning about tents. Did you know that the first --”

“You don’t sleep.” Sam raised Sean to his shoulder in an attempt to quiet him and after about five pats to his back, the baby let out a belch that had even Dean raising his brows. “Why do you need tents?”

“We’re going to pretend to sleep.” Uzziel was insistent on that, moving to open the flap of one tent to show them the sleeping bags inside. “We need the entire experience, not simply the appearance of experience. We’ll learn together and return to heaven all the stronger as a team.”

At Jael’s continued blank look in the direction of the cooler, Jo got up from her chair and stepped over to join them. She leaned down to look, gagged, and stood back up. “You didn’t ice it? Oh geez. Don’t eat any of this. You’ll give your vessels food poisoning. Just what we need. Angelic vessels puking their guts out.” She coughed and reached into her jacket. “And now I need crackers to settle my stomach.”

“We wouldn’t get sick and neither would they because of us.” Castiel walked over and closed the cooler, then bent and picked it up. “I’ll be right back.” When he returned, the cooler was refilled with fresh food and ice had been added. “Is this satisfactory, Dean?”

Crouching down, he picked through the food packages. It looked like Castiel may have just copied what Sam and Gwen had packed in their coolers back at camp. “Sure, but why do angels need food? You guys don’t eat.” He closed the cooler and stood, dusting off his hands.

“We don’t usually, but we can.” Abigael opened a tube of Pringles potato chips she’d taken from a plastic box. “Salt and vinegar chip?” She ate one and held the tube out. “I’ve found them to be quite tasty actually. My vessel really likes them.”

Dean reached in the tube and took a few chips since she was offering. Pringles weren’t exactly real potato chips, more like potato flavoring and flour shaped like chips, but they were free so he wasn’t going to complain. As he munched on them, Jack sprinted to him and hid behind his legs again. “You okay down there, Jack?”

“Yup. Can I have a chip, too, daddy?” 

He handed him one. Jack hadn’t screamed since the first couple of screams and now Dean wondered if he was working through some imaginary scenario in his little head. Jack did have a pretty good imagination. Maybe he’d seen an ant on Uzziel’s clothes?

“It’s all part of the camping experience,” Uzziel said with an even bigger smile. “I, for one, am looking forward to a hotdog and a marshmallow chocolate graham cracker sandwich.”

“A s’more,” Jo corrected, returning to her chair and sitting. “It’s called a s’more and graham crackers sound really good right now. Better than saltines.” She tucked her hair behind her ears. “You have any extra?”

“Whatever it’s called, I look forward to it.” He opened the plastic box, brought out a package of graham crackers and took it to her.

Jo opened the box, then the inside package, and crossed her legs. Jack eased from behind Dean’s legs to Gwen’s and Sam’s, then over to crouch at the base of the chair. He peeked at Uzziel from around Jo’s knee, head bobbing up and down.

Sam cleared his throat. “Why camping though? I wouldn’t think it’d be anything close to ideal for you guys.” 

Gwen nodded. “He’s right. Surely there were other things you could have done? Why not something like a cruise or Las Vegas? You could have gone to Hawaii.”

“I would have gone to Hawaii if Uzziel had suggested it,” Abigael commented. “I like Hawaii.” She closed the Pringles container and put it away.

Castiel crossed his arms. “You have a charge in Hawaii. You go there all the time.”

“Well, sure. I’d still go.” 

Jo put a hand on top of Jack’s head. “Up or down, sweetie? You’re making mommy seasick with the bobbing.”

“Up!” He took a graham cracker from the package, grinned at her, and sat down. “Down!”

“You go to Hawaii?” A thought occurred to Dean. “Maybe Jo and I could hop aboard angel air next time you go? Leave us there a couple days and come back for us?”

Sam shook his head. “Reliance on angel powers anyone?”

He spread his arms. “As long as she’s already going, it’d be nothing to take us with. Not like I’m asking her to make a special trip.”

“But she’d have to pick you up and bring you back home, thereby making a special trip.”

Abigael’s smile was amused. “I’ll consider the request, Dean.”

Uzziel sat in one chair. “Camping is a vacation tradition. Being one with nature.”

“The road trip is also a classic vacation tradition, Uzziel.” Sam sat as well and rested Sean on one knee, gently bouncing him. The huge belch must have made Sean feel better, for he began laughing. “You could have done one of those.”

Gwen settled on the ground beside his chair and snickered. “Yeah, bunch of angels in a minivan? That’d go well. I can picture it now: Uzziel driving because it’s his newest skill, Jael reading the map or trying to figure out a GPS, Abigael telling Uzziel to just stop and ask for directions already and if he won’t she will, Castiel staring out the window refusing to participate because angels don’t drive or take road trips, and Balthazar asking if they’re there yet over and over because he knows it’ll annoy the piss out of everyone.”

Castiel’s lips twitched at what Dean thought was a rather accurate description of what would occur on an angelic road trip if Uzziel planned it. “You have a fertile imagination, Gwen.”

“Tell me none of that would be truth.”

“You may have made an accurate assessment of our personalities.” He went to stand in front of Sam. “May I take Sean for awhile?”

“Sure. Here.” He handed Sean to Castiel and sat back with a satisfied grin. “He might need a change….”

Castiel frowned and sniffed the air. His expression shifted from surprise, to disgust, and finally to resignation. “Let me guess. The last one holding the baby changes the baby?”

“Hey, you’re the one wanted to hold him.” Sam and Gwen high-fived each other.

With a long look at both of them, Castiel nodded. “Very well. I’ll return in a moment.”

The idea of Castiel changing a messy diaper boggled Dean’s mind, but he was a fraction to late to ask Cas to take him with him so he could see it with his own eyes.

~~~~~~~~~~

Changing Sean wasn’t the first time Castiel had ever changed a diaper. He’d changed Jack a few times when Jack was a baby that Dean didn’t know about. It was one of those skills he’d practiced once upon a time and long before their temporary recent estrangement.

He finished the task, then placed Sean in the carrier and checked the Winchester camp. The fire was contained and he was glad Uzziel had thought to do so before he’d led Jo off to the angel camp. Uzziel _was_ showing good sense with this trip. It was simply his enthusiasm that was already getting on Castiel’s nerves. 

Actually, Castiel didn’t completely mind the camping trip. Overall, it was a good idea and he did agree that it was good for the rest of heaven to see them going on trips together as a unit. It presented them to heaven as a strong group that was able to work through challenges. The part he minded was Uzziel planning it for the one weekend this quarter that both Castiel and Abigael had plans for each hour of each day. They’d had a ton of meetings to reschedule and Mariel was likely still trying to get the weekend sorted out for both of them, although there were a couple things that couldn’t be put off. He’d just have to deal with them when the time came.

Spying a paper sack by one chair, he picked it up and glanced inside it. Books. Castiel liked books. With a glance left and right, he crouched down and looked at them, deciding that they had to be Jo’s based on what he knew of her reading preferences. One book was on the chair, the corner of a page turned down. He opened to the beginning and read the first few pages. Perhaps he’d borrow the book when she was finished with it. Castiel let a small smile slip free. Humans had the most creative minds!

A breeze swept the camp and he caught a scent on it that made him stand and concentrate on the immediate area. There was something…. Striding to Sam and Gwen’s tent, he found the baby backpack and strapped Sean in it against his chest. He headed towards the water, gaze raising to the sky. It wasn’t the Host he was sensing, but there was something. Something he wasn’t sure of and something that hadn’t been there when they’d all arrived.

Castiel slipped back to the camp and spoke to Abigael in a voice too low for the humans to hear. “Do a tour of the area. Try not to alarm anyone. There’s something here.”

“What?”

“I don’t know. See if you can get a feel for it. If you can’t, I’ll speak to Uzziel.” He’d hate to have to send the Winchester family home, since he knew Dean had been enjoying the weekend, but would if there was danger they couldn’t easily be protected from. Mentally, he began to prepare himself for the fight he knew they’d give him over it. Even if he were to authorize them to be physically removed and whisked back home, they were fully capable of driving back.

“Okay.” She was gone for less than two seconds. “I don’t see anything, but you’re right. There’s a presence.”

“The veil?” In various areas around the earth, there were places where the veil between this world and the fairy world were thin enough that things crossed over to make mischief with humans. Unfortunately, it did happen. It had come to light that those places were supposed to be guarded by the Host and for a long time, hadn’t been. The war had left openings and the location of a few of the crossing points had been lost. Castiel had them under guard now and if this was one, he’d go assign a guard right now. “Could this be one of the lost crossing points?”

“Doesn’t feel like it.” She shook her head. “I go by one such spot to reach one of my charges and it doesn’t have that feel. It is odd, however. I can’t place it.”

“Neither can I. We should inform Uzziel and Jael and keep an eye on the Winchester camp until they go home.”

“Agreed.”

“I’ll speak to Uzziel.” He approached him and crouched down. “Uzziel, I need --”

Time slowed to a crawl and Uzziel sat up in the chair. “What’s wrong?”

“How could you tell?”

“I know you, Castiel. Your expression. Too tiny a difference for the humans to notice, but not for any of us. What’s wrong?” He was instantly alert and ready for anything. “Tell me.”

“I’m not certain anything is. However, there is a strange…feel… to the area. We don’t think it’s a weak spot in the veil, but it’s something. Care to check around? You may have run across it before somewhere else.”

He was gone and back as fast as Abigael. “Strange. You’re right. It’s not the veil, though I agree it needs watching. What action should we take do you think?”

“We watch over the Winchester family, make certain their trip is uneventful.”

“Done.”

“Abigael, be ready to take the children away the second there is trouble.”

She nodded. “I always am. Should we talk to them about it?”

He considered it, then discarded the idea. “Not yet. We have nothing concrete to tell them, merely a feeling.” Dean did talk about gut feelings, however. He did believe in the validity of them. “We wait. Be vigilant.”

Time returned to the proper speed.

Sam was holding a cup. “Cas, I see you found the backpack.”

“If you don’t mind, I’ll carry him awhile.”

“Knock yourself out.” Gwen had Jack pulled down onto her lap. “He likes you.”

He kept a watch, opening himself up to hear any calls from heaven or other chatter that may be present. There were only the usual things. Castiel looked down at Sean and put his arms around the baby.

It was only a matter of time before whatever was out there showed itself somehow. Too bad he didn’t think he could convince Dean to abandon this trip before it did.

~~~~~~~~~~

Jo was groaning, head in her hands, sitting as far from the cooking food as possible. Abigael stretched her legs out. She was sorry they’d interrupted them while they’d been on their way to fish, but Dean, Sam, and Gwen assured her it wasn’t any big deal. As long as they fished once on the trip, they’d be fine.

In the walk to the Winchester camp, Uzziel had managed to convince Dean that he needed a cooking lesson and only the best grill master in the camp would do. Sam had rolled his eyes and scoffed at that, but let Dean take on teaching Uzziel how to make hamburgers for lunch. Uzziel was actually paying attention, too. Abigael realized they’d have a cookout in heaven one of these days so Uzziel could show off his latest skill. He really did like to share his newest knowledge or skill with anyone who’d stand still long enough.

Jack was growing bolder the longer they were there and no longer seemed afraid of Uzziel.

He edged towards Jael. “Who’re you,” he asked.

“You can call me ‘Jay’.”

His nod was solemn. “Jay.”

“Watch the fire,” Dean warned, deftly flipping burgers. “Sit down, Jack.”

“Okay, daddy.” He dragged his little chair beside Jael’s and dropped into it.

Dean put one burger in a bun and on a plate and held it out to Jo. “Want one?”

She looked up, gulped, and got up in a hurry, heading straight for the bushes.

“Mommy’s sick,” Jack confided to Jael.

“Oh?”

“Her tummy has a baby.”

“Ahh.”

“It’s a sister.”

Jael sent a questioning look Abigael’s way, but she couldn’t confirm it because Jo and Dean didn’t want to know. This time, they were both willing to wait to find out, though Jack was right. Jo was having a girl.

“We don’t know that, Jack.” Dean handed the plate across to Sam.

Jack nodded. “It’s a sister,” he repeated.

“How do you know?” Jael leaned towards him a little.

“Don’t want a brother.” He rolled his eyes like the question had been stupid.

With a small smile, Dean fished a package of crackers from the bag beside him. “Take these over to mommy.”

It was endearing to watch the boy approach Jo, hand her the crackers and hug her, then hurry back. Abigael was reminded right then of how much she had grown to care about this family.

“Why don’t you want a brother,” Jael inquired after Jack was back in his chair.

“I have Sean.”

“But Sean’s not your brother. He’s your cousin.”

“Close enough.”

Over at the fire, Dean snickered, then handed Uzziel the spatula so he could turn a burger. “You know, I think I remember Ellen saying something a long time ago about you implementing cooking classes at Heaven U, Uzziel. Cas mentioned it, too. Yeah, he said it made no sense for angels to cook because you all don’t eat. So --”

Busted, Abigael thought, but without batting an eye, Uzziel replied, “We hadn’t gotten to grilling yet. I’m going to make it a priority upon our return and the Guardians do eat on occasion, Dean. They keep up appearances when they’re in social settings. Like Castiel joining you and Sam for a beer every now and then.”

Dean’s mouth opened, closed, opened again, and he took back the spatula. “Give me that back. You’re turning them wrong.”

Uzziel raised his glance to Sam. “How do you turn a burger wrong?”

Sam chuckled and continued to eat his burger.

Slowly, Abigael got up and approached Jo. She crouched down and stretched out a hand to touch Jo’s back, making a discreet check of Jo and the baby to make sure they were okay. The nausea was worrying Jo. If Abigael could set her mind at ease, she would. “You’re okay,” she told her, sending a healing blast through Jo’s body. The nausea would be lessened for several hours now.

“Am I?” Jo glanced at her.

“Yes. You both are. Your pregnancy is normal. You can stop worrying.”

“I’ve felt so sick lately….”

“I know, but there’s nothing wrong.”

Jo blew out a long, steady breath, relief in her eyes. “Thanks, Abby.”

“You’re welcome.” She returned to her chair beside Castiel.

Jack kicked his feet. “We’re going fishing today.”

“Oh,” Jael said as though interested.

“You’re going with us.”

“I am?”

“Yup. Yup, yup, yup.”

“Why?”

“I want you to.”

Jael looked at Abigael, then Castiel, and finally Uzziel. “I guess I’m going fishing.”

Slowly, Uzziel’s lower lip pushed out in a pout. “I want to fish, too. I’m going as well.” He accepted the plate Dean handed him.

Castiel rolled his eyes. “ _That_ won’t end badly,” he murmured.

Abigael placed a discreet, hard kick to his ankle, though she was thinking the exact same thing. “Cas.”

“What?” He leaned closer, voice lowering. “Tell me you didn’t immediately imagine five hundred forty six ways it could be a disaster.”

“Five hundred fifty two,” she admitted, “but at least Balthazar can’t make it worse.”

“Where is Balty,” Dean asked, looking up from his cooking. “I thought he’d be hanging around with the rest of you.”

Uzziel cleared his throat. He’d added all the toppings to his burger, just like Sam had. “He announced he wanted to go for a hike, that the woods were beautiful, the lake absolutely divine, and there was honey for the taking.”

“He went to see his girlfriend,” Castiel explained. “She set up camp that way.” He gestured down the trail opposite where the angel and Winchester camps were.

“Balthazar has a girlfriend?” Sam exchanged an amused glance with Gwen.

“She have a name?” Gwen picked up her cup of coffee.

“Atropos,” Abigael supplied. “Her name is Atropos.”

“You mean like the Fate?” Dean flipped the last burger.

“Not _like_ the Fate, _the_ Fate. He’s dating the youngest Fate.” Jael adjusted his glasses. “He gets all the hotties. Not sure how, either.”

“Well, he does like living dangerously.” Jo returned, easing slowly back into her chair.

“All I can say is he’d better not show her his sword.” Uzziel frowned. “Or let her touch it.”

Gwen spit out a mouthful of coffee. “Sorry?”

“I mean it.” Uzziel raised his burger with both hands and contemplated it. “An angel’s sword being handled by a Fate? Something could happen.”

Everyone, save Jack, baby Sean, and Uzziel fought amusement and lost. Even Castiel, who commented, “I’m certain things are happening at the moment, not necessarily with his…uh… _sword_ involved.”

Uzziel’s frown grew deeper, yet Abigael saw the spark of pleasure in his eyes from having made them laugh. She suspected he was pleased because he’d gotten the innuendo correct this time. “Why are you all laughing?” He leaned over Jael to Jack. “Why are they laughing?”

Abigael could see Dean, Sam, Jo, and Gwen all looking at each other like they couldn’t believe he was that naïve. He wasn’t really. She knew he wasn’t. He’d been studying humanity since the war had ended, taking the courses as they were finalized. Uzziel had taken each course at least once by her count and passed them all. He’d gotten better at innuendo and sarcasm, though he still wasn’t anywhere near a master at either.

Jack shrugged, as if the ways of grownups were beyond him. “I don’t know.”

When the laughter died down, Dean looked at Castiel. “You were like that once.”

“I grew out of it.” Castiel adjusted Sean’s hat. He made no comment about Uzziel’s apparent naivety.

“I kind of miss you being all clueless like that, but you’ve still got a touch of it now and then.”

“I don’t. I’m wiser these days.”

“Like that time I took you to that whorehouse and you --”

“Dean. There are children present.” Castiel shifted uncomfortably in his chair. “Ellen has repeatedly told you to watch your mouth. Little pitchers --”

“Have big ears,” Jo supplied for him. “I’ve gotten that lecture a few times, too. After all, I did teach Jack his first swear word. Sort of. Anyway…. What whorehouse?” She was obviously feeling better, her expression no longer one of misery. “I don’t think I’ve heard this story.”

“Mommy, what’s a whorehouse?” Jack leaned forward. Out of all the words he’d heard, he picked up on that one.

“It’s a place where lonely men go so they’re not lonely anymore,” she replied.

Abigael thought Jo was pretty good at explaining things to Jack without the adult aspect added.

“For an hour or so anyway,” Gwen supplied under her breath.

“We should discuss this later.” Sam got up. “I’m going to heat a bottle for Sean. We’ll feed him, those who want some can have dessert, and we’ll get started fishing.”

Dean held up a hand. “I’ll take that dessert.”

Jo got up from her chair. “Give me a minute and I’ll have it up.”

With a contented sigh, Abigael watched Uzziel eat the burger and continued to monitor the immediate area for changes. So far, there was nothing new from earlier. Perhaps she’d slip away in a bit and do a more thorough search.


	5. Chapter 5

While firmly suspecting Uzziel of lying about grilling, Dean couldn’t quite catch him in it, so he abandoned his efforts and concentrated on finishing lunch. He was getting antsy for some fishing time and the sooner they were done eating, the faster they could get fishing. What were the chances that this was as weird as the weekend would be?

He cast a lingering glance at the angels. Low chance, he decided. The chance for something even weirder was high just by them being around.

Jo sighed, an overly loud sound, and rifled through the food containers. “What happened to all the M&Ms, Dean?” Her tone indicated that she already knew the answer to that question.

Dean glanced at Jo and finished adding ketchup to the last burger. “I had a couple handfuls earlier.” 

“Yeah. A couple handfuls in each _bowl_ you had,” Gwen replied, trying to coax Sean into taking his bottle.

“I didn’t eat all of them,” Dean protested with a tiny guilty twinge of his conscience. Maybe he had eaten most of the bag by himself. It was just so easy to eat a handful and another handful and another….

“That’s technically right. You left three single M&Ms in the bag.” Jo tipped them out into her palm and handed them to Jack. “Here, sweetie. You can have a s’more later, okay? Eat them all before you leave camp and stay with Abigael. Don’t wander off.”

Jack popped the treat in his mouth and announced he was ready to go. The two started down the path towards the water. Abigael would keep him out of trouble.

“If we need M&Ms so much, I’ll go buy more.” Dean stood, ready to go if she really wanted him to.

Jo shrugged a shoulder. “Send one of the angels.”

He saw Uzziel perk up at that suggestion. The danger with letting him go would be that he might get distracted by himself and somehow end up back at Bobby’s house pestering Ellen.

“Aren’t we still trying to minimize how often we use their powers? I’d swear we covered this earlier with the whole Hawaii discussion.” Sam reached out his hands. “Here, Gwen, let me try.”

She handed Sean to him.

“We use them in emergencies. Besides, have you seen the price of gas lately?” Jo put the trash away.

“I don’t think an M&M run constitutes an emergency,” Sam told Jo, “and yes, I’ve seen the price of gas. Our SUV uses just as much as the Impala. I think we average about fourteen miles a gallon with it. If that.”

“If I’m PMS-ing and want chocolate it’s an emergency,” Gwen replied. She looked relaxed and happy. “Although my indulgence tends to run to peanut butter cups and Snickers bars more than M&Ms.”

“Are you,” Dean asked, not that he particularly wanted to know.

“No, but that does constitute an emergency.”

“Got that right,” Sam muttered, shifting Sean and jiggling the bottle. “I keep emergency chocolate on me at all times.”

“You’re such a good husband.” Gwen smiled at him.

“I try.”

Dean made a retching noise, then pointed at them. “You two? Totally sickening sweet sometimes.” It was a good sight and sound though. Sam had had too much pain in love for so long that they’d assumed for awhile that he’d never be able to settle down. That Sam had Gwen at all was like a miracle in many ways. Sean was a miracle, too, because Sam had sworn more than once that he’d never have kids. Dean was glad that had changed. Sam was a good dad and was obviously enjoying being one. His face seemed to light up whenever he held Sean and a peace came over him.

“Like you and Jo aren’t?” Sam frowned. “Come on, Sean. Eat.”

“Name one time when we were sickeningly sweet.” Dean quickly went on before Sam could say anything. “See? Can’t do it.”

Sam’s jiggling of the bottle managed to produce a belch, at which Sean began to suck at the bottle. “There we go,” Sam said with a tiny smile. “I could name plenty of times, Dean. Like the time Jo was talking about wanting a Dilly bar on the phone and that there were no Dairy Queens close. You packed a cooler and drove five hours to take her Dilly bars.”

“You’ve got the gassiest kid in both ways,” Dean observed. He’d thought Jack a prodigy at belching, yet Sean gave him a run for his money. “Like father like son, and she needed help on that case.”

“No I didn’t,” Jo denied, crossing her arms. “That was the time my car wouldn’t start.”

“No, you needed help.” He remembered very clearly that she’d needed help.

“No, my piece of crap car wouldn’t start. Remember? You told me to jack a new one and one that didn’t have duct tape holding it together. I told you I actually owned the car and paid for it with my hard earned money and you laughed. You laughed at my piece of crap car.”

He could swear he was right. “I’m not remembering that. I’m remembering the Dilly bars….”

“You would. You watched me eat them with your mouth hanging open. Perv.” Her smile was a fond one.

Reaching out, he cupped her hip and tugged her to him. “You like it when I perv.”

“I do.”

“You deliberately ate them in a provocative way.”

“Maybe.” She shrugged one brow up and down.

“Speaking of sickening sweet,” Sam called out. “Case in point and Jo’s right, Dean. It was her car that time. The case was about a week later.”

“How do you two remember things like that?” He snapped his fingers. “It’s that whole female thing, isn’t it. You’re too in touch with your feminine side, Sam.”

Jo spread her hands across Dean’s chest. “Okay, well, back to the topic. If we have no M&M’s, the only dessert we have left are the s’mores and those are for later. No one gets dessert.”

“I’m okay with that.” Gwen glanced up at Castiel, who stood behind her with the baby backpack still strapped to him. He hadn’t removed it after handing Sean to her to be fed. “You want Sean back when he’s done eating?”

“I’d like that. Thank you, Gwen.”

“Fine with me and I don’t need dessert.” Sam looked over at Dean again. “I know you’re antsy. You could go set up the chairs and start getting ready. We’ll be down in five or ten minutes.”

“I’ll be fishing in five.” Dean picked up his chair and found Uzziel and Jael there to help carry the rest. As they walked to the spot he, Sam, and Gwen had picked out earlier, he asked, “So you two really want to fish?”

“Most definitely.” Uzziel grinned. “I’m ready to be taught. I always look forward to learning new skills.”

“Uh-huh. How about you, Jael?”

He adjusted his glasses. “I’m willing to attempt to fish, but this is your camping trip, Dean. I won’t intrude long on your fishing.”

“Not even if Jack wants you to?”

“Um….”

As the angel floundered on how to answer, Dean chuckled. “Don’t worry. I predict Jack has completely forgotten he told you you were joining us and that he’ll be bored within five minutes at most.”

It actually took twenty minutes to get the chairs set up, teach Uzziel and Jael the basics, and corral Jack so he could try too. Everyone except Jo was present. Castiel assured him she was set up in the camp and back reading by the time he’d left to come down to the water.

Dean settled back in his chair and let himself relax. The sun felt good on his face and he tipped his head back a little.

“What now, Daddy?” Jack kicked his feet back and forth. His smaller fishing pole was held like Dean’s and it warmed Dean’s heart to see his son trying hard to imitate him. This right here was the good part of their lives.

“You sit back, close your eyes, and wait for a nibble on the line.” He ignored Gwen’s super soft snort from his other side. She’d chosen to fish while Sam kept an eye on the cooler and pretended he wasn’t going to be napping in his chair in-between Uzziel and Jael’s inept tries at fishing. Neither one of the angels had fishing in his skill set.

About fifteen seconds after Dean closed his eyes (he counted), came Jack’s voice in a loud whisper. “Daddy?”

“What?”

“I’m bored.”

He opened his eyes and looked over his shoulder at Sam. He was finishing up removing the second hook from Jael’s thumb and was telling him he probably shouldn’t try again, because the third time wasn’t always a charm. “Go up with Sam. Be good and do what he tells you.” Dean handed his own pole across to Gwen while he took care of Jack’s pole.

“That didn’t take long,” she observed.

“Longer than I thought. I was sure he’d be bored before we got the worm on.”

She gestured down the lake a short ways. “Did you see that?”

With a glance that way, he nodded. Castiel and Abigael were walking together. Sean was strapped to Castiel’s chest in a baby backpack again. “Now that’s a sight I never thought I’d see. Cas carrying a baby on his chest. Blows my mind every time.”

“He seems to like kids.”

“No, not all kids. He likes _our_ kids,” he corrected. “Mine and Jo’s, yours and Sam’s. He wants to be an angel uncle.”

“Nothing wrong with that.” She leaned over a fraction closer to him. “He’s trying, Dean. He is. This is as hard for him as it is for you. Maybe even harder because he’s caught between his friendship with you and his job in heaven. They don’t always match in ideals.”

“I know that and I forgave him. Pisses me off that Death used us all against him to force Cas to do what he wanted him to.”

“You won’t change Death. That’s how he is. He’ll use any of us whenever he needs to.”

Turning his head, he studied her. “You know, Gwen, I don’t get how you can be so laid back about what Death did.”

She met his gaze and replied, “He let me live. That’s how I can be so laid back. I’m grateful for that. For the chance. He didn’t have to let me live. He could have snuffed my life out and never looked back, but he allowed me to keep going.”

“Only because he needed you to help right the balance in the world.” That was the reason Death had let Gwen live. She should have died from that car accident with the Soul Stealer, but Death had foreseen what was needed to defeat that creature: blood from all their lines. Winchester, Harvelle, and Bennett. If that hadn’t been needed, she would have been gone and Sam would have closed himself off from getting close to anyone ever again.

“The reason doesn’t matter. I’m here now and I’m grateful I’ve had the chance to keep living. Honestly, I try not to think about the big picture too much. It’d give me a headache to think about all that stuff. Death, the Fates.” She shook her head and returned her attention to the placid surface of the water. “No, thank you. I’ll just look at my own world and let Castiel and the angels worry about the rest. It is their job after all. Ours is to hunt and live our lives in the process for however long we have.”

“I’ve seen too much to do that.”

“And I’ve seen too much not to. The more I see, the more I want to focus on this, us, on what’s close. This is what’s important. Our families. I don’t want to save the world. I just want to save a few people while I’m here.” She slid her gaze to him without turning her head. “And kill a few ugly monsters. I really like that part.”

“That is a good part of it.” Dean got comfortable in his chair again and closed his eyes. He thought if nothing else happened he might be able to get a good doze going. He’d been able to feel every rock under their tent against his back even with the air mattress.

~~~~~~~~~~

“How do you know if your boyfriend loves you?”

Jo looked up. The woman who’d appeared was young and dressed in slacks, a dress shirt, and jacket that were rather inappropriate for camping. It looked like she’d taken a page out of Castiel’s camping wardrobe. “Um…I don’t know. Who _are_ you?”

Crossing to the chair beside Jo, she sat. “I’m Atropos,” she said, as if Jo should already know her identity.

“Oh.”

“Well? How did you know Dean loved you?”

“Why?”

Her sigh was impatient. “Tell me.”

“That’s a pretty personal thing to ask.”

“Is it? Why?”

“Because…. Do you think Balthazar loves you? I thought angels were generally emotionally retarded.”

She snorted. “He’s retarded all right.”

Balthazar chose that moment to saunter into the campsite. “My ears were burning.”

“I’m surprised something else doesn’t burn,” Atropos snapped with more than a little anger in the words.

Jo pursed her lips and crossed her legs. What had Balthazar done?

“Did you call me retarded, my love?” Balthazar dragged over a chair to sit on the other side of Jo.

Atropos crossed her arms. “Yes.”

“That’s not very PC of you.”

“That’s a human thing. Screw being PC. You’re retarded.”

“And you’re a manipulative, arbitrary bitch, but I don’t call you names.”

“You just did,” Jo pointed out.

“She started it,” he replied. “Honestly, I don’t know why either. We were having a lovely afternoon delight --”

“Spare me the details,” she begged, not really wanting to hear about Atropos and Balthazar’s sex life.

“--and she got mad, dressed, and left in a huff.”

Closing her eyes, Jo sighed. Wonderful. Two powerful beings with the emotional maturity of teenagers were having a lover’s spat. How could this not happen? And how could she not be their chosen counselor? She reopened her eyes. It didn’t look like she was going to get to finish the book she’d started. Too bad. She was curious what creature the author had chosen to use.

“You know what you did.” Atropos turned halfway away from Jo in the chair. “He knows what he did.”

Balthazar’s expression was bewildered. “I swear I do not.”

“Liar.” Atropos looked at Jo and raised her brows. “Well?”

“Well what?” With a sinking feeling, Jo realized that Atropos really was expecting her to be their counselor.

“Aren’t you going to ask us questions?”

Jo poured herself a cup of tea. Castiel had freshened it up for her. He’d been very concerned that she be comfortable and even suggested she rest in the tent for awhile. She then cast a longing glance at the container of cheese popcorn Castiel had retrieved from their pantry for her before he’d left to join everyone at the water. Somehow, she suspected the Fate wouldn’t appreciate Jo snacking on popcorn like they were entertainment. “Why me? I’m not a shrink.” If she’d hoped in any way to deter Atropos by telling her that, she was disappointed.

“No, but you’re in a stable relationship with Dean Winchester. That gives you far more real insight than any psychiatrist.”

“That is an excellent point,” Balthazar agreed, crossing his arms.

She took a sip of her tea and considered that a moment. “Um…. So?”

Atropos blinked and spoke slower with added emphasis, the way people sometimes spoke English to non-English speaking people, as if speaking slower and with emphasis would make them understand the language. “ _Dean Winchester_.”

With a narrowing of her eyes, Jo reached for the popcorn anyway. “Again I ask, so? Why does that give me insight?”

“Because. He’s unhinged and dangerous.”

“Very dangerous.” Balthazar nodded. “Emotionally crippled.”

“You’re one to talk about being emotionally crippled,” Atropos spat with a glare. “He’s very unstable, Jo. Dean, I mean, though Balthazar isn’t exactly the poster child for stellar emotional health.”

“Supernatural beings always say he’s unstable and dangerous. We hunt supernatural beings so,” she shrugged, “pardon me if I don’t consider your opinion on my husband’s emotional health to be valid.” Was it really a bad thing for supernatural creatures to think Dean was crazy?

Atropos adjusted her glasses. “The fact that you even have a lasting, stable, and even somewhat normal relationship is a wonder.”

Jo thought that Atropos looked smart and generally appeared smart, so why didn’t she seem to get that she was insulting them?

Balthazar leaned over. “What she said.” He sniffed. “Is that cheese popcorn?” One hand slid towards the container. “May I….?”

Jo clutched the container to her with a frown. “No, you may not. Get your own and if you two continue to piss me off by acting like my marriage is a miracle, you’re both on your own.”

“There’s no need to be peeved over this.” Atropos crossed her legs and frowned. “It’s a fact. Your lasting relationship to Dean has to be a miracle because he is unstable. Why are you upset by the statement of fact? Everyone knows it. Even Dean himself.”

“Unbelievable. You really are unbelievable.” When Jo turned her attention back to Balthazar, he’d somehow gotten his own container of popcorn, one twice the size of hers.

He smirked and tapped at it. “Mine is bigger.”

Definitely the maturity level of a teenager…and Dean on some days. She had to admit that. With a roll of her eyes, she asked, “You want questions, I’ll ask questions. How long have you known each other?”

“Known or known of?” Balthazar opened his container and tossed a few pieces into the air, catching them with his mouth.

“Known.”

Atropos cleared her throat. “We met for the first time a couple centuries ago, but it wasn’t until he decided to try and get information on why Castiel was behaving oddly awhile back that he even looked at me with any interest.”

“You mean he seduced you for information?”

Her frown deepened, as if she hadn’t thought of that before.

“Hey now.” Balthazar sat up a bit straighter. “It may have begun with that intention, but it quickly became more. She was a challenge and I adore a challenge.”

“Was?”

He waved a hand. “Is. These periodic emotional outbursts tire me, but as I’m never quite sure where they’ll lead, I am constantly intrigued by the mystery that is my lovely Atropos.”

Jo nodded and translated, “You have absolutely no idea what you did wrong and you’re hoping a little flattery might help the situation.”

He pursed his lips.

“Not only that, but you’re a little afraid of what she might do while angry, so you kiss her ass until she calms down.”

Balthazar turned his attention to his popcorn and held up one piece, studying it. “Is this real cheese in any way?”

“Nope. Cheese flavored chemical dust and don’t feel bad, Balthazar. It’s okay. Dean does the whole flattery thing, too. I’ve even heard Sam do it. Guys never get it. It’s a guy thing.”

He closed his container and set it down on the ground. “Angels are gender non-specific until we take our vessels.”

“Uh-huh. Sure.” Jo nodded and turned her attention to Atropos. “Atropos, why are you upset?”

She hesitated. “I told him that I think I love him and he said ‘thank you’ like it was a compliment.”

“What else?”

“What do you mean ‘what else’, Jo? A compliment. Isn’t it obvious that he’s emotionally retarded?”

“He’s an angel. They all are. Or at least, that’s been my understanding.”

Atropos didn’t seem comforted by that. “Abigael and Castiel feel things. They love your family. Other angels feel things, but he says ‘thank you’ and continues to nuzzle my breasts.”

“Are you sure he heard you right? Guys tend to get stupid around breasts.”

“Does Dean?”

Jo thought the answer was blindingly obvious for anyone who’d ever seen Dean check a woman out. “Uh-huh. He’s a breast man.” And an everything else man. “He can get pretty stupid over them.”

“At least Dean tells you he loves you. Balthazar can’t be bothered.”

“But darling….I don’t really know what love is.” With a snap of his fingers, Balthazar’s popcorn container disappeared. He turned in the chair and leaned over Jo, staring at Atopos with what Jo recognized as the same soldering expression Dean used. “But I want to. I want to know what love is. I want you to show me. I want to feel what love is. I know you can show me. Let’s talk about love, the love that you feel inside.”

And now _that_ song was ruined for her. Jo tried hard not to roll her eyes again and succeeded. He _would_ quote song lyrics.

Atropos turned her head to look at him. “I want an expression of your feelings for me.” She appeared to be softening, leaning over slightly.

“I give you expressions all the time, my darling.”

Jo pushed herself up from the chair. “Okay. You two continue to talk out here. I’m going to take my tea, my popcorn, and my book and go in my tent awhile. I might nap, so keep it down.”

At a last glance, as she was closing the flap, the two were sitting close and whispering to each other. Atropos had a goofy expression on her face and Balthazar had a hand high on her leg. Jo closed the flap.


	6. Chapter 6

Fishing was actually Dean’s thing. While Sam liked fishing and enjoyed it when he had the chance, it was Dean who really loved the whole process. Sam didn’t mind guarding the cooler and keeping Jack out of trouble. The boy sat on the cooler and played a game on the phone. Sam didn’t even mind taking hooks from Jael’s thumbs or helping Uzziel retrieve the pole from the tree. He enjoyed watching Gwen and Dean chatting and Castiel being a babysitter. All in all, it was honestly a relaxing moment and he was glad, because his first thought when the angels had shown up was that they were in for trouble, since that was normally the case. 

It was kind of fun to relax with them when nothing was going on. No event or being they were trying to stop. No crisis brewing. Just talking and trying to teach them how to camp. Sam thought it was a good thing to really get to know the angels. They already knew Castiel and Abigael, but as Uzziel was the other big administrator in heaven with Castiel, it was nice to chat with him as well.

His attention slid to Gwen. He considered himself lucky to have her and Sean both. The love he felt for them, while quite different from what he felt for Dean, was just as intense. They were his and he’d protect them no matter what. He and Dean had had that conversation just the previous week, discussing plans on how to keep their families safe. It was a monthly discussion now, as the boys were growing fast and Dean and Jo would have another child in months. They were always revising their plans and taking the ages of their children into account. Being proactive, Gwen had called it when he’d admitted the talks to her. They even planned for Dean’s panic attacks and they had a good reason to plan.

Crowley had reared his head again and set his newest pet at them. They’d known they’d have to deal with him eventually, though Sam had hoped Crowley would ignore them. The demon Crowley had loosed had proven that she was definitely someone they had met before. Not Meg, but another demon. She’d challenged them to figure it out, even suggested that she had been a human they’d once met. That didn’t make sense to him because the demons they’d had that conversation with had all insisted it took centuries to twist a human soul into a demon. Sam supposed maybe Crowley had stepped up the process if he’d thought she’d be a good opponent for them, especially if he had information that indicated she hated them already before she’d gotten to hell. He’d definitely have a team working on her to get her changed as fast as possible and it’d explain why he’d left them alone as long as he had.

He frowned. How soon until she launched another attack on them? That thought remained in the back of his mind and he knew it was on the rest of theirs as well. Jo thought the demon was connected to Heather’s papers somehow and Sam wondered if she might be right. The demon seemed inordinately focused on Artie Holt’s papers and that side business he’d had of dealing in cursed objects.

“I hear Angry Birds,” Gwen called out without turning her head to look at them.

The words snapped him from his solemn contemplation of Crowley’s pet demon and Sam reached out, took the phone from Jack, and paused the game, receiving an annoyed stare from the boy. “Sorry, Gwen. We’ll mute it.” He’d grown bored with the game long ago, but as Jack liked it, he’d kept it. They had one phone that had no service anymore, just games. Sam kept it charged for Jack to play with.

Dean looked over at him with a slow, easygoing grin. “No, don’t. Just because it’s scaring all the fish off.”

“I forgot.” He hadn’t. He’d just thought the volume was low enough they couldn’t hear it over at their chairs. The volume bar was already at one. Sam had forgotten Gwen’s bionic mom hearing though.

Ellen said that every mom developed the ability to hear the quietest noise out of fear for their child. He’d noticed Jo had it, too. They’d all be downstairs, with Jack upstairs playing in his room, when she’d suddenly get up, go to the stairs and yell, “Jack, stop that! I can hear you! Don’t make me come up there!”

Muting it, he handed it back. Jack took the phone and went to Jael, climbing up on his lap and settling down to play the game. If Jael had been human, that knee to his groin would have had him doubled over in pain.

“No big deal.” Dean yawned. “We’re not really expecting to catch anything with the angel brigade hanging around.”

It wasn’t the quietest with them there, true. Jael had hooked his thumb twice and Sam had yet to figure out how, while Uzziel’s enthusiastic cast had somehow landed Sam’s pole up in a tree. He’d apologized and decided he was a visual learner rather than a hands-on learner. Uzziel was content to watch Dean and Gwen and ask the occasional question, while Jael consented to learn how to play Angry Birds instead of fishing.

“Piggies.” Jack shook his head. “They mock me.”

It was almost exactly what Jo said when she played the game and couldn’t get past a level, only hers was usually punctuated by ‘crapsticks’ or other assorted not so nice words at least once.

“How are they mocking,” Jael inquired, shoving his glasses back up his nose. He had some idea that, as an assistant, he needed to wear glasses. Sam wasn’t sure where he’d gotten that idea.

“They go ‘oink, oink, oink’.”

“Oh. So, the object of the game is to hit them all?”

“Yup. Kill the piggies.” He shoved the phone into Jael’s hands. “You try.”

As he played, Jael caught his tongue between his teeth. “Hey, uh, Uz? We need an angelic version of this game. I think the librarians would really like it.”

Uzziel stepped over and peered over Jael’s shoulder. “They’d probably imagine me as the pigs,” he murmured, then glanced at Sam. “I have a tiny war going with the librarians at present.”

“Why is that,” Sam asked, reaching over and getting a bottle of water out of the cooler.

He crossed his arms. “There’s a slight possibility I may have skipped actually doing a proper drawing for the first mentorship in the program and just chose Abigael primarily because I knew who she was. It wasn’t the only criteria, of course. I’d observed her a few times back when I worked with Michael and accompanied him to the library and I’d decided long ago that if I could ever have her promoted from the library into the army, that I would. The Guardian program is just as good. The librarians ignore all of that and focus on the first part. They weren’t pleased to discover it and are insisting we test each librarian again despite most of them attempting to go through the program a few times already and failing.”

Sam thought about that a moment. “They’re mad about that? Still? That was years.”

“Surely you’ve realized by now that angels know how to hold grudges, Sam.”

“Yes, but…. Seriously?”

Jael paused the game and looked up. “Librarians aren’t the angels you want to be on the bad side of, Sam. With all the access they have to information? No, thank you. They’re dangerous. Abigael is a prime example of that. I did warn you, Uz., remember?”

“I do and thank you, Jael.”

“You’re welcome. We need this game.”

Sam smothered a grin as Uzziel rolled his eyes. He was about to say something when he saw Abigael punch thin air beside her.

~~~~~~~~~~

Dean’s wish for a good doze didn’t come true. That was okay. Maybe when he took Jack back to the tent for his nap he’d lie down too, maybe even convince Jo to lie down. Not that Jack would willingly take a nap. Getting him to rest when he started to get cranky in the afternoon was like pulling teeth. Jo usually went with the whole ‘you can play quietly in your room’ tactic while Dean went straight for telling him to lie down and go to sleep or he’d be in trouble.

He yawned and glanced over at Castiel and Abigael. It looked like they were having an intimate conversation, when Abigael suddenly pulled back an arm and punched thin air. Dean sat up. “What the hell was that?”

Gwen leaned over, flicking her forefinger in their direction. “Is she having a seizure?”

He shrugged. “Hell if I know. Can angels _have_ seizures?”

Abigael continued to enact a fight with thin air, punching, kicking, and getting thrown around. Dean wasn’t sure what to think because, while Castiel cast a glance at the sky, he didn’t appear worried. In fact, he began to ignore her fight with an invisible foe completely, looking down and making faces that had Sean giggling. Only once did he take a few steps to the right out of the way.

Dean looked at Sam, who seemed as baffled as he and Gwen were. Jack didn’t appear to notice the fight, nor did Jael, and Uzziel had a bored air about him. “Hey, uh, someone in the know want to fill the rest of us in here? What’s going on?”

Jack glanced up from the phone. “It’s a drill, daddy.”

“A drill? Someone explain with a bit more detail.”

Uzziel joined them at the water. “A drill. See, attack can come at any time, especially in calm moments such as these. As a Guardian, Abigael must remain at the top of her game. Castiel and I arrange for random surprise attacks performed by members of the angelic army. They stalk the children so their Guardian will react, and when the testing is complete, we review the data, assess the skills used, confer with the soldiers on what the Guardian should improve upon, and Castiel gives his review. Many a Guardian has stepped up his game because of this program.”

Abigael appeared, a fierce scowl on her face. She grabbed Uzziel by his shirtfront. They both disappeared and a moment later there was a loud splash from the center of the lake. Uzziel reappeared within seconds, soaking wet. 

He spit water onto the rocks. “Abigael is not what you’d call a fan of these tests.”

She reappeared beside Castiel, pointing a finger at him. Her voice carried over to them. “You’re lucky you’re holding Sean or you’d be in the lake, too. I’m telling you for the last time, Castiel, stop testing me!”

He merely took another glance at the sky and didn’t answer her. By that, Dean concluded he was far from done testing her.

“Is this what you meant earlier? You fake something --”

Though it looked like she was still shouting, Dean could no longer hear her voice. He wiggled a finger in his ear. “Did I just lose my hearing?” As he could hear himself, he concluded he hadn’t.

“If you did, I did,” Gwen replied. “Did you know they could do that? Mute themselves so we can’t hear them?”

“I didn’t know, but it makes sense with everything else they can do.”

With a frown, Uzziel reached into his shirt, removing a small flopping object. “I doubt it’s big enough for a meal, but…here.” He held out the fish that had been in his shirt. “My first successful fishing attempt.”

How could Uzziel have _not_ caught a fish while dunked in the lake? “There is never a dull moment around here.”

“Nope.” Gwen shifted in her chair. “I don’t think we’re going to catch anything.”

“Getting that feeling myself. Hey, Sam? When is a vacation not a vacation?”

“When a Winchester tries to take one,” he replied without hesitation.

“Ain’t that the truth?” He glanced at his watch. “Watch my pole for me? Time for Jack’s nap.”

This time, Jack didn’t object.

~~~~~~~~~~

When Jo woke from an unplanned nap, Jack was asleep beside her. He’d either laid down himself or Dean had tucked him in. He was clutching the teddy bear Castiel had brought for him when he was barely a year old. Jack rarely slept without it. It was an ugly thing, so much so that it was cute, and Jo had mended it several times already.

Outside, she heard Dean, Sam, and Gwen talking. There were no other voices. If the angels had returned to camp with them, they weren’t talking at present.

The scent of cooking food reached her. Though Jo waited for her stomach to rebel, it didn’t. She sighed, rolled over onto her back, and gasped to find Abigael crouched by the tent flap. “Abby,” she whispered. “What are you --”

The angel put a finger to her lips. “Don’t move. I need to listen.”

She looked around the tent, waiting for an answer as to why Abigael was there.

Abigael shifted position and launched herself against the loose flap. Conversation went silent outside and Jo heard Balthazar’s voice.

“Why Abby, I didn’t think you cared. Mind getting off of me? Atropos has something of a jealous streak.”

Carefully, so as not to disturb Jack, Jo crawled to the opening and left the tent. She found Balthazar flat on the ground by the fire, so close that his hair was in danger of singeing, and Abigael straddling him, a knife against his chest. The tip had something attached to it. “What’s going on?”

Dean looked over from the food containers. “Well, for the past couple hours, Abigael has been undergoing a round of testing.”

“Testing?”

Sam moved around foil packets on the grill over the fire. “Random soldier angels pop out at her and engage her in hand-to-hand combat to test her skills.”

“What are you doing here, Balthazar?” With a glare, Abigael pulled the tip from her knife and held the knife to Balthazar’s throat. “The truth.”

“He’s not here to try to kill you,” came Castiel’s voice from across the camp as he stepped from the woods. He still had Sean strapped to him and the baby appeared to be asleep. “I wouldn’t ask him to assist in this task. You know that.”

“Why not?” Jo checked to make sure the tent flap was closed and moved to one chair.

It was Balthazar who replied. “Because they’re all afraid I might really try to kill her.”

“The trust building exercises are going well, I see.”

“They’re right to suspect that, Jo. I might take a pot shot at her if given the chance.” 

Abigael put the tip back on her knife and stood. “Just so you know, Castiel, this isn’t making me trust anyone.”

Balthazar got up from the ground. “I’ll be going.” He disappeared.

Dean slapped a hand to Castiel’s back. “Here’s some management advice, take it or leave it, but next time? You might not want to schedule this sort of testing during a team building exercise. Defeats the purpose.”

“I’m aware of that, Dean. There was an unfortunate scheduling mishap that couldn’t be corrected.”

Jo breathed in the scent of the cooking food and savored the fact that she wasn’t having trouble with nausea.

~~~~~~~~~~

The conversation between Abigael and Castiel went on as Gwen headed for the pee pit and Jo went to wake up Jack for dinner.

“You need to stop them.”

Sam saw Castiel avoid Abigael’s gaze and look around the camp instead. “That may prove difficult.”

“Why?”

“Yeah, why, Cas?” Dean moved the foil packets onto plates.

Castiel’s answer was directed to Dean. “The assignments are sent to the garrisons and are worked out within each. The angels are then dispatched with their various assignments for certain periods. They have full authority to go about their tasks as they see fit. For these tests, they must operate within the guidelines that Uzziel and I put forth.”

“Which are?”

“No danger to humans, blunt tips on all swords, and once the soldier is defeated, he can’t mount a secondary attack unlike a real enemy.”

“She only has to worry about just one attack per soldier, then.”

“Yes. Per soldier.”

Something glinted in Castiel’s eyes right then and Sam had the feeling he wasn’t telling the full truth in some way. It was in the way he said the last two words.

“That’s not too bad, Abby.”

She ignored Dean’s encouraging tone and crossed her arms. “How many more attacks can I expect today, Castiel? Two? Five? Five hundred?”

Castiel turned his attention to the sky. “I’m uncertain the exact number. This is your big test, the one where we assess whether or not it’s necessary to assign a secondary Guardian to assist you in watching over the Winchester children or simply assign you to them full time. I gave the garrison assigned to your tests carte blanche for this test.”

“Our kids must really be handfuls if you’re contemplating a second Guardian,” Dean commented. “I know mine can be.”

“Full time?” Sam edged closer. “Why would our kids need a Guardian full time right now? Jack’s a toddler, Sean’s not even a year, and Jo and Dean’s second baby isn’t even born yet. Have they been targeted?”

“There’ve been no specific threats,” Abigael assured him. “Merely the usual.”

Castiel rubbed Sean’s back with a hand. “Though Crowley is, as always, one to keep an eye on. Just keep watch, Abigael, and you’ll do well.”

“You planned it for this weekend. _This_ weekend. I can’t believe you didn’t reschedule.”

“I did try to reschedule as soon as it was obvious the camping plans were moving forward. Orders had gone out, Abigael. There was and is nothing I can do.” The words had the ring of a lie to them.

“Bull. You can stop this with a single word right now.” She waited, resignation dawning on her face. “But you won’t, will you? You’re going to let them come. You won’t stop them.”

“No, I won’t. You’re correct.” His shoulders shifted beneath his coat and he stood up a bit straighter as an assessing stare passed between them.

Sam had to admit that he was fascinated by this glimpse of Castiel in his work environment. He was all angelic supervisor now despite Sean still strapped to his chest. He stood confident, focused, and was not going to give a single inch.

“Attacks are never convenient. The enemy doesn’t care if they are all on vacation or you are on the other side of the world. The enemy will attack wherever and whenever he finds an opening. Logic dictates that your testing should be the same.”

Her lips parted. “You suck.”

“Dean sometimes also shares that opinion.” He raised a hand, pointing a finger at the sky. “Incoming.”

She whirled, “I will _so_ get you back for this,” and disappeared.

Castiel sighed. “I’m well aware of that fact.”

“Then why do you do this?” Sam decided it might be a good idea to take Sean back from him. “Hand me my kid back. No more using him as a human shield so Abby won’t retaliate.”

Dean chuckled.

“You understand the reasons, Sam.” He began to undo the straps keeping Sean in the backpack. “Don’t pretend you don’t. Even you four train when you’re not working. You do so to keep your skills intact and not only do you train, but you set about learning new skills. We do as well.”

“I think Abby’s proven herself.”

With a shake of his head, he finished unbuckling Sean and handed him to Sam. “All remaining angels need to keep proving themselves to be capable and faithful. We failed before. We fell into petty disagreements and ended up in a civil war. We fell asleep, Sam, and that can’t happen again. We must keep our skills sharp. Our Father demands it and we are accountable.”

He cradled Sean to him and studied the angel. “How is heaven these days? I mean, we haven’t really talked about it. We talk about everything else and around everything else, but never about heaven.”

“Heaven is organized and running as smoothly as we can make it. It’d only run smoother if Michael was in place, but as that won’t happen, we’re as good as we can be. The departments are back in efficient working relationships with each other --”

“I mean the whole thing with Death, Castiel. How’s that going?”

“Oh, _him_.” 

That one inflection told Sam a ton of things, like that Castiel would just as soon forget Death was running around topside without someone holding a leash on him. 

Castiel shoved his hands in his coat pockets. “We ignore each other. At my last meeting with God, he told me I wasn’t to accept any more of Death’s invitations to attend the weekly balance meetings and to let him know if Death did extend an invitation.”

“God stepped in?”

“He’s in the world, Sam, just…observing how we handle everything at present. Like with humans.”

He adjusted Sean in his arms and glanced towards the direction of the angel camp. “Does he…you know…hear our prayers?”

“Always. He hears every prayer that’s spoken, thought, or whispered on the wind. He sees, Sam, and some day you will see him and know him for himself. Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to prepare the next wave of attacks on Abigael before she returns from this one.”

“Man, Cas.” Dean shook his head. “Remind me never to go on a team building exercise with _you_.”

Sam saw a slight quirk of Castiel’s lips in an amused smile before he was gone.


	7. Chapter 7

Camping wasn’t exactly how Dean remembered it. He recalled it as fun and relaxing, and their first day had been just that, but today was a lot less fun than it should have been. Now wasn’t measuring up to his nostalgia. Not that now was bad, it was simply different.

The angels had left an hour earlier, Abigael muttering about payback. They hadn’t heard or seen them since. So far, nothing too bad had happened, but he had to wonder if they were on borrowed time. Could they manage to get through another day and two nights without big trouble?

Sam and Gwen were cuddled together sitting on the ground on the opposite side of the fire and Sean was in his carrier dozing, while Jack played on the ground between Dean and Jo’s chairs.

He glanced at Jo. She was staring at the fire and looked half asleep, bundled up in her coat with a blanket around her. He was about to suggest they make s’mores early when Jack stood up beside him.

“Daddy, look! I found a snake!” He held up a wiggling snake right in front of Dean.

Dean’s heart seemed to stop beating in his chest for several long seconds before he identified the snake as the average and harmless garden variety. “Jack, put the snake down.”

“Okay.” He dropped it.

It fell by Jo’s foot and she raised her feet with an indrawn breath. “Not here! Take it over to the path and get rid of it.” In the dim light from the fire, Dean could tell she was trying not to scream hysterically. Snakes were the things that freaked her out the most. He remembered the Medusa case they’d once had where Jo had spent over an hour trying to wash off ‘snake cooties’ after accidentally touching the creature’s live snake hair.

Gwen got up from her chair and bent. “I’ll get it.” She picked it up and hurried several steps towards the path to the angel camp, tossing the snake. Returning, she washed her hands. “It’s gone, Jo. You can put your feet back down and breathe again.”

“Snakes are gross and disgusting. I don’t know how any of you can pick one up. Yuck!” Jo shivered.

“Jack.” Dean gently pulled the boy to him and lifted him up onto his lap. “We talked about picking up things like that before we even got in the car to come here. What did mommy and I say?”

“No picking up snakes or spiders or bugs or frogs or beetles.”

“Apologize for dropping the snake on mommy’s foot.”

“I’m sorry mommy.”

Jo settled back down in her chair. “No harm done. It’s gone. It _better_ be gone. Why don’t we go ahead and have s’mores?”

“Excellent idea.” Dean could eat a few of the treats right now. 

“I’ll get everything.” Gwen got up to get out the supplies. 

He held on to Jack to keep him out of the way.

What should have taken a minute at most turned into a search where Gwen opened every container. “I know we had graham crackers. I saw them this morning. They’re just not here now.”

When all eyes turned to Dean, even Jack’s, he held up a hand. “Hey, it wasn’t me. I like graham crackers in things, not plain.”

“I’ll go see if we can borrow the ones the angels had.” Jo stood, tugged her blanket tighter around herself and reached for one flashlight. “Not like they’ll eat them anyway. I’ll be back in a bit.” She turned on the flashlight and headed for the path. The snake must have been gone because there were no screams.

Time passed and Dean squinted at his watch. What was taking Jo so long? The light faded even further, Sam taking Jack to the pee pit. Dean slouched down in his chair and let his head drop to one side as he observed Gwen adding wood to the fire. He saw movement around her ankles and there was just enough light to get a decent look at the creature that had joined them.

“Um…Gwen?”

“Yeah?” She continued to add pieces of wood to the fire, not appearing to notice the small creature.

On one hand, the humor of her with a skunk under her was too good to ignore. On the other, he didn’t think they had any tomato juice in case it sprayed. “You want to not make any sudden moves.”

“Why?” She glanced over her shoulder at him, hand paused by the wood she was moving onto the fire.

“Well….”

Sam and Jack chose that moment to return from the pee pit, Jack exclaiming, “Kitty! You got a kitty!”

“That’s not a kitty,” Sam said, making a grab for Jack’s arm. “Um…Gwen? Don’t move.”

Slowly, Gwen peered down at the creature. It nuzzled against her ankles and legs like the cat back home did. “Oh, crap. I can’t move or it’ll spray, won’t it?”

“I want the kitty, daddy.” Jack strained against Sam’s grip on him.

“It’s not a cat.” Dean slowly sat up in his chair. “Keep a hold on him, Sam. Jack, it’s a skunk. See the white on it? Cats don’t usually have coloring like that.”

“Guys?” Gwen cleared her throat. “My thigh muscles are screaming right now.”

“I don’t think any of us can move.” Sam slowly backed away with Jack.

The skunk sniffed at the ground, made it’s way over to the carrier, sniffed at Sean’s feet, then ambled back to where Dean sat. He waited for the stench of skunk to permeate the air and was frankly surprised when it didn’t happen. The creature headed off into the woods.

Gwen sat hard on the ground. “I’ve never had anything like that happen before.” She uttered a half laugh. “That was weird.”

“Weird is fine,” Dean told her. “As long as it’s not the bad sort of weird.”

There was the sound of a throat clearing and Jo stepped into the camp, wiggling the package of graham crackers in her hand. “I got them. I also got ‘Uzziel-ed’. He wouldn’t stop talking.” She frowned, looking at all of them. “What’s going on? What’d I miss?”

Dean couldn’t help laughing.

~~~~~~~~~~

It was early, barely even dawn. Castiel strolled along the edge of the water. When he’d claimed the day before that he didn’t know the number of attacks Abigael could expect, he’d been stretching the truth. He hadn’t known for certain the number of attacks by soldiers, though he had known they were only for the previous day. He wondered if she’d be pleased to know that she’d passed with only a few suggestions this time from the soldiers.

As for the guidelines, it was true the soldiers could only attack once. However, anyone else who was enlisted by Castiel after the official tests to attack her could continue to do so.

Exactly what he had planned for the day. He’d even rolled it into the paintball session Uzziel had planned. It was supposed to be fun, one team of two trying to get through a section of the woods without being tagged. They also had to take out the other angels on the way. He’d proposed that Abigael and Jael make up the team and he, Uzziel, and Balthazar be the ones pursuing, although with Balthazar still with Atropos at her camp, it might be just Uzziel and Castiel. Once they were done with the team challenge, they could move on to a free for all to win. That should take up a few hours and they could do a more thorough search of the area while they were out.

Searches hadn’t turned up whatever it was they were all sensing. Even Balthazar had noticed it before he’d decided Atropos was better company than any of them. Nothing about what they knew was out there had changed, it was simply there, waiting. He frowned, did a last sweep, and went to help Uzziel with the paintball supplies.

~~~~~~~~~

“Mommy.”

The whisper was close to her ear and Jo suppressed a sigh. It was too early. She wanted to stay in bed. The air mattress wasn’t completely flat this morning and it was somewhat comfortable. She could go back to sleep if Jack would just stop talking to her.

“Mommy.”

“What,” she whispered back. A warm body moved against her midsection and she frowned. How was Jack talking in her ear when he was down by her stomach?

“Kitty came to sleep with you.”

Kitty? Her eyes popped open. Raising her head, she glanced down and saw a skunk cuddled against her stomach sound asleep. She sucked in an alarmed breath.

Jack came into view, crawling over her legs and lying down. He pressed his cheek against the skunk like he did with the stray cat back at the house. “Good kitty.”

“Sweetie, that’s not a cat. It’s a skunk.”

“Kitty.”

“Skunk. See the stripe?”

“Kitty.” He petted it. “Nice kitty. It’s Kitty nummer two. Kitty Two.”

Jo swallowed hard. “Where’s daddy,” she whispered, barely daring to breathe. What was with Jack’s insistence that the damn thing was a cat?

“Daddy got coffee.”

“Go get him very slowly and be quiet.”

“Okay.” He crawled over her again. “Come on, Kitty Two. We get daddy for mommy.”

Amazingly, the skunk yawned, stretched, and followed him out of the tent. Jo breathed a sigh of relief. “My son is Dr. Doolittle,” she said to thin air.

In seconds came Dean’s startled and somewhat strangled cry. “Jack! Get away from the skunk! I told you last night it’s not a cat.”

Jo rolled over and waited. The flap opened.

Dean filled the opening. “I thought the flap was closed, Jo.”

“It followed him. It got up and followed him when he told it to. That’s bizarre.”

“Maybe it’s his superpower.” A small grin quirked his lips. “You want to sleep some more? I’ll double check the flap this time.”

“No, let’s get moving. What’s on the agenda? More fishing?”

“No. At least not this morning. For us, I thought a nature hike going south about mid-morning. The angels are playing paintball to the north then and I think we should clear out while mayhem ensues and Abigael gets her revenge on Cas. I fully expect to see him covered in paint later.”

“Paintball?” She pushed up to sit and smiled at the idea of the angels playing paintball. It was a surprisingly normal team-building thing to do, though she would have thought it’d go better with more angels to form teams with. “Let me guess. Uzziel?”

“You know it.” Leaning in, he planted a kiss on her lips. “You want breakfast?”

“What’s on?”

“Oatmeal courtesy of Gwen. We had a visitor sometime in the middle of the night. The marshmallows and about half our food is gone. Has the marks of a raccoon all over the theft.”

“I thought we had everything locked down tight.”

“We did. I checked before I came to bed last night, but the theft happened anyway.”

“Awesome. Snakes, skunks, raccoons. It’s wild kingdom in our camp. I’ll pass. Just hand me in some crackers.”

He licked his lips and glanced over his shoulder. “Sorry to say, those are gone, too. The mangled package was near the pee pit. Sam consented to ask one of the angels to retrieve more for you seeing as how it’s an emergency.”

“Nice. I’ll just lie down until they get here.” About half an hour and a few crackers later, Jo emerged from the tent, stood and stretched. She greeted Uzziel with a thank-you for bringing the crackers.

“Castiel went immediately when Sam told him what had happened.”

“Thank him for me.”

“I will. He’s laying out a few traps right now or he’d be here.”

“Right. The paintball. Have fun.” The more she thought about it, the funnier angels playing paintball seemed. “Build some good team trust.”

He nodded. “Thank you, Jo. I look forward to the experience. Castiel and I are already deciding strategy and I believe Abigael and Jael are as well. They were deep in conversation when I came here.” 

She found that she was actually having fun. Her phone had chirped a few times with more get well messages from Marissa (amazing that she even had service out here) and the angels were a great source of lighthearted amusement. She half suspected them of trying to help Dean make sure the trip was fun for her. “Alright, family. Let’s get this day going. Gwen, let’s take the boys by the water and see if we can’t see any fish, or frogs, or something and let the guys finish the coffee and clean up.”

Dean, Sam, and Gwen all stared at her.

“What?”

“Are you okay,” Sam asked, pouring himself more coffee.

“I’m great. I’m getting into the camping spirit, so…let’s do this.”

The three exchanged a bemused glance and Dean shrugged. “Sound like a plan, Jo. We’ll take care of things here.”

“We’ll be back in a bit.”

Jack was full of energy, Gwen was looking at her like she didn’t quite know what to think about Jo’s good mood, and Sean had an alert stare for everything. Jo put her hands in her pockets and was just happy that she didn’t have any nausea at all for the first time in weeks. 

~~~~~~~~~~

Jo’s mood seemed to be improving while everyone else’s plummeted. It was an interesting mystery as to why she was so chipper, but Dean was too tired to think much about it. He was merely glad she was apparently enjoying herself.

“I’ve been meaning to ask.” Uzziel stepped towards the tents. He appeared to be in no hurry to return to his own camp. “Why is your tent so much bigger than the other one? Is it due to your small child?”

“No.” Dean glanced up from his coffee. He hadn’t felt this sleep deprived since Jack was a couple days old. He’d barely slept at all, unable to get comfortable, while Jo and Jack had gone right to sleep. Every pebble and rock under the tent was congregated right beneath his sleeping bag and the mattress. “It’s more because my wife doesn’t camp. Bribery. Jo wouldn’t camp in a smaller tent.”

“They have to have a bigger tent so the air mattress fits.” Sam pulled open the flap to show him. “See? It just fits in there.”

“I measured,” Dean told him. He and the salesman had crawled around with a measuring tape making sure.

“How come Sam and Gwen don’t have one?”

“We don’t need one.” Sam let the flap fall and put his hands in his pockets.

“We might as well not have the stupid thing anyway,” Dean said after making sure Jo, Gwen, and the kids were out of earshot. “It goes flat and there’s a boulder field underneath. I could barely get up this morning. Had a back spasm. Do you know how painful those are?” 

“That’s probably more from having been thrown against walls, headstones, desks, tables, and across rooms for twenty years than a few pebbles on the ground under your mattress.” Sam looked like he was trying not to grin.

“Boulders,” Dean insisted. “I wanted the family sized tent that would have fit all of us. It was awesome.” That tent had been a beauty, but no way could he have gotten it home and then set up here without Jo noticing it.

Uzziel seemed to perk up. “The one with the awning at either end? Big enough to stand up in? Displayed with cots, chairs, and tables at the Everything Camping Outlet?”

He pointed a finger at Uzziel. “That’s the one.”

“That _was_ a fantastic tent.”

“I know, right? Sam said it was too big.”

Sam’s snort was soft. “Dean, it would have covered this entire clearing.”

“But it would have been nice. Admit it, Sam. We could have sat under the awning --”

“We have trees all overhead. There’s shade without needing an awning. And we already had two tents. Three if you count this one here you bought after you told Jo about the trip.”

After her reaction, Dean had taken Sam with him and driven to the outlet to purchase a bigger tent and an air mattress. They’d barely gotten there before closing.

“We don’t need a huge family tent. Remember when we didn’t even _use_ tents? Sleeping under the stars?”

“Of course I remember. I was there and, as I recall, it poured rain that last time. We were soaked and I got sick from it.”

“You were getting sick _before_ we camped out.”

“That’s not how I remember it.”

“It never is and you were cranky for days. We didn’t even buy a tent until you started seeing Jo and had visions of enticing her camping running through your head. You knew even then that she wasn’t the camping kind of woman. She showed no interest in it at all. The tent was stored at Bobby’s until a couple weeks ago when you had this idea.”

The second tent was Gwen’s tent and Dean had actually had a tent before that point. He drank the last swallow of his coffee and admitted, “I had another tent, Sam. With Lisa and Ben. Ben more than her.” He was finding that time had made the memories easier to talk about, especially since he now knew Ben never considered that he’d failed as a father to him. “We set it up in the backyard a couple times. Ben and I slept in it, cooked on one of those portable fire pit things Lisa borrowed from a friend of hers.” He recalled Lisa claiming she was expecting a call and didn’t want to interrupt the backyard camping by taking it outside. He and Ben had stayed outside the entire night with her only coming out a few times to bring them things like marshmallows. “She wouldn’t come out with us and stay. At the time, I thought she didn’t want to intrude on the time I was having with Ben.”

He saw a wariness in Sam’s eyes, like he was wondering if he should say something or not.

“But it wasn’t that and I know better now.” He began to clean up from breakfast. “Jo doesn’t like camping, but she came. She’s been participating and a good sport about it. She’s here even though she doesn’t want to be.”

Uzziel half turned to look in the direction Jo and Gwen had gone. “Trust me, Dean. She wants to be here with you.” He smiled softly. “Now if you’ll excuse me. I have to go play paintball.”

“Heaven help us,” Dean murmured. “Angels playing paintball.”

“Yeah, no kidding,” Sam added as Uzziel disappeared.

With Sam’s help, cleaning up didn’t take long and they were ready for when Jo and Gwen came back. Jack was psyched for the hike and as soon as Sam changed Sean, they were ready to go.


	8. Chapter 8

“How do you deal with a difficult woman in the long-term?”

Dean blinked. A second ago, he’d been watching Jo and Gwen doing some goofy square dance in a clearing just to get Jack back in a good mood. The skunk had followed them for awhile on their hike and when it had veered off into the woods, Jack had wanted to go after it. He’d started to throw a fit when they wouldn’t let him. Now, Dean was in a different clearing looking at Balthazar, who was gazing at him with expectation. “‘Scuse me?”

“A difficult woman? Opinionated? Stubborn?” He rolled his eyes and let out an exaggerated sigh. “If only Gabriel were alive. I’d ask him, but instead of his fount of experience to draw from, I have you. None of my brethren are adventurous enough to attempt a relationship of the sort I have with Atropos. You, on the other hand, married a difficult woman. Now tell me, Dean.” He crossed his arms. “Difficult women. Is it best to avoid confrontation or meet it head on?”

“Jo isn’t difficult. I’ll give you the opinionated and stubborn part though.”

“Dean. Please. May I remind you that you’ve referred to your lovely bride as a pain in the ass on several occasions?”

He pointed a stern finger at the angel. “You don’t call her that.”

“Merely reminding you of what you yourself have voiced in the past. Come now. I need your wisdom. I already used your quoting of song lines and found the technique quite satisfactory, but I need more techniques to use.”

“I never told you about that.”

“No. Your life is an open book. I took a glance and took your example. It worked, so I’m willing to listen to more of your human words of wisdom regarding females.”

“Aren’t you supposed to be playing paintball right now?” All the angels in the camping group were. Cas had made it clear that they were going to be spending a chunk of the day in mock battle.

“Focus, Dean. I am open to your wisdom here. Teach me.”

“You’re whacked.” Dean looked around the clearing, wondering what direction he needed to start walking to get back.

“That may be, but I’m in a delicate position right now. I have a volatile, difficult female demanding to know if I love her and where our relationship is going when I have no idea on either of those matters. I’m in a bit of a bind here. She could end me with one vengeful flick of her feathered pen. I need advice.”

“You’re the one got in bed with her.” He glanced up at the sky, but a canopy of leaves shielded his view. Dean couldn’t tell where the sun was. He pulled out his phone and pressed the compass app.

“Your point?”

Seriously? Did Balthazar truly not understand what that meant? “Am I supposed to care if she ends you?” He was inclined to help in that case. With a glance at his phone, he let out a disgusted snort. The app had gone haywire, refusing to settle down on a direction. “Where the hell did you bring me? Which way is north?”

“Just give me a few words of wisdom and I’ll take you back to your bland little stroll with your family.”

Closing the app, Dean put his phone away. “Advice, huh? Okay. Make sure you show her you care about her. You _do_ care about her?” He crossed his arms.

“Of course I do. I simply don’t know if I love her.”

He thought a moment. “Treat her like she’s the most important person in the world. A queen. An empress. A goddess.”

“If I wanted a goddess, Kali is available.”

“Balthazar.”

“Well, it’s true. She’s actively looking for love.”

“Scary. The point is, you want your woman to feel special and doing all that is a start.”

“I spend _time_ with her. I ducked out of several meetings with Castiel this past quarter to meet with her. She should feel special. Castiel isn’t only a friend, he’s technically my boss.” He mimicked Dean’s stance.

“Wow, that’s…touching. Ducking responsibility for a quickie.”

“I never said it was quick.”

Dean sighed. “Do you do things for her?”

A smug smirk tugged his lips. “Do I ever.”

“Aside from that. Bring her flowers, candy? Take her nice places? Give her gifts?”

“Is that what you do for your difficult woman?”

Dean gritted his teeth. “Jo isn’t difficult and if you say that one more time, you can fend for yourself.”

“You keep saying she isn’t difficult when she so obviously is and --”

“That’s it.” He shook his head. “Take me back now. You insult my wife and have the nerve to ask for my help? No. Be an adult angel and deal with it on your own.”

Balthazar snorted and grasped his arm. Dean found himself back in the clearing with Jo, Gwen, and Jack. However, Sam and Sean were now gone.

“What happened?” Gwen picked up Jack. “You were there and then you weren’t.”

“We looked and looked,” Jack informed him. “I found Kitty Two again.”

Sure enough, the skunk was in the clearing. It was lying down looking like it was waiting with them. Dean was beginning to wonder if the skunk was some sort of supernaturally changed being who’d taken a liking to them. It certainly seemed to understand Jack when he talked to it.

“And now Sam’s gone.” Jo closed the canteen in her hand. “What’s going on?”

“Balthazar.” The name should be explanation enough and he saw Jo’s eyes widen.

“Still having problems with Atropos is he,” she asked.

“Ahh…. You know about that?”

“Let’s just say I hate playing therapist. Where did he take you?”

“Some place where the compass didn’t work. I don’t know. How long was I gone?”

“About ten minutes.”

He glanced down at his watch. “I’ll give Sam five before Balthazar decides his advice is useless or ole Balty pisses him off and he demands to be brought back. We got anything to eat with us? I’m kind of hungry.”

Jo handed him a baggie of jerky and he sat on a log while they waited.

~~~~~~~~~~

While Dean’s disappearance was sudden, it didn’t really alarm Sam too much considering there were angels nearby. It was something one of them could do and he doubted much of anything supernatural was going to get by them, especially considering both Castiel and Abigael were there. Still, they made the effort of looking. Instead of Dean, they found the skunk. It trotted right over to Jack and rubbed up against his legs. The boy was ecstatic that ‘kitty two’ had come back.

Gwen pulled a vial from her jacket pocket and sprinkled the skunk with the contents. It didn’t sizzle, so he guessed the animal wasn’t possessed. She shrugged. “Worth a shot.”

“I guess we wait,” Sam asked Jo and Gwen. “Maybe Castiel needed him for something?”

Before they could answer, Dean was back. Sam caught a glimpse of his annoyed expression before he found himself in another clearing.

“Sam, Sam, Sam.”

“What the --” He whirled and saw Balthazar across the clearing from him. “You. What do you want?”

“Dean was no help whatsoever, which quite surprised me given his history with women, so I turn to you now for advice on women.” His glance slid down Sam and back up, lingering on Sean in the backpack against Sam’s chest. “I must be desperate.”

“Help with what?”

“You know I’m involved with Atropos?”

“Yeah, and?”

“How do you deal with your difficult woman?”

Was he implying Gwen was difficult? Where did he get that idea? “Gwen isn’t difficult.”

Balthazar blinked, let out a scoffing breath, and blinked again. “Are you high? Delusional? I know Dean certainly is. _He_ thinks his wife is even-tempered.”

“Jo is and Gwen isn’t difficult.”

“I see you aren’t going to be any help either.”

He wrapped his arms around Sean and considered the angel a moment. “Are you and Atropos having relationship problems?”

“Sshhh!” Balthazar held up his hands. “Don’t say her name so loud. She has that ‘mom hearing’ your wife and Jo have.” He nodded. “Yes, I’m having issues of a sort. She wants to commit and I’m not entirely certain I’m ready for that.”

“I think you should be committed,” Sam said, unable to keep the fervent tone from his voice.

He twitched a brow. “How did you decide Gwen was the woman for you?”

“Well, it wasn’t overnight. It was months of thinking and soul-searching and then when she was a breath from dying I realized I didn’t want to waste any more time if she woke up and she did wake.”

“I don’t have that sort of gauge with Atropos.” He almost seemed sad about that.

“Do you love her?”

“What is love? She keeps asking me if I love her or not and I don’t know really. I love that she’s never quite the same female whenever we meet. There’s always another facet of her to ferret out and enjoy.”

“Sounds to me like you’re hooked.”

“Perhaps I am. However, she’s also opinionated, stubborn, doesn’t forgive easily, and is, quite frankly, an arbitrary bitch.”

None of that appeared to bother Balthazar in the least. “That’s Fate for you. You can’t change her, Balthazar. Can you live with that?”

“Yes, of course I can. I have so far and I don’t want to change her. I like her for who and what she is.”

“Then I think you have your answer. Keep doing what you have been and be honest with her. It’s okay to be unsure of your feelings, especially since you angels are sort of new to it. Talk to her about it.”

__

“That’s your advice? Talk about it?”

“Pretty much. Honesty in a relationship is best. I mean, if you’re not sure --”

Exasperation slid across his face. “Useless. You and Dean both.”

Sam had to laugh at that. “What sort of advice are you looking for? You’ve been with her this long. You’re obviously doing something right. You admit you’re intrigued by her on a daily basis and care about her. There is no test that’ll tell you if you love her or not.”

“There has to be something. An easier way.”

“Uh…nope. Sorry. Relationships are hard and they don’t always work.”

“Damn.” He waved a hand. “You’re certain?”

“Yeah. You’re going to have to work for this. Is she worth it?”

Balthazar’s face reflected anxiety mixed with determination. He didn’t answer and Sam was suddenly back at the other clearing, where Dean was telling Jo and Gwen about his run-in with Balthazar.

~~~~~~~~~~

It was late afternoon when the angels tromped back to see them. There was no evidence of their day with paint, though Abigael seemed rather smug with herself as she settled in one chair.

“Who won,” Dean asked, searching for the rest of the marshmallows. They’d borrowed the bag the angels had had and he knew they’d been in the food box when they’d left for an after lunch stroll by the water, all sealed up tight, but he couldn’t seem to find them.

Castiel stepped over to join him. “Abigael and Jael successfully navigated their team effort and --”

“I wasn’t even trying,” Uzziel insisted. “We should have a rematch.”

“They caught you daydreaming, huh?” Dean gave up trying to find the marshmallows. “Sorry, family. The marshmallows are gone. Unless one of you put them somewhere else.”

“Why does our food keep disappearing? Where is it going? I don’t buy that raccoons are getting it all.” Jo moved to the container and began to take an inventory. “That box of graham crackers we borrowed from the angels is here, but now the chocolate bars are gone. Do raccoons even eat chocolate?”

“Wasn’t me this time.” Dean denied it with a shake of his head. “I restrained myself.”

The debate on what could have happened to the food continued until Jack let out a scream. It was the ant scream and he ran to Jo, clinging to her leg. 

She pried his hands loose and crouched down. “It’s okay, sweetie. They won’t hurt you. We’ve been over this.”

“You were serious at our camp when you said he’s afraid of ants?” Uzziel’s brows rose as he asked the question and he excused himself from the conversation he was having with Abigael.

“It’s normal for a kid to be afraid of something like that.” Dean recognized that his response was a tad testy. “Snakes, spiders…clowns….”

“Ants,” Sam said. “They’re hardly the same as clowns, Dean.”

“A fear is a fear, okay? We’ll just wait and see what your kid is afraid of. Probably something like butterflies.”

“I hadn’t realized….” Uzziel licked his lips. “May I assist?”

“Assist?”

“Help with that fear?”

“Oh.” Dean considered it. Since Jack had gotten over his fear of Uzziel, or whatever the problem had been, he shrugged. “Knock yourself out.”

Uzziel approached Jack and knelt. “May I show you something, Jack?”

Jo glanced over at Dean. “Dean?”

“It’s okay.”

She pressed a kiss to Jack’s temple. “Let’s see what Uzziel has for you, okay?”

Jack put a finger in his mouth and nodded. He didn’t protest when Jo drew him slightly towards Uzziel.

Uzziel sat the rest of the way and reached out to the ground. “Watch.” He put a finger down on the ground. One ant veered from the line and came to it, climbing up it. He raised his hand, the ant scurrying about only on that finger. “See? It’s not hurting me at all. It’s only a tiny bug, very much smaller than either of us.”

Taking a finger out of his mouth, Jack bent to Uzziel to take a closer look. He frowned.

“Ants are necessary in this world’s food chain. What would an anteater eat if there were no ants?”

With a solemn nod, Jack said, “Anteaters look funny.”

“They do to us, but not to other anteaters. Would you like to hold the ant?”

“Like kitty?”

“Sort of. You have to be even more gentle or you’ll hurt the ant.”

While Dean was slightly impressed with Uzziel’s tactics, he wouldn’t put it past Jack to take the ant and squish it. They’d had to remind him a ton of times not to hold the cat too tightly, though the cat hadn’t minded. She’d butted her head against Jack and purred, kneading with her paws.

Slowly, Jack held out his hand. Uzziel touched his palm with the finger and the ant walked down onto it.

“He’ll stay right there in your palm, I promise.”

A slow shy smile formed. “Tickles.”

“Do you see? Nothing to fear.”

Dean stepped back to stand with Castiel. “He’s not bad with kids.”

Castiel nodded and when he spoke, his voice was low. “I’ll be sending Uzziel back to heaven soon. Most likely by morning. You were right about his daydreaming during our match today. His thoughts are returning to Ellen again and remaining there the longer we’re here on earth.”

“His weakness is that bad?”

“It is and he recognizes it. We all have weaknesses. His place is heaven, but he hopes some day he can spend more time here.”

Some day he could. Ellen wouldn’t live forever, though Dean wondered if another woman would take her place as Uzziel’s weakness. “Some of you weren’t meant to be on earth.”

“No. Some weren’t.” He cleared his throat. “Abigael and Jael did well today. I’m considering Jael for the program.”

“I thought he was Uzziel’s assistant?”

“His testing with Balthazar went far better than I’d thought it would. I haven’t told him yet. There’s Uzziel to consider. Jael has been his assistant for awhile and for him to surpass Uzziel and pass the program might cause jealousy. Still, I have to consider if Jael himself is ready for this step.”

Dean glanced across the camp at Jael. He was deep in conversation with Gwen. “Does he have that ambition? I mean, is he happy where he is? If he’s happy, why jinx it? If he keeps Uzziel in check, might be best to keep him there.”

“That’s a good point.” He leaned against the tree trunk. “These are the kind of decisions I make these days. At times I don’t feel adequate for the job.”

“Heaven seems to be running smoothly. I’d say God picked the best angel to run things.”

“Thank you, Dean. I’m pleased you think so.”

He turned to go through the containers again. “Now, tell me about how badly Abigael kicked your ass today.”

It was gratifying to hear what sounded like a chuckle come from Castiel. “It was sad. I think I pushed her too far with the constant attacks.”

As they talked, he continued to search the containers. Where the hell was their food disappearing to?

~~~~~~~~~~

With Dean, Sam, and the boys off doing some mystery task, Gwen and Jo remained at the camp. The angels had gone again, this time for a ‘feelings seminar’ that they planned to drag Balthazar and Atropos to. Uzziel had mentioned he had a special speaker lined up. Gwen briefly wondered who it was. Dr. Phil? Oprah? She wouldn’t put it past him to arrange that in his enthusiasm.

Jo was attempting to read that book she’d started and Gwen wandered restlessly around the camp. She had a feeling that things were going far too well for them all. Was it a sign of how paranoid she was that she assumed a weekend without real trouble meant there was bigger trouble about to happen? That the other shoe had to drop and soon? She didn’t particularly like it when things got quiet.

Gwen crouched down to check the fire. “You need to tell him, Jo. I thought you would the first day we were here.” When Jo ignored her, she asked, “when are you going to tell him?”

“Tell him what?” Her tone was innocent and she turned a page in her book.

“Jo.” She glanced over her shoulder at her.

“What?” She turned the page down and closed the book, setting it aside. “Not my fault he keeps misunderstanding that ‘don’t’ doesn’t mean ‘can’t’.”

“He thinks you can’t camp, like can’t do any of the camping jobs.”

“I _am_ rusty.”

Gwen snorted. “You weren’t when you and I did that four day stint trying to disprove those Yeti pictures that surfaced.”

“That was like four, five years ago. It was before Dean and I got married. I can totally be rusty.”

“You’re not rusty or incompetent or any other words like that. You’re pretty good at this stuff.” Jo was a good camper when she absolutely had to be. Gwen remembered that.

“Don’t tell Dean that. He’ll want to go camping all the time then and his misunderstanding has gotten me out of all these icky jobs.”

“This will backfire on you. You know it will. Honesty, remember? The two of you sharing everything?”

“Yeah, yeah.” She shifted in the chair. “Maybe I’ll tell him who Garth’s new girlfriend is first, sort of do a which is worse thing. My lie of omission or that?”

“Who is his new girlfriend and how did you find out? He never says her name.” She stood.

“I’ve been running every number he calls from. I do that for all numbers I don’t recognize. Don’t you?”

Refusing to be distracted, Gwen moved to the chair beside her. “Spill. Do I know her?”

“You’ve met….”

“Tell me.”

She scratched a finger to her temple. “Becky Rosen.”

“Sam’s stalker Becky?” Had she heard right?

“Yup.”

“How did they meet? And how long have you known?”

“I’ve known since about a month ago when he called from her home phone. She has a landline. I found out, then rather than ask him straight up how they met, I found her professional blog, her personal one, her Facebook and Twitter accounts, YouTube channel, and Tumblr account.”

“You stalked Sam’s stalker?”

“Not stalked,” Jo corrected. “ _Am_ stalking.”

“You have too much time on your hands.”

“Can’t do much but computer work while feeling sick all the time, Gwen. It’s a sad fact.”

Gwen sighed. Thank God they were going home in the morning. Maybe they could get home before Dean realized his mistake in thinking Jo couldn’t camp. She’d sort of like to miss out on that fight. “How did he hook up with her?”

“It was love at first sight. According to her personal blog, Facebook, and Twitter feed anyway. She was working some non-Supernatural convention and he wandered through. She doesn’t seem to know he’s a hunter though. They have overnights and --”

She covered her ears. “Ugh! Too much information, Jo.”

“Just relaying what she’s posted.” She drew her blanket up a bit higher. “I’ll keep an eye on them. I’ve got Marissa on the task. I told her Garth is a friend and I’m worried Becky will break his heart.”

“You’re bad.”

Dean and Sam came back with the boys about an hour later, Jack proudly telling Jo that they’d seen a deer and hadn’t even scared it away. He sat on the ground at Jo’s feet and the skunk hurried over to curl up beside him.

Gwen made a mental note to check up on shape shifting creatures that could change into skunks when they got home. There had to be some reason the thing was following Jack all over the place.


	9. Chapter 9

Castiel was in the middle of arguing with Abigael about training methods for Guardians when he felt it, like a warm breeze in the air.

Magic.

It wasn’t human magic, however. Human magic didn’t smell of wilderness and animal. He felt the tingle of it against his skin, felt it slide over him, attempting to get a foothold before it slipped from him and tumbled into the woods towards the Winchester camp.

“Get the children out,” he ordered her. “Now!” 

She was already moving and by the time he, and the others reached the camp, she was gone, along with Jack and Sean. Sam, Dean, Jo, and Gwen were sprawled on the ground and in their chairs, unconscious. Castiel bit back a curse when he realized why Abigael hadn’t taken Jo with her. The magic had beaten Abigael to the camp. The child inside Jo wasn’t in danger, but there was something off about all of the Winchesters that he couldn’t put his finger on until Atropos spoke.

Atropos crouched down and placed a hand first on Sam’s shoulder, then Gwen’s. “Their souls are in the wrong bodies,” she said and he wondered how she could tell without them being awake to show mannerisms. Atropos looked up at him. “These two are switched. Those two are switched.” She stood. “Trust me, Castiel. I know what I’m talking about.”

“How?”

“I have insight you don’t into each person, remember? The threads of their lives?”

He moved to each of the Winchesters, making sure they were all in deep slumber. Hopefully, he could take care of this before they all woke and realized the sort of predicament they were in. “Balthazar, you and Atropos watch over the camp until Abigael returns.”

While Balthazar made a salute with his right hand, Uzziel shook his head. “No. Jael and Atropos will stay. We may need Balthazar’s experience when we find the source of the magic. Jael will be of better use here.”

Jael made no argument, merely taking up a place opposite Atropos in the camp. 

Castiel, Balthazar, and Uzziel set out. The trail of magic was clear, much clearer than that vague scent they’d all noticed earlier. This trail led them to a clearing to the west, almost as if whoever it was wanted to be found. They emerged into it prepared to fight and found a short, squat creature waiting for them. Two small horns grew from his forehead and he appeared human to his legs, where a set of animal legs replaced human legs. He was lounging on the ground, a cushion beneath his head, empty food boxes and bags littering the ground. Beside him were three empty bottles of Dean’s favorite brand of beer.

In the clearing were also four beautiful, ethereal female creatures in filmy dresses. While they seemed human, they weren’t. Castiel could see the difference at a glance. Their features were too perfect to be human. One sat at the head of the male creature, running her fingers through his hair. The females giggled. The clearing smelled of wilderness and animal, an overpowering odor.

The male creature sat up with a delighted grin. “Welcome! I love guests! Chocolate bar, new friends?” He held out a container that read ‘chocolate for s’mores’ on a label in Jo’s handwriting and shook it. Castiel could see several chocolate bars still wrapped in the container. Here, apparently, was where their food had been going. The creature belched. “Excuse me.” He waved a hand. “Ladies, sing and dance for our guests.”

“That won’t be necessary,” Castiel told him.

“Of course it is. I’d be remiss as a host if I didn’t provide entertainment for my guests.” He got to his hooves and trotted to them. “Good evening, my name is Terius.” He bowed. “Satyr. Freshly in from overseas. These lovely ladies are my companions. Shira, Persa, Aminta, and Bronna. And you are?”

“Castiel, Uzziel, and Balthazar.”

“Such noble names!” He circled Castiel, sniffing at him with noisy snuffles. “Odd. You should be….” 

“Unconscious? Soul switched?”

Terius cleared his throat. “Bluntly, yes. May I ask what you are, sir?”

“We’re angels.”

“Angels?” He stroked his beard. “You look so human and yet upon closer examination, I see you are not. My mistake. Are you all angels? The two ladies as well?”

“We had a Fate with us.”

His eyes widened. “Oh. Oh dear. They gave us strict orders to never bother them…. I never actually met one, you understand. I was only born a millennium ago, but I do know we were never to bother them. Is she angry with me?”

“No. I don’t believe so.” Balthazar edged towards the bustiest of the companions. “Which one are you?”

She smiled and thrust her chest towards him. “Bronna.”

“Hello, Bronna. I’m Balthazar.”

Castiel quirked a brow. Did Balthazar really want to chance upsetting Atropos by flirting with another female? Perhaps he hadn’t thought that out? “You sent a spell at us. What was it exactly and how long will it last?”

Terius crossed his arms and peered at each of them in turn before replying. “Why? It didn’t affect you.”

“It affected humans in our charge,” Uzziel told him with a frown. “We take such matters seriously.”

“Humans. You mean the others that were here? The two families? They certainly didn’t need the enlightenment. Darling couples. Adorable children.”

“Elaborate,” Castiel ordered. “Enlightenment?”

The satyr returned to his cushion, sitting on it and reaching for the graham crackers. He munched on one, then spoke. “I watched you and the dark haired woman and the other angel and the blond. You all needed to see things from the other’s perspective.” He went on and on in that vein until Castiel finally cut him off.

“Enough. How long will it last?”

“Twelve hours. I went with the short one for you. I thought a taste was all you needed.”

“Will there be adverse side effects?”

“Shouldn’t be. There’ve never been before and I’ve used this spell many times over the centuries.”

“One of the women was pregnant. Will --”

“Then her mate will have a new understanding of what she goes through. I meant no ill-will. It’s a tool for learning and, if the couple is adventurous enough… _really_ learning about each other.” His expression turned lecherous and he waggled his brows.

Castiel strode around the clearing and stopped back where he’d started. “Balthazar, back away from the nymph, or whatever she technically is.” 

“I was merely chatting, Cassie.”

“Chat on your own time. Terius, you’ll be vacating this region. Uzziel, Balthazar, and a third angel will escort you to a better area, one you may be happier in.”

He snorted. “I’m happy here.”

“Trust me. You’re not. You see,” stepping to the satyr, Castiel crouched down, “our human friends are hunters. Do you know what hunters are? If you’re as old as you say, you should understand what I’m referring to.” 

“Hunters. Humans and sometimes other than humans with a knack for tracking down the different species of the supernatural community.” The satyr sobered. “Hunters are why I left the old country. Too many of them or the wannabes hanging around.” 

“Once that spell is over, they’ll be wanting blood.” He deliberately exaggerated in hopes of not having to wrestle this satyr to another location. It’d be better if he went voluntarily. “You won’t be safe here. We’ll relocate you to a place you will be safe as long as you don’t make an undue amount of mischief.”

Terius stared at him. Castiel could almost hear his thoughts. Finally, he nodded. “Very well. We accept your offer. Ladies? Pack our things. We leave for greener pastures.”

“Twelve hours,” he asked.

“Yes. No more, no less. They’ll be themselves again.”

In minutes, Jael was called to join them and Jael, Balthazar, and Uzziel left with the Satyr and his companions. Castiel returned to the Winchester camp.

Atropos was sitting in a chair holding a skunk on her lap and petting it like a cat. Her expression before she noticed him was surprisingly tender. Did she like animals? 

He cleared his throat. “A satyr moved in to the area. He was the one who cast the spell.”

“Impertinent creatures. Where is he now?”

“I sent Uzziel, Jael, and Balthazar to escort him and his companions to another area.”

Her eyes widened as she looked at him. “You left Balthazar with nymphs? Castiel. Are you _trying_ to break us up?”

“I wouldn’t do that. You and Balthazar’s relationship is your own matter and doesn’t concern me unless it gets in the way of all of our duties. Uzziel will keep him in line.”

“Doubtful. I’d better follow them. Make sure those creatures understand their place. The nymphs that favor satyrs will sex up anything remotely male given the chance. Here.” She got up and held out the skunk. “She wants to be cuddled. She’s missed having affection the past year.”

“Atrpos, I’m not going to cuddle a skunk.”

She set the creature down, giving it a last pat. “She’s not a skunk. She’s cursed.”

He looked at the skunk. It went to Jo and laid down beside her, curling up and sighing. “Cursed? You mean she’s really human?” It looked like a plain skunk to him, average in size. Was she joking? He hadn’t thought Atropos had a sense of humor, however she must since she was dating Balthazar.

“She was once. A rival cursed her and she’s going to stay a skunk until her rival secures the affections of the man they both wanted. Or her rival dies.”

“Atropos….”

“Threads, remember? I’m here for her rival.” 

“You’re on vacation.”

“Not exactly.” She adjusted her glasses. “I took three personal days because Balthazar didn’t want to suffer a full weekend with all of you, but as of midnight, I’m back on duty. I have a few minor things in the surrounding towns to attend to and her rival will be having an unfortunate accident due to her own negligence with the tools of her craft. At approximately eight in the morning, this animal will again be a woman, free to go home and live her life. Be kind to her, Castiel. Tell _them_ to be kind these next hours.” She half turned away. “And if you tell anyone I have a soft spot, I will get even.”

“I won’t mention it,” he promised.

She was gone then and he waited for the Winchester family to wake up. While he could keep them asleep for the entire twelve hours, he didn’t think it would be best. They needed to know what was going on and that the children were safe.

~~~~~~~~~~

Something was wrong.

Dean knew it the second he woke without even having to open his eyes. His stomach was upset and he felt weird. He analyzed that word ‘weird’ and stretched, realizing he was on the ground and his body definitely didn’t feel right. It felt strangely smaller. He groaned, the groan a higher sound than it should be, feminine even. Though he wanted to open his eyes, he couldn’t raise the energy and instead managed to put his hands to his face and rub it.

His skin was too smooth, soft, and was that long hair? Dean slid his hands down to his chest and stopped, squeezing the breasts he found there. “I have boobs. What the freakin’ hell happened?” The voice that came from his mouth was higher than his own and sounded rather like Jo.

“Hello, Dean.” Castiel’s voice was mildly amused.

“Cas? Why do I have boobs? And for that matter, why do I sound like Jo?” He forced his eyes open, a gargantuan feat in itself and turned his head. He was startled to see his own body on the ground a short ways away. If he was here, who was in his body? Sam? Gwen? Jo? A headache pounded at his temples.

“Because you are Jo. Temporarily.” Castiel was sitting in the chair across the fire, leaning forward with hands clasped loosely together. “Don’t panic.”

“Why? What happened?” Dean pushed himself up to sit, dislodging the skunk that had been curled against him. It got up, twitched it’s tail, and moved towards the tent Dean, Jo, and Jack had been using, disappearing into it. He supposed he should think of himself in terms of ‘her’ and ‘herself’ since he was in Jo’s body for some reason Cas had yet to explain, yet he couldn’t quite make himself. “Where’s Jack? And Sean?” He pushed Jo’s hair from his face.

“Safe. Let’s wait until the others are awake. I’d rather explain only once. It should only be a few minutes.”

He watched them wake up, one at a time. Sam, apparently in Gwen’s body, was second to wake, jerking awake. Sam got up from the chair, started to back away and tripped over it, barely managing to keep to Gwen’s feet. Her body slammed hard into a tree trunk and Dean winced. “Dude. Gwen’s body. Don’t think she’ll appreciate you slamming her into a tree.”

“I’m a girl. Why am I a girl, Cas?” Gwen’s eyes fastened on Dean in Jo’s body. “Jo? What’s going on? Why… Am I in Gwen’s body? I am, aren’t I? This is her voice.”

“Not Jo, Sam. Me, Dean, and it seems we’re them and they’re us.” He swallowed hard. His stomach just wasn’t settling down.

Sam sank down to sit on the ground. “This is weird. I feel weird, like I have a hangover.” He let out a slow breath. “I really hate body switching spells. Just so you know. They suck.”

Jo was next. She yawned, sat up, and frowned, observing her own body from inside Dean’s body. He waved at her. She turned her attention to Castiel. “Hallucination?”

“No.”

“Dream?”

“No.”

“Supernaturally created problem?”

“Yes.”

She sighed. “Crapsticks.”

Before she could say anything else, Gwen woke. She stretched and said, “I was having the strangest dream….” Her eyes popped opened. She looked down at herself. “Okay. Not a dream. I have guy parts.” She looked up. “Sam’s guy parts. Who here knows what’s going on?”

“We’re awake, Cas. Tell us all about it.” Dean got up from the ground and moaned as his stomach rebelled, hands resting there. “I think I’m gonna ralph.”

“Don’t stand up so fast,” Jo told him. “Just sit down and eat a couple saltines. You don’t want to move fast standing up from a chair, the ground, or getting out of bed. Baby doesn’t like it.”

“Mmm. A cracker ain’t gonna fix this. This is nausea on the projectile vomiting pea soup level. I think the camp is even spinning a little….” He took a deep breath and slowly let it out. The flip-flopping in his stomach suddenly ceased. “Wait. Never mind. I think it’s over.”

“That’s what _you_ think.” Jo got up from the ground, staggered a few seconds, and made her way to the food tubs. After a minute, she staggered back. Castiel stood and steadied her. “Here. Crackers.” She practically tossed the box at Dean and dropped into the nearest chair. “I’m so not used to seeing things from your height.”

Dean took the remaining chair, opened the crackers and took one out. “Go on, Cas.”

“Tell us you can fix this,” Sam said.

“Our kids?” Gwen asked. “Where are they?”

“Did Abby take them?” Jo looked worried. Dean recognized the expression on his own face.

With a long sigh, Castiel began to speak.

~~~~~~~~~~

Their reactions weren’t as bad as they would have been even a year earlier. Cas supposed they were all growing more jaded as time went on, taking strange events in stride. He glanced at each of them. “The children are fine. Jack and Sean are with Ellen and Bobby and the baby is healthy. The switch didn’t hurt your…” He stopped himself at the last second from giving away the sex. “The baby is well. As for your current places, it’s reversible.”

“How did it happen?” Gwen seemed uncomfortable in Sam’s body, shifting in the chair and moving constantly.

He tried to laugh. “Well, it’s sort of funny….” When no one seemed amused, he cleared his throat. “You’ll be back to normal in a few hours. Perhaps eight. The spell lasts for twelve and four have passed.”

“Who did we piss off,” Jo asked.

“What did we piss off,” Dean corrected. He seemed distracted by the fact that he had cleavage, adjusting Jo’s shirt every few seconds.

“Why do we always assume it’s us that pissed some one or thing off?” Gwen crossed Sam’s arms.

“Because that’s usually the case,” Sam replied from Gwen’s body, still over by the tree.

Castiel had to agree with Sam on that one. “It was an accident. The spell was actually meant for Balthazar and Atropos.” Castiel paused, then added, “And me and Abigael.”

Jo pursed Dean’s lips while Dean rolled her eyes and replied, “I guess the question really should be: who did you guys piss off?” He reached for the crackers.

“The local satyr.”

“The….” Gwen’s brows rose in an amused expression that was pure Sam. “Local satyr? Seriously?”

“There’s a local one,” Dean replied around a mouthful of crackers.

“We didn’t piss him off exactly.” Castiel found it amusing that, despite the four being in different bodies, he could easily tell who was who by how they spoke and moved. “He recently migrated to this area and due to Atropos and Balthazar’s somewhat tempestuous relationship and what he said was ‘unresolved sexual tension’ between myself and Abigael, he thought we’d be…enlightened were our souls to switch bodies for a few hours.”

“Didn’t he know three of you were angels and one a Fate?” Jo crossed Dean’s arms.

“He didn’t realize his spells don’t work on angels or Fates because he’d never met any. The spell bounced off of us and headed for the nearest two human couples.”

“Which would be us.” Gwen snorted. “Wonderful. Where’s the satyr now?”

He put his hands in his coat pockets. “Uzziel, Balthazar, and Jael are escorting him and his companions to a safer region.”

“Wonderful.” Sam leaned forward. “So, eight more hours of this.”

“You’ll be yourselves again later tonight.” He studied them. “Now that you’re awake, I really should check in with Abigael, then with Uzziel on the relocation effort. I’ll return shortly. I suggest you rest.”

“Rest?” Gwen pushed Sam’s body to stand and immediately thrust his arms out like she was afraid she’d fall over. “How are we supposed to rest? We’re not ourselves. I don’t know about everyone else, but…body switching? It’s --”

“Reversible and Castiel said it’ll only be a few more hours.” Sam got to Gwen’s feet and approached. “We’ll be okay, Gwen. It’s weird, but I got through it once before, we can all get through eight hours.”

“Once before?”

While Sam explained, Castiel slipped away. 


	10. Chapter 10

Castiel had been gone for nearly an hour and Jo wondered how long it was going to take for him to check on everything.

She squinted at the fire. “You are so getting your eyes checked when we get back.” Her pronouncement made Dean snort, but she wasn’t kidding. Since she was literally seeing through his eyes, she could tell just how bad his eyesight was getting. He definitely needed reading glasses. “And for the fiftieth time, stop it.” Jo was having a difficult time getting used to her words coming out with Dean’s voice. The surreal aspect of this was giving her a headache. Giving Dean’s body a headache, rather.

“Stop what?”

She gestured over at her body and what he was doing while in her body. “Stop feeling me up.”

He paused, looking over at her. “Technically, I’m feeling myself up since I’m in here and you’re over there in me.” He smiled. “Man, that sounds dirty. You in me.”

That response was so him, too. She rolled his eyes. “That is so wrong.”

He shrugged her brows at her with a lecherous grin that seemed somewhat off on her face. “And yet so right at the same time.” Holding out the neckline of her shirt, he looked down. “I don’t know how you get anything done with these. I’d spend all day playing with them.”

“Oh, geez, Dean,” came Gwen’s voice with Sam’s inflections. “Will you stop that already? You don’t see me doing that to Gwen’s body.”

“You’re tempted though. Admit it.”

Sam shifted uncomfortably in the chair. “Maybe, but I’m not actually doing it.”

Dean let go of the shirt and smirked as Gwen returned to the camp. He smirked. “So, Jamie Lee, how’d the peeing go? Everything come out okay?”

“Shut up, Dean.” Gwen eased Sam’s tall frame into a chair. “I always thought peeing in the woods would be easier as a guy and you know what? It is. So much easier. Cas back yet?”

“Nope.” He stretched Jo’s legs out. “I think being a chick for a few hours could be totally awesome. We should enjoy this.” He shot another lecherous glance Jo’s way. “Come here often, sailor?” He made a clicking noise with her mouth.

Jo scowled. “There’s weird and then there’s weird on a level I don’t want to mess with. This is the latter weird.”

“Oh come on. It’s an adventure. We haven’t done a full body switch yet. Could be fun to, uh, check each other out.” The last words were said in a coaxing tone.

“Yeah, an adventure. And,” she drew the word out, “how well do our adventures usually end? Think about that a minute.”

The grin faded as he was likely remembering the various mishaps that tended to accompany their sexual adventures. Sam and Gwen catching them in costume. Sam and Gwen catching them going at it in the Impala in their own driveway. Sam and Gwen…. “Okay, you have a point. But hey, we don’t have to worry about them walking in since they’re sitting right here. They’ll know to skedaddle for awhile. Why don’t you two go take a nature hike or something for an hour or two? Maybe three.”

Sam stared at him with Gwen’s annoyed stare. “Dude, what’s wrong with you?”

Dean sighed. “I don’t know. I feel all…tingly and frisky. Playful. Sort of how I’ve always imagined the women in those nudie mags are feeling. Is this what it’s like being a girl? It’s sort of fun feeling this way. I could dig feeling like this all the time.”

Jo closed Dean's eyes for a few seconds and reopened them. “Actually, it’s the hormones. The pregnancy ones. That happens every so often.”

Gwen’s snicker came from Sam’s lips. “That figures.”

“Dean, you’ll just to have to imagine what it would be like, because I’m not doing that. I’d like to keep how things are from your side a mystery.” Jo crossed his arms and waited for the inevitable fast talking he was going to do to try to convince her to have some together time in their tent.

~~~~~~~~~~

No way was Sam going to admit that he really did want to feel himself up just to see what it felt like for Gwen. It was one of those things he didn’t think should be talked about, so of course Dean kept bringing the conversation back to the topic. Dean’s words and way of speaking out of Jo’s mouth made him smile a little though. This was a glimpse of sorts to how Dean would be as a woman he supposed.

He watched Gwen return and was a little sorry she’d had to deal with peeing so soon after waking this way. While Dean continued to try to get Jo to go experiment in the tent with him, Sam leaned closer to Gwen. She still seemed uncomfortable in his body, but not as much as she had earlier. “You wrote your name in pee, didn’t you?”

She froze and avoided his gaze, pursing his lips before saying in a nonchalant tone, “Why would you think that?”

“Because every guy does that at least once in his life just because he can.”

“Oh. I didn’t know that.”

“How are you holding up?”

“Kind of freaked out to be honest.”

“Yeah, it does that. At least we’re not in the middle of a case and can ride it out.”

“True. Silver lining, I guess. I can’t seem to get used to it. You know, I was waiting for something strange to happen. We can’t ever take vacations without something going wrong.”

He smiled. “That’s our lives. You think Dean’ll convince her?”

“No. I don’t think he can wear her down on that one.”

“He’s already wearing her.”

Gwen chuckled softly. “True. Definitely true.”

Reaching out, he took his hand in hers. It felt different, the slight roughness of his hands against the smoother skin of hers. She usually slathered on lotion a couple times a day and feeling that difference from her view was kind of nice, as was seeing himself out of her eyes. It really was enlightening in a way. The way her body reacted when he made it move was different than the way his own body reacted. There was a grace to her movements that he knew he didn’t have.

Leaning over further, he whispered. “We’ll get through this. Relax. It’s a few more hours.”

“Trying.”

“You could always go to sleep. Sleep it off.”

“Not tired yet, but I think I would if I could.”

He experimented with posture and sitting until he found a comfortable position (leaning slightly towards Gwen with one leg crossed over the other) and watched Dean and Jo. She got up and walked around the camp, looking like she was practicing keeping her balance. Slowly, she seemed to get the hang of Dean’s body, her movements more easy and fluid.

“You guys should get up and walk around,” she said. “It helps.”

“I will.” Sam swung one foot. “In a bit.”

“I got up already, staggered down the path. I’m good.” Gwen released her hands and crossed Sam’s arms.

“I’d get up, but I’m sort of feeling sick again.” Dean bent over, head between Jo’s knees. “I think I need to lie down.”

Jo retrieved a sleeping bag and laid it out. “There you go. Move slowly.” With a grin, she stood and reached up, touching the branch above Dean’s head. “Hey, Gwen, look at this. I can touch the tree.”

“Cool. I could probably touch higher.”

She eyed Sam’s body and pursed Dean’s lips a long moment. “Yeah, Sam’s taller and his arms are longer. You’re probably right. Still, I can’t do this is my body, I’m not tall enough. I wonder what else I can do?”

Sam shook Gwen’s head and laughed. Jo appeared to be getting into being in Dean’s body. He wondered how long _that_ would last.

~~~~~~~~~~

While part of Dean had always been curious what it was like to be a girl, this was becoming more real than he cared for. Pregnancy hormones making him feel revved up was one thing. Watching Jo, in his body, and being turned on by that was another, resulting in him looking away and repeating to himself softly, “I just did not get hot for my own body.” Which he totally had, but maybe it wasn’t that exactly, but rather his attraction to Jo rearing up.

He wanted to ask if she was having that same issue and decided now wasn’t the perfect moment to ask if his body was getting boner when Jo looked at him in her body. An intriguing line of thought however. Did that mean their sexual attraction was no longer a simple physical one, but also on a soul level too? Or did it point to the soul being what really attracted in the end? Maybe it was Jo’s body displaying her attraction to his body. Or maybe….

Thinking about it was going to give him a headache.

Not to mention the baby was making him feel sick again.

He hated that he’d doubted Jo on the strength of her nausea even once. Taking slow breaths, Dean rested Jo’s hands on her stomach. As bad as this was, it reminded him there was a baby in there, her body reacting to it. He almost wished she was further along and he could feel the baby kick from her perspective. It had to be an awesome sensation.

Slowly, he stretched out on the sleeping bag she’d brought out for him, easing into the only position that stopped the nausea: flat on her back. When she’d finished touching all the tree branches in reach, he asked, “How do you deal with this, Jo? Feeling sick?”

“It’s all part of the experience and it wasn’t that bad with Jack. Honestly, it’s the worst when food is cooking.”

“I hate this feeling.”

“Me, too.” She knelt and leaned down, voice lowering to a whisper. “But the payoff is going to be awesome. Another little baby. A brother or sister for Jack. I think about that and it’s okay.” She brushed his fingers across her forehead and sat back. “Rest.”

He tried to take that advice because the sooner the nausea went away, the better.

~~~~~~~~~~

There was a physical strength that Jo could feel in Dean’s body that she herself didn’t have and she kind of wanted to explore that a little. She wasn’t ready for any sexual moves like this, and thought it’d take more than a few hours to get to that point, but she had the urge to run down the path to see how much faster his body could move, or pick up something heavy to see how easier it was. The only thing that stopped her was that everyone else seemed to be hating this switch.

Dean was spending most of the time so far either feeling sick or aroused, Gwen refused to get up unless she had to, and Sam was tolerating the time. No one else wanted to see what a different body could really do. Granted, Sam had been body switched before, but that was into another guy. Women were different. Were they not curious at all? Jo was. She even thought about digging a hole to see how long it took before Dean’s body got winded.

Why were they not more into this experience? Maybe if Dean wasn’t having pregnancy problems he would, but she’d have thought Gwen would be curious about what Sam’s body was capable of. After all, Jo knew he strong enough that just a tiny tug could make her spin around. And that had been years ago before she’d met back up with Ellen. He was even stronger now.

At a loss as to what to do when no one else wanted to do anything, she rubbed a hand across Dean’s stomach. There was some definite growling going on. Hunger in his body felt different, more insistent than what she felt in hers. “Anyone else hungry?”

“I could eat,” Gwen replied, “but don’t ask me to help. I can’t quite get the hang of Sam’s body. I’d probably trip and fall into the fire.”

Sounded like an excuse to Jo. If Gwen got up and moved around it’d become easier and she wouldn’t have that problem. She just didn’t want to.

Sam got up. “I’ll help.”

Dean swallowed hard. “Nausea sucks.” He clutched Jo’s stomach and rolled onto her side. “I actually thought you were exaggerating a couple times. Man, Jo, I’m sorry. This sucks.”

“You shouldn’t have scarfed down all the crackers at once,” she murmured to herself, then raised her voice. “Shallow breaths, Dean. Remember? Think of the payoff.” Going to the cooler, she crouched down and looked through it. Usually, her tolerance for hamburgers was one meal a week at most, but she could do with a burger again already. “We have any hamburgers left? A burger sounds really good right now.”

“No,” was Sam’s distracted reply as he stood beside her. “Why does my back hurt? It didn’t hurt a minute ago. Gwen, did you pull a muscle?” 

“Maybe you did when you tripped and slammed her into the tree after you woke.” Dean stretched out again.

“Doesn’t feel like a pulled muscle exactly…. It’s like it’s deeper.”

One hand kneaded Gwen’s lower back and Jo did a quick mental count to the last time Gwen had complained about a backache. Yup, just about a month back. Her glance found Gwen, who made a faint smile with Sam’s lips.

“Take a Pamprin, Sam. In the side pocket of my bag.”

“Pamprin.” He turned her head. The look in Gwen’s eyes indicated Sam was afraid where this was going. “You’re not PMS-ing. You told Dean you weren’t when we were talking about chocolate.”

“PMS was last week while you two were gone. I get backache and cramps during. It’s a special time of the month.”

“How did I not know that?”

“You tend to tune out on the subject.”

“But you weren’t when we got back.”

“There’s about a two day reprieve of symptoms and then…yeah.”

With a snicker, Dean raised up onto Jo’s elbows. “Dude, you’re ragging. Better you than me.” His grin faded. “I really didn’t need to know that, Gwen.”

“Sure you did, Dean.” Her faint smile grew into a grin. “Girls talk about that stuff. You’re a girl now. You get to talk about it.”

“That’s just gross. Chicks talk about it? Seriously?”

Jo nodded. “Yes. It’s a girl thing. Bitching about how your PMS is worse than your friend’s PMS is like a rite of passage. So is bitching about the week itself. Comparing symptoms, discussing how a heavy flow makes you feel tired.”

She watched her lips twist in a disgusted grimace. “Oh, that’s twisted.”

“No worse than things you guys do.”

“Name something,” Dean challenged.

“Farting contests. Trying to light them on fire.”

There was a faintly ill expression on Gwen’s face. “I can’t do this. Not…that.”

“Sure you can, Sam.” Gwen looked amused by Dean and Sam’s reaction, the grin remaining on Sam’s face. “I do it every month. Jo does. Ellen did. Every woman goes through it and, face it, you’re a girl for a few hours so you do it, too.”

“Glad I dodged that bullet,” Dean murmured. “Ohh, thank God. Nausea is going away again. Ahh, relief.”

“It’s a fact of life.” Jo dug deeper in the cooler. “Are hotdogs all we have left?”

“There might be some brats.” Sam went to the tent he and Gwen shared and opened the flap. Jo heard the rattle of a pill bottle.

With a sigh, she reached for the salad fixings. Opening the baggie of pepper strips (her favorite snack lately), she drew out a strip and took a bite. The texture felt strange in Dean’s mouth, not what she was used to. It only took a couple seconds for the yucky metallic taste to hit her. Grabbing for a paper towel, she spit out the pepper. Gross. It was nasty. She held up the baggie and peered at the strips. They didn’t look like they were going bad, yet by the taste, they were definitely starting to turn.

“What’s wrong,” Gwen asked.

“The peppers taste gross. I think they went bad.”

“Can’t have. It’s too fast. Let me see.” Gwen ate one, Sam’s shoulders lifting in a shrug. “Tastes fine to me. Sam?”

He tasted one and affirmed they were fine.

Jo moved to where Dean lay and held out the baggie. “Taste.”

“Nope. Peppers are nasty. I’ve told you before and I’m saying it again. I don’t eat those things for a reason and it’s not because I’m picky.”

“One bite,” she insisted.

Reluctantly, and with a put-upon sigh, Dean took an orange pepper strip and bit into it. A surprised gleam rose in Jo’s eyes as he sat up and finished the strip. “That actually tasted kind of sweet.” He tugged the baggie from her hands and reached for another one. “Not bad.”

A theory beginning to form, Jo returned to the cooler and began testing her theory by tasting all the salad fixings that Dean wouldn’t eat. Carrots were like wood chips, cucumbers had a bitter taste, and the beets Gwen liked made Jo gag from the chalky aftertaste. The lettuce, tomato, and scallions were okay, however. She sat back onto the ground. Her glance found Dean. 

He was finishing off the last of the strips, obviously surprised he could get them down. “These are surprisingly tasty. I had no idea.”

“It’s not that you don’t want to eat vegetables at all. You physically can’t.” She couldn’t help the tiny bit of wonder that tinged the words. It had never occurred to her that there could be a physical reason as to why Dean avoided eating most vegetables and was adamant they were mostly disgusting. It was because, to him, they _were_ disgusting. He couldn’t taste them the way Jo, Sam, and Gwen did.

“I’ve tried to tell you. Asparagus and brussel sprouts make me gag, squash is like this sandy texture, peas and lima beans are rocks, and broccoli can be choked down by drowning it in butter and salt, cheese sauce, or any kind of sauce really. Lettuce is okay. Pickles, tomato, any kind of onion I can eat. Corn, potato, green beans. Spinach is tolerable as long as it’s canned and cooked in vinegar. The fresh stuff is gross. Cauliflower is like broccoli. Okay in sauces. Carrots have to be cooked.”

Gwen’s mouth opened and Sam shook her head. “You never actually said why you refuse to eat most vegetables. I always assumed dad never made you eat them.”

“Dad never liked many vegetables either. You were the anomaly, Sam. You like all those things and you always ate them. Maybe mom did, too. I don’t remember, but I do remember dad never had to tell you to eat your veggies. You ate them voluntarily.”

Jo thought back to whenever they’d had Chinese food. Dean did tend to go with dishes that were meat heavy and for anything heavily fried, though he ate water chestnuts and snow peas without behaving like he was being tortured. “I never realized.”

“I know.” He finished the last pepper strip. “You’ve been trying so hard to get Jack to eat right, the least I can do is make myself eat some of it so he’ll try it.”

Usually mixed with something else. Peas mashed into the potatoes and gravy and that sort of thing. “I thought you were just being picky and dramatic.”

He shrugged like it was no big deal. “Now you know.”

“Dean, I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay, Jo. Not like I’m starving. I get plenty to eat.” He pointed at the cooler. “If we’re out, call Abby or Cas. They had burgers. They’ll probably let us take their food seeing as how they don’t normally eat.”

Jo slowly put the vegetables away and, in perfect timing, Castiel returned.


	11. Chapter 11

They were holding up well Castiel decided as he returned with the cooler from the angel camp and a bag of other items he’d picked up for them.

“Since the Satyr took your food, I’ve replaced it. Crackers, graham crackers, chocolate bars, marshmallows and a few other items. You may, of course, use the food Uzziel insisted we had to have. Hamburgers are in the cooler and there should be fresh buns as well. Abigael is making sure your containers are washed, dried, and put away back at the house.”

“Thanks.” Jo smiled. The softness of the smile looked strange on Dean’s face. “I could kiss you, Castiel.”

He took a step back. “I’d rather you didn’t.”

“The food is a nice gesture, Cas,” Dean said as he slowly moved from the ground to a standing position. He adjusted Jo’s shirt across her breasts. Castiel thought he heard some of the stitches along the neckline rip open. “I’m not hungry now.”

“Of course you’re not hungry.” Sam snorted. “You ate three sleeves of crackers in less than five minutes and an entire baggie of pepper strips. You’ll probably have indigestion soon. Besides, Jo’s stomach isn’t bottomless like yours is. She knows when to stop.”

“I know when to stop.”

“Really? May I remind you of the incident just last week when you ate so many doughnuts you made yourself sick?”

He jabbed one finger at Sam. “They were Krispy Kreme. Those things are like air. And I didn’t actually get sick.”

“No, you only moaned you were going to for an hour.”

“Where’s the skunk?” Castiel paced the camp and didn’t see it. The things Atropos had told him came back to him and he thought he should find the skunk and give her some affection.

“In the tent.” Dean gestured towards it and continued his argument with Sam.

Castiel went to the tent, flipped the flap back, crouched down, and leaned in. The skunk was curled up on the sleeping bags, it’s eyes open, watching him. “Hello.” He felt a little silly talking to it, but reasoned that he shouldn’t feel too silly considering Atropos had been practically cooing at it in baby talk. “You should have no fear of me. I’m an angel.”

It stretched and stood.

“Come here please. I won’t hurt you. I’ll make sure they don’t as well.”

Slowly, it moved towards him. Castiel picked it up and stood. It sighed and settled down in his arms as though it trusted him. He turned back to the camp to find everyone watching him.

“Cas, why are you picking up skunks?” Dean sat in the chair beside Gwen. His posture was decidedly non-feminine and more appropriate for his own body than Jo’s: legs splayed out and body slumped. Castiel had observed that even when Jo slouched, she managed to do so with grace and usually crossed her legs when sitting. Not so Dean. He was sitting like he usually did.

“It’s one skunk, singular, and she isn’t a skunk. At least according to Atropos she isn’t.” He moved to stand between Dean and Gwen’s chairs. Gwen was doing a fair impression of how men sat, or perhaps she was too scared to move much. She didn’t outwardly appear to be as terrified of this as she actually was inside, hiding it well from the others. He could see it however, the fear she displayed in Sam’s eyes and in the set of his shoulders. She was the one taking the switch the hardest and he found that strange. He’d thought she’d take it in stride like everything else, but this seemed to touch a nerve of some sort. He wondered why. “The animal is really a woman suffering from a curse put upon her by a rival.”

“Witches, right?” Sam began laying out plates and utensils on the table. “They seem to follow us around these days. We’re practically tripping over them.”

“The rival is the only witch and they’ve always been prevalent, Sam. You never noticed before because most keep a rather low profile. The trouble with Mia put them on your minds. You notice them more since she was quite relevant to your lives for several months. Years in Gwen’s case.” He watched them all and when he looked at Dean, he was unable to keep his amusement from showing. A smile tugged at his lips and he let it blossom. Showing how he was feeling was slowly becoming easier as time passed.

“What’re _you_ finding so funny?” Dean turned Jo’s head to look at him.

“You as a woman is an intriguing transformation, Dean. It fairly boggles the mind.”

“What’s that supposed to mean? Are you saying I’m not feminine enough? Because all the parts are here. All the goodies.” He pressed Jo’s hands to her chest. “Look at these boobs. They’re awesome. _And_ ,” one hand slid down to pat Jo’s stomach, “I’ve got a bun in the oven. That’s as girly as girly gets. I’m totally feminine.”

Gwen laughed at that. “I think he means it’s hard to see you as a girl because you’re such a guy usually. A man’s man.”

“I can be girly,” he argued, but ruined it with a belch that was far from dainty. “Excuse me. Pepper strips. And they tasted good going down, too.”

“Dean.” Jo looked up from her preparations for cooking. “A little decorum.”

He spread his arms. “How am I not the picture of ladylike values?”

Sam flicked one of Gwen’s fingers his direction. “Well, for one thing, I never see Jo sitting like that.”

“Like what?”

“Dean, look at yourself. If Jo was wearing a skirt, you’d be flashing panties to the rest of us.”

He looked, then slowly scooted up and crossed Jo’s legs. “I should hope you don’t see her all spread-eagled like that. I’d have to kick your ass.”

“Dean.”

“Okay, okay. What else? Describe to me the ways I’m not being girly enough to be a girl when I obviously am one right now?”

Jo snorted and began to lay burgers on the grill over the fire. “Talking, moving, walking like a guy.” She paused and poked the fire with a stick, then added some smaller twigs.

“You can do better as a guy than I can as a girl?”

Castiel scratched the skunk under her chin. She seemed to like that, her body relaxing further in his arms. If she was a cat, she’d be purring.

“Didn’t say that, but sweetheart, you know how I move, talk, and so on. Do that. Girly in a second.”

Dean’s nod was slow and thoughtful. “So…I should swish the hips, shake the boobs, and do that come-hither breathy voice you do?”

Jo frowned. “I don’t do that. Geez, you make me sound like Marilyn Monroe.”

“You definitely do that,” he replied. “You’re always swishing the hips, shaking the boobs, and come-hithering. Sometimes you even arch your back, really get the cleavage on display.”

She directed her attention to the rest of them. “Do I do that?”

Sam’s reply was a slow, “Yeah…you kind of do whenever you and Dean are in the same room --”

“Or just talking on the phone,” Gwen finished for him.

Castiel nodded. “It’s a natural reaction to your chosen mate. If it makes you feel better, Jo, Gwen also displays such mannerisms with Sam.”

“I what?” Now Gwen frowned. “No, I don’t.”

Dean and Jo’s brows both rose and Jo swirled one of Dean’s fingers in the air. “You twirl your hair around a finger and bite your lower lip.”

“Don’t forget the blushing,” Dean added.

“And you do the come-hither voice, too.” Sam cast a side-long glance at Gwen. “All husky and….” He cleared her throat and licked her lips. “Anyway, I’m sure I do things, too. Dean does things with Jo.”

“Like what,” Dean demanded. He again adjusted her shirt and grinned down at the cleavage he managed to display. At the rate he was going, the neckline of Jo’s shirt would be stretched too far to shrink back upon washing. Castiel thought he heard more stitches ripping open.

With a last pat, Castiel set the skunk down. She laid at his feet. “You stand up straighter, lower the pitch of your voice a fraction, and you have a tendency to, on average, touch her about every twenty seconds if you’re beside her. Usually on the arm, hand, or back, yet occasionally, you will sneak a touch to her breasts if you think no one is looking. You also watch her when you think no one’s looking and thoroughly ogle her,“ he raised his brows, “parts. You --”

“Thanks, Cas. I get it. I’m a lech.”

He shrugged. “You’re a husband. Lechery towards your wife is implied and expected.”

“Sure. Now dissect Sam since the rest of us are naked. What does he do?”

“Sam’s responses to Gwen are similar in some areas such as touching and watching, but he doesn’t lower his pitch. His tone softens.” Castiel shook his head. “While similar, all of your responses are unique to yourselves and your relationships.”

Conversation veered off in another direction and he glanced at Jo. She stared at him, then did an eye roll to the table beside her. A moment later she did it again. At the fifth eye roll, and her slightly annoyed expression as she did it, he finally understood that she wanted him to join her at the table. He moved to stand beside her. “Yes, Jo?”

She turned Dean’s back to the group. “Lower your voice.”

“Yes, Jo,” he repeated the question in the whisper she wanted.

“Is there anything you can do for Dean?”

“Do?”

“The nausea. I don’t want him to think it’s like that all the time.”

“But it has been recently.” Abigael had filled him in with much unnecessary detail regarding the details of Jo’s second pregnancy one afternoon when he’d been trying to complete paperwork. While he’d known heaven had paperwork, the sheer amount was staggering and Abigael had deliberately interrupted him, something about water coolers and office bonding. How the inner workings of Jo’s body and her pregnancy connected with office bonding he didn’t know.

“Yeah, but he doesn’t need to know that. Besides, Abby said it’s going to stop soon. There’s no reason for Dean to go through much more of it.”

“That’s like lying. Aren’t you already lying to him about your camping competence?”

She shot an annoyed glance at him. As he was quite familiar with both Dean’s annoyed expression and approximately how long it took for Jo to go from annoyance to speaking, he waited for an actual verbal response. “I’m not lying about that. I simply didn’t disabuse Dean of his thoroughly wrong notion. Okay? Okay. Now, you’re familiar with Dean’s tendency to feel guilty about everything, right? Especially those things he can’t control?”

“Yes, of course. I have years of experience regarding Dean’s feelings and the rationale for his feelings.”

“Then think about this situation a minute. How much longer do you think there is before he starts feeling guilty about wanting another baby because I’ve got a touch of perfectly normal morning sickness?”

Castiel blinked twice. He had to concede on that point and concur with her assessment. Dean would certainly take that onto himself and manage to accrue a large amount of guilt over Jo’s temporary physical discomfort. “I’ll ease it for a few hours.”

“Can you make it twelve? I’d like to get back to the house without wanting to toss cookies.”

“Why would you want to throw cookies,” he asked, even as he remembered the expression referred to vomiting. “I withdraw the question. I’ll take care of it.” He couldn’t exactly put a time limit on it, but he could come back later and check.

“Thanks. Think you could talk to Gwen, too? I don’t know what’s wrong with her. She won’t move from that chair and I think if she’d get up and try she’d see this really isn’t so bad.”

He studied Jo a minute. For a woman who freely admitted she liked what Dean called girly stuff, she was liking this look into men quite a bit. “You’re enjoying yourself.”

“Is it too obvious? Because I think I’m the only one.” She stepped over and flipped the burgers, then came back. “I want to do things, see what I can do as Dean that I can’t as myself, like reaching tree branches. Gwen won’t even try. It’s like she’s afraid of this even though it’s temporary. I don’t get it. It’s not permanent. Check out the guy side.”

“I’m glad you’re adjusting.”

“I even want to belch to see how it sounds.”

“You’ve heard Dean belch before. I’m certain the sound hasn’t changed.”

“You’re missing the point, Cas.”

“I sometimes do,” he admitted slowly. He’d come a long way in that regard, yet still had problems on occasion.

“Point is, my husband is kind of cool and getting to see and do things as him is kind of fun. How often do women ever get to check out their husband’s point of view like this? Or men a woman’s? Like that Mel Gibson movie where he could read women’s minds, only this is a body thing.”

“I’m unfamiliar with that movie.”

“I know. I’m thinking about telling Uzziel to initiate a movie night for you guys. Don’t worry. I’ll give him a comprehensive list that Dean, Gwen, Sam, and I have compiled. Mom’ll probably have some suggestions, too. And Bobby. Possibly Jodie.”

He thanked her even though he thought it was a terrible idea and, after the four were done eating, went to crouch down beside Dean.

~~~~~~~~~~

Dean glanced at Castiel as the angel joined him at the sleeping bag and laid a hand on one of Jo’s shoulders. “Hey Cas.”

“How are you holding up?” He released Jo’s shoulder. “Is her pregnancy giving you trouble?”

“I’m sorry Jo’s had to go through this nausea. It’s rough.”

“It’s a natural part of the process. Most women have some morning sickness at some point.”

“I know. She had it with Jack, too. I hadn’t realized what it was really like. I thought it was like when you have the flu, but it isn’t. With the flu, you get it all up and you feel better and this, it’s like…. You want to throw up, feel like you have to, and don’t ever really do. Or it suddenly goes away mid dry heave. Hers does anyway.” Sighing, he leaned back on Jo’s hands, studying everyone else.

Sam, having taken a Pamprin before dinner, was passed out in one chair, sprawled with Gwen’s head leaned back and her mouth open. Dean vaguely recalled Gwen falling asleep fast a few times when they were all watching a movie. She’d close her eyes and be asleep in seconds. Now he wondered if those moments had been because of Pamprin, because it was the same thing here he’d seen back at the house. One minute awake, the next asleep.

Jo had started cleaning up after their dinner. He planned to discuss her surprisingly good camping skills later. She kept yawning and he glanced at Jo’s watch, squinting at it. It was about the time he started feeling tired every night now. He’d frequently reflected both mentally and verbally that getting older sucked. Needing an earlier bedtime was a part of that.

As for Gwen, she was wide awake. Sam didn’t sleep as much as the rest of them, though he was sleeping more than he had after getting his soul back. Gwen was going to be the last one to go to bed. He peered closer at her. When she thought they weren’t looking at her, Dean could see fear flicker across Sam’s face and he wondered why she was afraid.

He shifted on the sleeping bag and returned his attention to Castiel, keeping his voice low. “Hey, do you think you can keep my back from doing any twinges for Jo? I sort of never told her I got thrown against a wall when Sam and I were out last week.”

“Dean.” Castiel’s voice held exasperation, his gaze mildly chiding. “You should have told her.”

“Sam said that, too.” He knew he should have told her. He didn’t really need Sam and Castiel telling him that. Jo worried about his back though and she was afraid he was going to have bad trouble with it in a few years. It was probably true, but he’d yet to figure out how to avoid hurting his back in a fight. It sort of just happened. He’d be fighting and then suddenly airborne.

“Sam gave you wise advice.”

“So…. No to blasting any twinges away before they happen?”

Castiel didn’t answer the question, standing and moving over to talk to Gwen. That was as much of an answer as he knew he’d get.

Jo finished cleaning up and sat down on the sleeping bag, Dean’s legs stretched out.

Dean laid down, placing Jo’s head against his leg, and enjoyed the warmth of the fire and the fact that he could glance down and see cleavage while they talked.

~~~~~~~~~

Castiel didn’t bother to answer Dean’s query. Dean knew very well he couldn’t take care of any twinges. He approached Gwen and pulled up the chair Dean had been sitting in earlier. “Hello, Gwen.”

“Hi.” Sam’s voice was hesitant and, after approximately seventy-eight and three-fourths of a second, Gwen pulled Sam’s jacket tighter. “I hate to ask and you know I don’t ever ask you for anything unless I have to….”

“Go on.”

She cast a glance at Sam. “Could you ease my backache and cramps for Sam?”

He blinked, suppressing a sigh. “He’s taken the medication both you and Jo use.”

“I don’t want him to think that being a girl is always sucky. It’s only sucky like five days a month or so and I had a hunch it was going to be a tough month yesterday.”

“He’s well medicated, Gwen. You needn’t worry. I believe Sam will realize it’s not always like this.”

“You’re sure?”

“Yes.”

She shrugged. “Then I guess I don’t need anything after all. Thanks though. I appreciate you asking.”

He was just about to stand and move to wake Sam and speak to him when Gwen grabbed his arm.

“Hey, I thought of something.” She motioned him close.

“Yes, Gwen?”

“Maybe you could ease the morning sickness for Dean a little. That’d be good. He so doesn’t need anything else to try and feel guilty about.”

“I’ll take care of it.”

“Thanks.” Gwen looked at the fire.

Castiel was silent for nearly two minutes before he decided to address the issue of her fear. “You have no reason to fear these hours.”

“Not talking about it, Castiel.” She jiggled one of Sam’s feet.

“It could make you feel better to confide in a friend.”

“No.” She crossed Sam’s arms. His jaw was beginning to set into a stubborn expression.

“Whatever occurred in your past to make you fear this --”

“Stop.” Reaching out, she yanked on his tie, pulling him close once more, Sam’s mouth was right against his ear, voice an annoyed whisper. “I said I’m not talking about this. Stop trying to get me to. Geez. You and Jo both. I’m not getting up and walking around, I’m not trying to get used to this, and I’m not talking about any of it. Just. Stop. Got it?”

“Yes.” When she released him, he smoothed his tie back down, stood, grasped the chair and moved it over by Sam. Castiel sat, then gently shook Gwen’s shoulder to rouse Sam.

Her eyes opened, Sam blinking sleepily. “Cas. You’re still here?”

“I’ll remain close until the spell lifts.”

“That’s nice of you.”

“Is there anything you need?” He waited for a request of any kind.

Sam thought a minute. “Not sure…. Having trouble concentrating. Head feels all fuzzy.”

“Nothing you wish me to take care of?”

Gwen’s tongue caught between her teeth, her brow furrowing as Sam tried to concentrate. “No?”

“No ache or pain in your body you don’t wish Gwen to suffer?”

Her eyes narrowed slightly. “No. Dean was the one who got hurt last week. Why? Do you know something I don’t?”

“No. Simply checking.”

“Oh. Well…. You could get rid of the morning sickness for Dean.” 

Castiel found it amusing that Jo, Sam, and Gwen all asked for the morning sickness to be taken away. They did know Dean well. 

Sam pointed a finger at Castiel. “That’s what you can do, because I really don’t want to hear his guilty lamenting over her pregnancy for the next few months and how it sucks and he’s a horrible husband for wanting another baby.” He rolled Gwen’s head against the back of the chair. As he spoke, Gwen’s voice became agitated, volume rising. “He’ll go on and on and you know Dean, Castiel. If he’s not feeling guilty about something, he’s not being Dean, but I don’t want to have to listen to him feel guilty about something he and Jo decided together. They made that decision together. I heard them. We all heard them talking about it. She was there, too. She said yes. She didn’t have to, but that won’t matter to Dean’s guilty conscience.”

Luckily, Dean and Jo appeared to be having an intense conversation about something and were ignoring them.

“Sam,” came Sam’s voice in a hiss. Gwen dug in Sam’s jacket pocket a second and tossed something towards them. “Eat the chocolate, shut up, and stop talking so loud. You’re having a mood swing.”

He rolled Gwen’s eyes and sighed. “Is that what this is? I feel annoyed all of a sudden and want to punch something.”

“Eat the chocolate. Trust me. Eat the chocolate and take another nap.”

He opened the wrapper and took a bite. When it had been swallowed, he shrugged. “That’s it, Castiel. Just…that, the morning sickness if you could.” He shoved the rest of the chocolate into Gwen’s mouth and mumbled something that sounded rather like, “Man, I want to just rip these ovaries out.” One hand rubbed across Gwen’s stomach.

Castiel shook his head. “I’m sorry, Sam. You want to what?”

“I know that feeling well,” Gwen told Sam. “Some months are worse than others.”

“I don’t think one pill is working. Should I take another, because I want to reach in and rip them out to feel better.”

Castiel shared a long glance with Gwen, then reached out, gently touched Gwen’s arm and asked, “Would you like me to bring you more chocolate,” while easing the symptoms for Sam.

Of course, Balthazar chose that moment to make a sudden appearance.


	12. Chapter 12

Jo had been giving herself away and didn’t seem to realize it. Gwen had watched her cook burgers, add wood to the fire, and other tasks and thought about pulling her aside and pointing it out, then decided not to. The damage was done.

Irritation prickled at her as Castiel tried to get her to talk about her fear. First Jo tried to find out what was wrong and then Castiel asked about her fear. Dean hadn’t tried yet and neither had Sam. Gwen was glad for that. She didn’t _want_ to talk about her feelings or her fear. The sensation of annoyance in Sam’s body was different from when in her own. It was like a slow burn, as if she could shove it down for awhile and let it go until it built up enough force to explode.

That sounded very much like the way Sam seemed when Dean (or someone else) was annoying him. Like he was tamping down the irritation until he couldn’t do it anymore. She’d already done the slight half-suppressed sigh a couple times, and the raised brows and half-eye roll. What was left? The squaring of the jaw before speaking at the next moment of irritation. Gwen thought it’d be soon. Maybe Castiel again. Maybe Jo. Perhaps even Dean. 

Luckily, Balthazar appeared before anyone said anything and he sauntered close. 

“How goes the enlightenment?” Balthazar held his hands out at the flames and wiggled his fingers. “Are you all thoroughly enlightened?”

An annoyed frown appeared on Castiel’s face. It was nice that Gwen wasn’t the only one feeling that way right now. “Is there a reason you’re here and not back in heaven? I specifically told you to clear out your camp with Atropos and go back.”

“The camp is cleared. I came to enjoy the show. Okay, poll time. Who here has the hots for your own body? Show of hands?” His expression was hopeful as he looked at each of them, as if he was hoping for some salacious behavior.

Jo pointed a finger at Dean, who’d begun sliding up the sleeve of her shirt the second Balthazar had appeared. “Do _not_ cut open any part of my arm or hand to get blood for a banishing sigil.”

“How did you know?”

“Kind of transparent, sweetheart. Besides, you banish him, you banish Castiel too.”

He pushed her sleeve back down. “Spoilsport.”

“Leave, Balthazar.” Castiel directed a pointed stare at the other angel.

Balthazar crossed his arms. “You’re no fun. Actually, I came to tell you that the transfer went well and the Satyr is currently enjoying the charms of his lovely nymphs. Well, most of them. Atropos is having a talk with one of them….”

“The busty one?”

“Yes. Apparently she doesn’t trust me, though I can’t think why. I’ve been nothing but --”

“Imagine that.” Dean snorted. “Her not trusting you.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“You’re not supposed to flirt with a woman seriously when you’re in a committed relationship.” He put Jo’s arm around Jo, who smirked, shrugged off the arm and put Dean’s arm around Dean.

“Yeah,” she agreed. “You flirt un-seriously and only for cases or to get good service in restaurants. Good causes like those.”

Dean looked at her and shrugged a brow. “Mmm. I love it when you take charge and lay down the law like this.”

Jo made a playful animal purring-growl that would have sounded fine from her own throat (Gwen had heard her do it before), but from Dean’s was more like a rusty saw. She coughed. “That’s easier in my own body. Your throat just doesn’t quite make that noise right.”

Balthazar stared at them, a disgusted turn to his lips. “Heavens, that’s both disturbing _and_ revolting. More so than you both already are together. This switch has brought out new depths in it.”

“Oh, shut up,” Sam called. “If you pissed Atropos off, it’s your own fault. Don’t pretend you don’t understand why because you know very well why. We all gave you advice, you just don’t want to follow it, so go away. Complain to someone else. Or, here’s an idea, try actually talking to her about your relationship instead of talking to everyone else about it.”

He transferred his attention briefly to Sam, then Gwen, and finally Castiel. “They are ugly like this aren’t they?” 

“Mood swing,” Castiel explained, then glanced at Gwen for confirmation.

She studied Sam a few seconds and nodded. “Definitely another mood swing.”

“Well, I’ll leave you to the mood swings.” He took a few steps, then stopped. “Oh, and Sam? I _have_ talked to her. I talk to her all the time.”

“Oh yeah? About something besides how much you like her breasts?”

He opened his mouth and pointed a finger as if to dispute that, then lowered the finger. “I _will_.”

“You’d better. Somehow, I don’t think having a Fate pissed at you will increase your chances of living a long life. Just tell her what you told me earlier about loving that she’s never the same woman and how there’s always more about her to learn. Tell her you don’t want to change her and you like her for who and what she is.”

“That _is_ good advice,” Dean interjected. “Steer clear of any mention of breasts in that particular talk.”

Sam crossed Gwen’s arms. “Suck it up and do it already and if you want out, don’t sabotage it by flirting with someone else in front of her. Simply tell her. The other will backfire and since she is a Fate, you could find yourself rubbing elbows with Gabriel in wherever you angels go when you die.”

“We return to the cosmic dust that we were formed from.” Castiel shifted in the chair.

“Thank, Castiel. I didn’t know that.”

“You’re welcome, Sam.”

“I don’t think I like any of you,” Balthazar informed them before he disappeared.

“Do you think he’ll actually take any of our advice,” Dean mused.

“No,” Jo answered at the same time Castiel did.

Crossing Sam’s arms, Gwen glanced past Castiel at Sam. He had that glassy-eyed look again and she wondered if it was from Castiel easing the symptoms. Gwen was grateful for that. He didn’t have to do that. She stretched out a hand and touched his coat sleeve. “Thanks. For Sam.”

“You’re welcome. Are you sure you don’t wish to discuss --”

“Positive. Just…let it go.”

“If it’s something I could assist with --”

“It isn’t, okay? It’s all past stuff.”

He peered at her and nodded. “Very well. Then perhaps we could roast marshmallows. I’ve been told that watching them blowup in the fire, char, and drop into the fire is a true camping experience.”

Gwen snorted. “Who told you that?”

“Atropos.” 

“Right. Weren’t you paying attention when we made s’mores earlier?”

“No.”

“Well, it’s better to make s’mores with them.” She raised Sam’s voice. “Hey guys? Castiel just suggested we make s’mores.”

“I didn’t suggest s’mores,” he corrected. “I suggested roasting marshmallows.”

“S’mores are better,” Jo replied, getting up and heading to the food containers. “They have chocolate.”

Castiel reached for the sticks they’d been using earlier, took the marshmallow Jo handed him and fitted it to the stick before lowering the stick to the flames. He looked so serious as he stared at the marshmallow with a glimmer of excitement in his eyes that Gwen bit back a smile. He almost looked like a little kid for a second.

Sam closed Gwen’s eyes and appeared to fall asleep again.

Meanwhile, Dean appeared content to let Jo make the s’mores, his attention lingering on Jo. Yeah, Gwen decided. Jo was definitely going to have that whole ‘you lied’ conversation with Dean later.

The marshmallow Castiel had turned black and plopped into the fire. “That was not as satisfactory as Atropos made it sound. It hardly blew up at all.”

“You want a marshmallow to blow up you use the microwave.” Jo handed Dean a plate with two s’mores on it. “Come by the house later and I’ll show you, but only if you clean up the mess.”

He set the stick against the table. “I’ll be there. Sometime this week?”

“Sure.”

“Excellent. I’ve never seen a marshmallow explode before. I look forward to it.” He glanced at the path. “You will all be yourselves in a few hours. I promise. No after troubles.” He made a gesture at the trees. “I’ll be around if you need me. You may sleep without fear. I’ll keep watch.”

Gwen felt a little better knowing he’d be watching over their camp.

~~~~~~~~~~

It wasn’t long after the s’mores that Jo went into the tent to go to bed. Dean waited awhile, then left Gwen to convince Sam to go to bed and count the hours down until switchback. Sam’s body probably wouldn’t need rest until after the switch occurred.

Poor Gwen, he thought. Whatever her problem with this was wasn’t getting easier as time passed. He got up. “Turning in. Catch you in the morning.”

“Good night.”

He climbed in to the tent, an easier task in Jo’s somewhat smaller body.

“Your back is hurting,” Jo murmured as Dean closed the flap. She’d laid his body flat on the half-deflated mattress and was staring up at the tent ceiling.

“Roll over,” he told her, making sure the flap was secure. “Pull the shirt off.”

There was a moment of hesitation before she did and stretched out.

This was definitely surreal, he decided as he used Jo’s hands to massage the ache away. He knew exactly where to focus his attention.

As he worked, a soft groan sounded, Jo sighing. “That feels good.”

He wondered if he really sounded like that, voice a sensual velvet sound. Dean ran one hand flat along his back. Jo’s heartbeat had quickened at the groan and he stopped the massage, trying to analyze the reaction. It wasn’t a sexual feeling exactly, not like that wave of desire he’d had earlier. This was more like a burst of love and affection.

Jo sat up, tugging the shirt back on before lying on his back. She smiled, stretching out a hand and sliding it through her hair. The pleasant sensation made Dean shiver. “You need to brush my hair.”

“Do I?” It hadn’t occurred to him to do that yet. He wasn’t used to having hair like this.

“You do. Long hair needs care. I’ll braid it unless you think you can.”

The burst sharpened and he laid her body down beside his, moving close and grasping his own hand. He placed it on Jo’s waist and touched his face with her fingertips. The stubble on his jaw tickled her fingertips. “Does the stubble hurt at all?”

“Have I ever complained about it?”

He didn’t recall her doing so. “Not that I remember.” He leaned closer, gaze on hers, fascinated at how he seemed to be able to see her in his eyes. Was it because he was looking for her there? He felt his hand move, slipping along Jo’s waist, her shirt riding up and bare skin touching bare skin. The caress was soft and he thought she’d done it deliberately. He shivered again. Was this how she always felt when he touched her? “Do I always make you shiver when I touch you,” he asked.

“Pretty much,” she admitted.

He explored his features with her fingertips.

“Sweetheart, what are you doing?” There was a bare sliver of amusement in his eyes. Jo knew very well what he was doing and he had the sudden impression that she’d been a short while from doing something similar herself.

“I’m ignoring the weird,” he told her, and moved even closer, brushing their cheeks together. The stubble didn’t hurt, though it was bristly, more of a pleasant roughness than a pain. He drew back a fraction. “I can see you in my eyes. It’s the strangest thing. I can actually see you there. You’re like this…gleam of feminine softness. Can you see me in your eyes?”

“Yes. I can’t explain really what I’m seeing, just that I know it’s you.”

He made a split-second decision. “Close my eyes. I want to try something.”

His smirk appeared, “Those last words get us into trouble frequently,” but she complied.

Before Dean could change his mind, he pressed her lips to his.

As kisses went, it was hardly what he’s been expecting. Most definitely odd. He ignored the weird, like he’d told Jo he was doing and changed angles, trying another kiss. Then another. And another. And yet another until he’d exhausted all possible angles and pressures.

Truthfully, Dean would have liked to say that it didn’t bother him and it wasn’t sort of bizarre. He’d like to claim that he totally got into it, but Jo was right. There was weird and then there was _weird_ , and this was certainly the worst of the latter sort. If he’d had no idea they were only a few hours from being back in their own bodies, maybe he would have persevered until the weirdness went away. Surely it _would_ go away if enough time passed? As it was, the situation exhausted even _his_ sense of sexual adventure in a short time period and that was saying a lot.

Kissing her in his body while being in her body felt too wrong to enjoy properly. He pulled back and licked her lips. She opened his eyes and that smug amused expression sparked a glimmer of irritation in Jo’s body. “Do not say I told you so.”

“Would I do that?” Even the innocent tone grated.

“Yes. You’re right, okay? This is a little too off the charts on the bizarre scale for me.” While he would have chuckled, Jo made it sound like a giggle and he, in turn, laughed at that. “Jo, don’t giggle in my body.”

“I can’t help it. I’m a girl in here, okay?”

“And tomorrow, when we get back home, and after this has worn off, I’m thoroughly exploring your girliness.”

She pulled him close and whispered. “Tell me more. Just how do you plan on exploring it?”

“Well first, I’m going to…” He obliged her with a full accounting.

~~~~~~~~~~

Gwen stared at the fire, willing Sam’s body to feel sleepy. Unfortunately, it didn’t cooperate and she realized she was actually starting to feel more awake than ever. She’d probably still be awake when the switch back occurred unless it came with a sleeping spell like before.

She put Sam’s hands in his jacket pockets. Dean and Jo had gone to bed not long before she’d gotten Sam into the other tent. For awhile she’d been able to hear the sound of their voices and giggles from Jo that had sounded bizarre in Dean’s low tone. Now, there was silence from their tent and Gwen was left alone with the sounds of nature.

She leaned her head back and peered through the leaves up at the sky.

Sam’s height was giving her fits and being the first to have to use the pee pit in this condition was not something she’d been too happy about. Though she had to admit that being able to write her name in pee had been a strangely giddy experience. Everything else though…. She felt too tall and unable to control his body properly, out of place, not liking anything about this experience at all.

Jo was liking seeing things how Dean did. The insight into his eating habits alone had probably helped their relationship tremendously. Now that Jo knew why he didn’t like vegetables, she could allow for that. 

Dean was enjoying that he had breasts and could look down and see cleavage if he stretched the neckline of Jo’s shirt out more. Gwen thought if they had more time like this and were back at the house, he’d likely take it further and really get to know Jo’s body -- with Jo’s permission. Gwen could practically hear Jo telling Dean to ‘knock himself out’.

Even Sam was liking the little bit of understanding he was getting. He’d mentioned something to that effect when she’d put him to bed in the tent, murmuring that he was glad he knew what she felt at these times.

As far as Gwen was concerned, this could be wiped from her memory when it was over. Too bad Castiel would never go for doing that. Maybe Balthazar would, but who really wanted to give Balthazar access to their brain? Not her. 

They were all curious about her discomfort with this. Dean had given her a couple of funny looks, but no way was she going to admit to anyone except perhaps Sam that this right here was her fear. Not just any fear, but rather her big, heart-attack inducing, palm sweating, irrational fear. They all had a fear. Jo had snakes, Dean flying, and Sam clowns. Gwen? She had this. Gender soul switching. Sort of anyway. Her fear wasn’t this exact thing, but rather an off-shoot of it.

Gwen Campbell Winchester was afraid of suddenly being turned into a man physically. It wasn’t rational, was sort of stupid, and she had Christian to thank for her fear. What a prize of a cousin he’d been, especially during her formative years.

Rationally, she knew it’d be over soon and they’d go home with no ill effects for any of them. Castiel had assured them of that a couple times. She knew she should be as fascinated by this look into men like Jo was. However, she couldn’t force herself to be. No way, no how. It was all she could do to pretend everything was fine and she was okay when really, she was walking the edge of panic. She’d even contemplated asking Castiel to make her sleep until the switch was over. He wouldn’t do it, of course, any more than he would wipe her memory because it wasn’t necessary. He was careful these days about the sort of angel-powered things he took care of.

The skunk approached, nuzzled Sam’s legs and tapped at one leg with a paw. Gwen turned her attention to it, leaning over to pet it. Had Atropos been pulling a joke on Castiel with the intent of him being sprayed by a skunk? Since she was hanging out with Balthazar on a regular basis, Gwen sort of assumed that could be the case. Still, maybe she hadn’t been joking. Maybe the skunk really was a woman who’d been cursed. Witches were nasty, even Heather had displayed nasty behavior, and there was a precedent in folklore for that sort of thing.

Thoughtful, she picked up the skunk and settled it on Sam’s lap. “Don’t spray me, okay?” With a gentle touch, she smoothed a hand along it’s back. Intelligent eyes looked up at her and she’d swear she could almost see a woman looking back at her and not an animal. “How did Jack know? How did a little boy not even four figure out you were more than a skunk?”

There was rustling at the tent she and Sam shared and Sam came from the tent. He approached. “Who are you talking to?”

“The skunk. Feeling any better?”

“Surprisingly, yes. Now I’m not tired.”

“Join the club. Your body is wide awake. I couldn’t sleep if I tried.”

“I know. Sorry. I know you’d rather be sleeping through this.” Gwen saw curiosity in her own eyes, but Sam didn’t ask. She knew he was working on figuring out her reaction and had a good chance of doing so. After all, he’d known Christian and knew a lot about her childhood. All she’d have to say was Christian and he’d understand completely.

“I’ll keep you company out here.” He brought one chair close and laid Gwen’s arm across the back of her chair. Sam reached over and petted the skunk. “We should find out more details from Atropos about her.”

“If it’s not a joke on Cas.”

“I don’t think it is. Atropos doesn’t seem the type to do that kind of joke on anyone. I think she’s more the ‘semi-fatal joke because he can heal from it’ type. Things only a being like her would consider funny. The other is more like something Dean would do in one of his more childish moments.”

“True. So, assume it’s true until proven otherwise?”

“Probably the best bet.”

“Should we trap her to keep her safe until we can take care of the witch that did this to her?”

“We’ll keep an eye on her, talk to Cas in the morning, see if he can get information from Atropos.”

“I’d put the witch somewhere in maybe a fifty mile radius. Maybe even less. I’d assume she’d want the woman to be close enough to see her win.”

“Never know though. If nothing else, maybe we can call Heather, see if she has any advice or ideas.”

They discussed it a bit longer, then sat still together watching the fire as night deepened around them.


	13. Chapter 13

Sam woke at dawn, relieved in a second to realize he was back in his own body. He had a crick in his neck from falling asleep in the folding chair and his left foot was so asleep that he couldn’t tell it was there until he moved it and it started tingling. The tingle escalated into pain and he gritted his teeth. Raising his right hand, he rubbed at his neck, attempting to relieve the crick.

“Hey.” Gwen came from the path to the pee pit, looking positively chipper. More so than she usually did in the morning. She came to him and brushed his hand aside. “Let me.”

He relaxed against her touch. “You look better this morning.”

“I feel better.” She kept her voice low. “You fell asleep right before the switch. It was a bizarre sensation, like I zoomed out of your body, was in the air a few seconds, then dove back into my own. Had no trouble falling asleep after that. You didn’t even wake up.”

“Your body crashed last night.”

“The Pamprin does that.” She worked on his neck for a few minutes, Sam pondering her mood and the previous evening.

As she stepped away, with a last caress to the back of his neck, it was like a light bulb flickered on in Sam’s head, the pieces of Gwen’s expressions and attitude fitting together. He hadn’t seen just discomfort, he’d seen real fear that she’d tried and almost succeeded in hiding. “You’re afraid of the whole gender soul switch thing. It’s not anything like snakes, flying, or clowns that gets to you. It’s that, what we went through last night, isn’t it? You’re afraid of something that rarely happens to most people.”

She swallowed hard and pulled her jacket tighter around herself, stepping around to where he could see her face. Gwen cast a glance at Dean and Jo’s tent. “Keep your voice down. Don’t tell Dean, okay?”

“Gwen, the odds of that ever happening again, even to us --”

“I know, but you’ve had a soul switch spell happen twice.”

“The first wasn’t a gender soul switch spell, it was a simple soul switch.”

“Simple? Yeah. Still a switch. I also know that it doesn’t really happen often and probably wouldn’t have happened if we hadn’t come camping. Fears like this are completely irrational and I know that. I understand it. I do, but it still terrifies me. See, when I was about five, Christian --”

He snorted. “Enough said.” Christian had alternately been Gwen’s favorite relative and her most hated over the years. They’d had quite the love-hate relationship that had largely depended on how much of an ass he was being at one time. His normal mode was ‘ass’.

“He was supposed to tell me bedtime stories while mom and dad were busy working on a case file and he hated to, so he kept telling me this story about an annoying little girl who woke up as a boy. He told it like a horror story, made it terrible. It was obvious even then at that age that the annoying little girl in his story was supposed to be me. I had nightmares for _weeks_ that I woke up as a boy. I know now he was just mad that he wasn’t allowed to help with whatever the case was, but Sam, he was _mean_. He had me terrified and for awhile, every time I did anything faintly tomboyish, he’d look me over and tell me it was happening. Dad finally stepped in and Christian got in trouble when they figured out he’d been telling me horror stories as bedtime stories.”

“No wonder Dean couldn’t ever figure out what you were afraid of.” He’d done the rounds of various practical jokes to determine her fear, too. In the process, he’d managed to make both Sam and Jo mad at him by incorporating both clowns and snakes into his pranks. “You’re a complicated woman, Gwen.”

“I guess I am. You won’t say anything?”

“No. Let him think Supergirl isn’t afraid of anything.”

“Thanks.” She reached for the container of coffee. “I’ll get the coffee going.”

~~~~~~~~~~

In the tent, Dean laid still, Jo cradled against him, her head on his chest. They’d fallen asleep that way the night before and he’d found them still in that position upon waking. Raising his head, he pressed a kiss to the top of her head and listened to Sam and Gwen’s quiet conversation outside.

So Gwen was afraid of exactly what had happened and Christian was at the root of it. Dean sighed. That Christian had done that to Gwen saddened him. Occasionally, he still wished he could strangle the man.

Jo stirred, shifting against him, her hand sliding across his chest. She made a little moan and said, “I’m a girl again,” in a voice husky from sleep.

“I see that,” he said back at her, sliding the fingers of one hand across her cheek as she looked up at him. “About Gwen,” he started, then stopped. If she wanted Jo to know, she’d tell her, not to mention he wasn’t supposed to know. Both Sam and Gwen thought they were asleep. 

Right then, Dean decided to keep it to himself. If there ever came a point where they all needed to be aware of her fear for safety, he’d encourage her to admit it. It was okay with him if Supergirl pretended she had no fears.

Jo raised up onto her elbow. “What about her?”

“Nothing really. Just wondering if you think she’s okay this morning. She didn’t really take to being Sam.”

“A shame, too. I kind of liked being you for a few hours. I’d have thought she’d be curious what Sam can do.” She sat up completely. “Still, I’m glad to be myself again.”

“Me, too. What’s say we get up, freshen up, have some breakfast, and start breaking camp?”

“Count me in.”

Dean emerged from the tent to find Gwen pouring coffee and the skunk curled up at Sam’s feet. “You okay today,” he asked Gwen.

“Just peachy,” she replied, holding a cup out to him.

He took the cup and studied her a moment, then gestured towards Sam. “Why don’t you let me get breakfast?”

“It’s my turn.”

“Screw the turns. Go relax.”

She was suspicious, he could see it from her half frown, but took her own coffee over to the chair beside Sam and sat. “You want to cook again, I’ll let you.”

He got started.

~~~~~~~~~~

“You’re a complicated female, Atropos.” Balthazar carefully appeared so only Atropos could see him and not the woman she was preparing to create an accident for. He’d been hesitant to follow advice from Dean and Sam, but since it actually made some sort of sense, he’d decided to try it a little.

She didn’t even glance his way. “You’re just now figuring that out? You _are_ a genius.” Striding across the small room, she checked her clipboard, pursed her lips, and moved a small knife. “Why are you here?”

“I’ve said before that I love to watch you work.” It was true. He enjoyed seeing how focused she was on her particular task, a take-charge female. She moved several other items, making it very easy for the witch to turn, slip, trip, seem to catch herself and fall, taking down the bookshelves she kept her tools and references on, including several deadly objects that would ultimately be her death. Imagination and brains, that was his Atropos. He really did enjoy this.

“There.” She stepped back. “Stay back and…watch.”

Time resumed it’s march forward. The woman completed her task at the table and then the scene played out exactly as Atropos had planned it, ending in a bloody and thoroughly gruesome death.

Atropos smiled and turned to face him. “There. Now, what was it you really wanted?”

“You have time?”

“I’ll make time if it’s important. Is it important?” Her brows rose.

He almost chickened out, then had the image in his thoughts of Dean and Sam smirking, then Jo, Gwen, Castiel, Abigael, and even Uzziel and Jael smirking at him as well. That image morphed into the entirety of heaven itself smirking at him, including Death. “Yes, I believe it is. It’s about…us.”

“What about us?” Her voice was cautious and she crossed her arms.

His vessel’s heart beat fast. A sign of nervousness? Of fear? “Atropos, I can’t imagine not being with you. You fascinate me and I’m not sure if my feelings are love or not. I merely know that I don’t want you to ever change being who and what you are. I want you like this.”

“You flirted with a nymph.”

“I flirt with everyone and nymphs flirt with everyone as well. She was flirting with you as I recall. As for me, ask Castiel. I always have flirted. It’s how I am. You knew that.”

“Yes, I did, but even Dean Winchester knew when to change that part of himself.”

“He still flirts.” Yet there _was_ a difference in it now, as Jo had made clear. Dean kept his serious efforts for Jo only.

“But he made sure his wife was secure in their relationship and that she remains secure. You don’t do that, Balthazar. You make me feel insecure and I don’t like that.”

“How can I fix that? Tell me. What can I do to make you feel secure?” He stepped closer to her, studying her face. He found that he wanted to give her the security in their relationship that she was craving.

“Stop flirting with nymphs would be a good start.”

“Done. I’ll restrain myself.”

One brow raised. “Balthazar.”

“I’ll attempt to restrain myself,” he amended. “If Dean Winchester can do it, surely I can. I am an angel after all.” His smile was tentative as he waited for her reply.

She was silent for several minutes, her scrutiny almost enough to make him squirm. “It’s a start. Let’s go have coffee and talk some more.”

It turned out that taking advice from Sam and Dean Winchester _could_ be a good idea after all. Who knew?

~~~~~~~~~~

Sam watched Jo pet the skunk. Ever since she’d gotten up, she’d been paying close attention to it.

“Do you think Atropos was pulling Castiel’s leg,” she asked. “I mean, it seems strange to curse a rival to be a skunk of all things.” She gently scratched under it’s chin. The skunk laid it’s chin in her palm. “Why a skunk?”

“It’s not really strange.” Sam thought about it a second. “Lore is full of stories like that. The Greek, Roman, and Norse gods were always turning people into animals for one reason or another. I’m sure if you cornered Heather she could find a spell for it pretty easily. In fact --”

The air beside Jo shimmered and where there had been a skunk a second earlier was a naked woman with her chin still on Jo’s hand.

Gwen spit coffee out and Dean paused in eating his breakfast.

The woman was young, perhaps in her twenties, with long dark hair and pale skin. She gasped in a breath, opened her eyes, and stared at all of them. “C-c-cold….” she whispered.

Gwen was the first to move, taking off her jacket and draping it around the woman. Sam went into their tent, returning with a blanket that Jo and Gwen wrapped around her.

“I guess the answer is ‘no’. Atropos wasn’t pulling Castiel’s leg.” Dean set his plate aside. “Welcome back to the human world. I think you’re free to go home now.”

“Did she stop the spell? Did the witch end it?” The girl pulled the blanket tighter to her. “What happened?”

“We’re not sure,” Jo replied. “Gwen, she looks about your size. Do you have anything she could wear?”

“I’ll look. I might have a pair of clean sweats and t-shirt still.” She went into the tent.

“Either the spell was removed by the witch herself or….” Sam leaned forward in his chair, very glad that Atropos hadn’t been joking. He hadn’t relished the idea of trapping the skunk and starting an investigation only to potentially discover it really was a skunk.

“Or what?” The girl swallowed hard, her dark eyes going to each of them in turn. “Is Tom dead? Did she kill him?”

Dean poured a cup of coffee and handed it to her. “Or the witch died. Most witches we’ve met are spiteful, skeevy liars. They’d never end a spell just because the person they were fighting over died. I’m betting Tom is fine. I’m Dean, by the way. That’s Sam,” he pointed, “Jo, and Gwen’s the one finding you clothes.”

“Evelyn. Evelyn Carson.”

“We’ll get you some food, clothes, and take you into town.” He began to dish up food for her.

“How much do you remember from being a skunk,” Sam asked. He found it interesting that she didn’t ask how they knew about witches.

Evelyn sipped at the cup. “Images, mostly. Scents. Fear. A little boy talking to me in a kind voice.” She smiled. “He was very sweet. Comforting.”

“Could you understand him?” Jo adjusted the blanket around Evelyn.

“Yes. I could understand all of you. I _was_ human underneath it.”

“Of course,” Sam soothed. The question of why she didn’t ask how they knew about witches was answered then. “Sorry for that question. We don’t have much experience in people who’ve been be-spelled to be animals.” 

“It’s okay. You can’t imagine what it’s like to be trapped inside a small animal. Especially a skunk of all things. People have a tendency to scream and throw things at you.”

She lapsed into silence and Gwen opened the tent flap.

“I set some clothes out on the sleeping bag.”

An hour later, when Evelyn felt strong enough to travel, Gwen and Sam took her into town. It turned out that she hadn’t strayed far from the town she’d lived in, staying close by in the woods. They dropped her off at the police station, Gwen rolling down the window on the passenger side.

“Be careful, Evelyn. Might not be the same world you left.”

“I know. A year is a long time for anyone. I’m just glad to be human again.” Evelyn pressed her hands to the door. “Thank you. I can’t say it enough. Are you sure you won’t come in with me?”

  
“Probably best we don’t,” Sam told her.

With a nod, she moved towards the building. She’d told them of her plan to say she’d been kidnapped, claim she didn’t know why or where she’d been held for the past year, and say she’d been blindfolded and tied, then driven out to the woods and released. No way was she going to mention witches and magic.

“Think she’ll be able to pick up the pieces,” Gwen asked as Sam pulled out of the parking lot and onto the street.

“Make a note of the town. We’ll check the papers and internet this week, see what turns up, what the story was.” He’d been surprised once to find out that Ellen did that regularly. She’d do a check after the fact to see what the media had to say about the fallout from cases. Sometimes it was good, sometimes bad. “I’m sort of glad we didn’t have to do anything with this one.”

“Witches are definitely not our favorite things.”

Understatement of the year.

~~~~~~~~~~

From above, Castiel observed the Winchester family taking care of the skunk turned woman and was relieved to note that Atropos had not, in fact, been playing any sort of tasteless prank. He waited until all were back at the camp before he reappeared.

“Good morning. You’re all back where you belong.” He looked at Dean and before he could ask, said, “The baby is still in perfect health. Your time as Jo didn’t hurt the…child.” Once more, he had to fumble not to give the sex away. At the rate he was going, _he_ was going to be the one to spoil that for them before the birth.

Jo patted her stomach with a small amused grin. “And I’m having no morning sickness.”

“Yes. That’s good news, Jo.”

“Hell yeah it is,” Dean said. “Hey, can I ask you something, Cas?”

“Yes, of course.”

“How did Jack know? About the woman in the skunk, I mean.”

Castiel frowned, studying first Dean, then Jo. “You don’t know?”

“Know what,” Jo asked.

“It wasn’t that he knew the skunk was a woman. He felt her emotional distress. Your son has the gift of empathy. He is able to identify with what others are feeling. The gift is currently developing and will mature fully by the time he’s an adult. There will be some trial and error while he develops his gift. I’d expect him to bring many wounded animals home as he grows, along with emotionally wounded humans.”

“Empathy,” Dean repeated. “Are you serious?”

“Yes. Have you not noticed that he seems to know when you all need affection and care?”

Jo crossed her arms. “Well, he _does_ always seem to know when I want a hug. And he did keep cuddling up to Gwen those three weeks she had post-partum depression. That what you mean?”

“He did,” Gwen interjected. “He’d climb up with me and tell me it’d be okay. And he’s always been good with Sean.”

Castiel nodded. “His gift obviously extends to those who’ve been bewitched into animal forms as well as standard humans.”

“He _was_ pretty affectionate with the skunk woman.” Sam put his hands in his pockets. “Named her and everything. Kitty Two.”

He could see that Dean didn’t quite believe him. 

“Empathy, Cas? Really?”

“Why is that such a stretch for you to believe? You and Jo both have a touch of it yourselves. It’s both a Winchester and Harvelle trait. It’ll lead to him being very good with those victims of supernatural trauma. Or of any trauma. Empathy is a gift that has been disappearing from this world in the past several generations. I’d be pleased he’s been given it. He’ll need it in the future.” Castiel took a step further into the camp. 

“Awesome.” Dean looked at Jo. “That’s awesome, isn’t it, Jo?”

“Yup.”

“I didn’t come to discuss Jack’s gift however. I have a present for all of you.” Castiel gestured in the air. “I’ve brought with me a small company of angels from the fifth battalion. You can’t see them, but they’re here. They’re a fine group of angels and will be pleased to stand guard while you fish for a few hours and while Jo finishes her book.” He leaned forward slightly. “None of them have any desire to fish or bother you. I questioned each one myself. They all could care less about fishing and reading horror novels. They’ll make sure nothing else interrupts your vacation.”

“You….” Dean blinked. “You brought angels to guard us so we can fish?” A tiny pleased glint began to grow in Dean’s eyes.

“And so Jo can read her book. We angels interrupted your vacation and I should have told Uzziel ‘no’. I apologize for that. I should know better by now that his ideas can be troublesome for others. We’ll create a protective circle about all of you.”

“You’re making it up to us,” Sam asked, brows raising and amusement playing about in his eyes.

“Yes. It’s what friends do for each other.” He shrugged. “We are friends. Our friendship isn’t the standard human definition, but it is a friendship.”

“You didn’t have to --” Gwen started, but Dean interrupted her, already heading for the fishing supplies.

“Yes, he did. You’re awesome, Cas. Grab your gear, let’s go. Jo, enjoy your book.”

In minutes, Castiel was standing alone in the camp beside Jo. Well, not alone really. He could see the members of the company who’d been assigned to stay with Jo were amused by this. Jo couldn’t see them, or their grins. “I hope your book is good.”

Jo raised a hand and patted his back with it. “Thank you. This was a nice gesture.”

“I feel responsible for Uzziel’s idea since I did have the opportunity to nip it in the bud and didn’t.”

“Well, I suppose I should go read while I can.”

He watched Jo go into the tent, gave a few final orders to the angels staying with her, then smiled to himself and went to watch Dean, Sam, and Gwen fish. 


	14. Chapter 14

Jo was double checking that they hadn’t left anything where their tent had been when Dean returned from the Impala and cleared his throat.

“So, Jo…. You and camping.” Dean crossed his arms.

She straightened and looked at him. No way she was getting around this talk was there? “What about it?”

“You and camping,” he repeated. “I remember you saying you can’t camp and yet I saw you, in my body, doing camping things and being pretty competent at them.” The expression on his face indicated she’d better have a good explanation. It was the same look he used on Jack…and Sam, Gwen, and everyone else.

“I don’t remember saying that.”

“Uh…I do. You said --”

“I never said I _couldn’t_ camp,” Jo said with a tiny smile. “Couldn’t wasn’t the word I used. I said I don’t _like_ camping and I _don’t_ camp. I never said anything about not being able to. That was all your assumption.” She crossed her arms, a mirror pose to his.

“I thought you couldn’t do any of this. The fishing, cooking over a fire….”

“Dean. Sweetheart. My mother sent me to as many summer camps as she could every summer and forced me to be a Girl Scout so I’d learn stuff. She called them useful experiences. I called them a waste of my free time. I hated the other kids, except the occasional hunters kid who showed up at Camp Indian name something something.”

“Camp Indian name something something?” His brows rose. He didn’t seem especially upset by her explanation that he’d misunderstood her word choice.

“They all have fake Indian names and when you point out that the fake name means something like bear pissing in the woods you get the camp version of the brig and don’t have to go to the stupid dance. They all had a stupid dance.”

“You were such a joiner.”

She laughed and nodded. “What can I say? I was a social butterfly.”

“Not.”

“Anyway, point is, I can camp. I just really hate to and avoid it with a passion.”

His tongue slipped out, wetting his lips. His glance turned to Gwen and back to Jo. “Did Gwen know?”

“Hell yeah. We had to camp once on a case. I made my feelings about that clear. She thought it was funny.”

“I don’t remember you two camping.”

She started towards the Impala. “It was a stupid case, not even one really. We were trying to disprove some pictures that surfaced of a Yeti and to do so, we had to camp.”

“And it rained. Oh, how it rained. Jo was miserable and grumpy.” Gwen looked up from packing the SUV. “But we did disprove the pictures. It was a hoax.” 

“Of course it was,” Sam said with a snort as he shifted things in the backseat. “Bigfoot and Yeti don’t exist. Hunters for centuries have been looking for evidence that they’re something besides man made hoaxes and have found nothing.”

Dean tossed the tent pegs into the trunk.

Gwen leaned against the SUV with a sigh. “So tell me, why is it all our vacations end in disaster or a case of some kind?”

Sam and Dean looked at each other. “Winchester curse,” they replied in unison and Dean closed the trunk of the Impala.

“Okay. So, the next time we take a vacation, we don’t call it a vacation because, as far as vacations go, this one sucked big time.”

“No kidding.” Sam shut the back driver door on the SUV. “I think this is our worst trip yet.”

“There’s some pretty stiff competition from some of our past outings, but I think I might agree with you, Sam.” Dean gestured at the SUV. “You get the cooler Cas brought?”

“Yeah.”

Jo started laughing and they all stopped to look at her. “Listen to you three. Worst trip ever? Please. This hardly compares to past outings, namely my high school reunion. _That_ was the worst trip ever. Half my graduating class died, a chunk of the building was damaged in the fight, I got a broken arm, we lost Castiel as a friend for months, and we got shackled with Heather. This?” She swirled a finger about in the air. “Hardly compares to that and not every vacation has sucked. Gwen, you and Sam took a honeymoon and nothing happened.”

“That we know of,” Gwen muttered. “Those three girls were sort of creepy. They could have been some weird monster of some kind.”

“Not exactly true, Jo.” Crossing his arms, Sam leaned against the SUV. “I found some weather patterns on the way which did eventually pan out into a case.”

“But it didn’t happen to you both. You had an awesome honeymoon. I had a supposed spa trip that was actually my mother conning me into helping her watch out for Bobby and then turned out to be a real case of a crossroad demon and a black eyes taking over a nursing home and luring Bobby there with the intent of killing him.”

Gwen jabbed a finger at her. “Ha! I knew you were lying about falling while running the obstacle course!”

Jo cast a sheepish glance at Dean, who returned it. She’d forgotten they hadn’t exactly ‘fessed up that they’d been out on a case while Sam and Gwen had been on their honeymoon.

“And,” Sam asked. “What’s your point, Jo?”

“I had a great time the past few days. This was the best camping trip ever for me. Castiel and Abigael had that whole Inspector Closeau and Cato attack sort of thing going on that one afternoon, we all got to give relationship advice to Balthazar, Jack got over his fear of ants, and we learned the skunk was really a woman cursed. The whole group of angels provided some welcome comic relief.”

“We got hit by a gender soul switch spell from a Satyr,” Dean reminded her.

“Uh-huh. Like you didn’t enjoy that peak into what it’s like to be a woman. I know you did, Dean. Besides, it only lasted a few hours.”

“Twelve hours.” Gwen joined Sam at the side of the SUV. “Twelve hours of being a guy.” 

Her tone was slightly off, yet Jo couldn’t figure out how it was off. She shrugged. “It wasn’t twelve hours. It was more like four because the spell knocked us out for four and we went to bed after about four awake.”

“No, you went to bed then. I was awake. Sam’s body didn’t want to go to sleep. It was twelve,” Gwen insisted. There was an odd, almost panicky gleam to her gaze.

“No, it was --”

“Twelve. Twelve hours.”

Sam stepped behind Gwen and made a waving motion across his throat, an indication for Jo to stop immediately.

She frowned. “I think you’re overreacting a little here, Gwen. We weren’t even conscious for --”

“Overreacting?”

Jo heard Dean suck in a breath beside her and he grasped her arm, saying in a low, soothing voice, “Okay, Let’s all calm down. I think we should --”

“Overreacting,” Gwen repeated, shaking her head “It’s not overreacting when that’s your fear, Jo! It’s sheer hell! An hour like that is hell! It’s --” Gwen’s eyes widened and she gasped in a breath, covering her mouth with both hands.

“All out in the open now,” Sam finished for her, placing his hands on her shoulders.

Jo blinked, thinking over that statement in regards to Gwen’s behavior those hours. “Oh. That explains it.”

Crossing her arms, Gwen hunched her shoulders. “That’s it, okay? Get the teasing out of the way. Come on.” She was obviously expecting Dean to start in and when he didn’t, Gwen looked over at him. “Well? Get it over with, Dean.”

He sighed. “You all do know I don’t always make tasteless jokes, right? I _can_ restrain myself and I think I know when not to tease you three on things. You get a pass on this one. I’ve got other things to tease you about, Gwen. I don’t need the fear Christian put in you when you were a kid. He was a dick to do that and we all know it.”

“It’s Christian’s fault?” Jo wasn’t surprised. From the stories she’d heard, Christian hadn’t been a particularly decent sort of guy even in the best of times.

“It was, but, Jo, those hours weren't my idea of fun either.” Sam wrapped his arms around Gwen.

“You’re just upset you had to deal with cramps. If that hadn’t been going on, you would have been having as much fun as Dean did after the morning sickness went away. I had fun. It was fun being Dean for a few hours and the next time we go camping, we’re definitely inviting the angels to come along.”

“No,” all three said in unison, almost identical alarmed expressions on their faces.

Really, she didn’t think the angels had been that bad. She’d been sort of kidding about inviting them, but seeing that reaction gave her an idea. 

“No angels, no camping.” Sam stepped beside Gwen and made an emphatic gesture with his hands.

“Oh, come on, guys,” she coaxed. “We can give camping lessons.”

The suggestion, that Jo even managed not to smirk through, made Sam shudder. “No. Bad idea, Jo.”

“Agreed. I’m all for camping, but I think it’s just asking for a disaster that we don’t need.” Dean put his arm around her. “Still, I’m glad you finally had fun on a camping trip, Jo.”

“What about the fishing,” she asked, looking up at him and batting her lashes. “Wasn’t that fun?”

Dean pursed his lips. “The fishing was okay. Nice of Cas to do that.” His hand slid down her arm and back up. “Let’s hit the road.”

Jo climbed in the passenger seat, put on her seatbelt, and braced herself for the inevitable lurch of the car when Dean decided to pass Sam and lead the way back to Sioux Falls as fast as the Impala could go. He made it a whole two miles on the main road before he floored it and passed Sam and Gwen. She smiled and stared out the window.

A little reverse psychology had just ensured she’d never have to go camping again.

~~~~~~~~~~

The drive to Bobby’s house was blessedly uneventful, to which Dean was glad. Entering the house, they found the remains of a blanket tent camp in one room.

“Grandma put up a tent in the living room,” Jack announced.

“We draped a few blankets over chairs,” Ellen explained, folding a blanket and dropping it on the couch. Bobby’s house was definitely showing a woman’s touch these days. After many arguments, he’d relaxed his bachelor stance and let Ellen pretty much have free reign with the house, which made sense since they were a couple these days. “Grilled some hotdogs, made s’mores in the microwave. He liked watching the marshmallows swell up. Jo’s sort of camping.”

“I enjoyed this trip.” Jo crouched down and zipped Jack’s bag. “Is Mr. Bear in here?”

“Of course.” Ellen raised a brow. “What went wrong on your trip?”

“What do you mean what went wrong?”

“Jo, every time you camp, something happens. A freak snowstorm in July, a hurricane in the Midwest, mutant mosquitoes that require the camp to close so they can spray for them, the canoe you’re in springs a leak in the middle of the lake, you come home needing three rounds of antibiotics for some strange illness that you’re the first in the state to come down with, the tents get shredded by a bear, an army of raccoons gets into the cooking cabin…. That was just one year. Need I go on?”

Dean crossed his arms. “Really? All that happened, Ellen?”

“And more. The stories I could tell….”

“Hey, I tried to tell you all,” Jo protested. “I told you multiple times I hate camping and something always goes wrong, but no, you didn’t believe me.”

“We had some mishaps,” Gwen admitted. “Jack found a skunk that followed him around all the time and it turned out to be a woman who was cursed, the angels showed up, a satyr stole our food.”

“It didn’t rain.” Jo smiled.

“True. That’s about the only thing that didn’t happen.” Sam appeared in the doorway.

Gwen finished putting Sean in the carrier. “Was he good for you, Ellen?”

“Little angel. He had a bottle about an hour ago.”

“Where’s Bobby?” Dean picked Jack up.

Ellen waved a hand. “Out with Rufus. They got wind of an Okami out east. Left this morning.” She cleared her throat and put her hands on her hips. “Oh, and Jo? Jack told us that when he gets older, he’ll go to a whorehouse. Care to explain where he heard that?”

Her cheeks reddened. “Not really, no.”

Dean snickered at that.

“You do get that he repeats everything you and Dean say, don’t you?”

Jack grinned at Ellen and giggled.

“Who taught him the Rite of Exorcism? Bobby was tickled when Jack pretended to use it on him and got all the way through it without any mistakes.”

“Wait.” Dean held up a hand, then pointed a finger at his son. “He pretended to exorcise Bobby?”

“Sure. It was darn cute, too. I should have taped it, but didn’t think to until he was done.”

“Did he finger paint symbols anywhere,” Jo asked with a quirk of one brow. She shouldered Jack’s bag.

One of Ellen’s favorite stories was of Jo at about four years of age, a baby doll, and protection symbols painted on the doll. Dean had lost count of the number of times he’d heard that story.

“No, but he’s younger than you were. He’s on the same sort of timetable though.”

“Daddy?” Jack tugged at Dean’s shirt. “Daddy?”

“What?”

“We got Kitty Two?” There was a hopeful gleam to his eyes.

“He seemed to think you’d bring some cat home with you,” Ellen explained. “Said she was lonely. Had these plans about her going in the house and everything. Tried to get me to go to the store and get a pretty dish for her to eat out of.”

“It wasn’t a cat. It was a skunk.” Sam lifted Sean’s bag.

“Only it wasn’t a skunk at all, but a woman cursed to look like a skunk. The one I mentioned a minute ago.” Gwen maneuvered the pacifier into Sean’s mouth and stood, carrier in hand. “We’re heading back to the house. See you back there.” She and Sam left.

Dean shifted Jack a little in his arms. “We couldn’t bring her home, buddy.”

Jack frowned. “Why?”

How did he explain it so he’d understand? “Because we took her to her home.” Not exactly the truth, but close enough.

“She’ll be lonely in the woods.”

Jo stepped over and put a hand on Jack’s back. “No, sweetie, we took her to her real home. Her family was happy to have her back. She won’t be lonely anymore.” Pure speculation and probably true.

Slowly, Jack’s lower lip slid out in a pout and he laid his head on Dean’s shoulder. “Wanted Kitty Two.”

“I’m sure Kitty One missed you,” Dean soothed as Jack buried his face in his shoulder. He could recognize the first signs of a tantrum brewing, probably from all the excitement of the entire weekend. First camping, then being whisked away by Abby to do indoor camping with both Ellen and Bobby. Jack definitely needed some downtime and a long nap. “We’d better get him home, Ellen. Thanks.”

“Anytime. You know I love doing the grandma thing.”

Once home, and greeted by Kitty One, Jack stopped his fussing and let himself be put down for a nap. Dean headed for a shower. As he dressed, he found a file Jo had left open on her dresser. It made for some interesting reading.

Later, with a quick glance at his inbox, Dean sat down at the kitchen table. “So…. Who wants to check the incoming cases with me?”

Jack was still asleep in his room and from the silence, it seemed Sean was napping too.

“Real or front,” Sam asked, as he headed across the room with a full laundry basket.

“Real.”

“Way ahead of you, Batman,” Gwen replied, laying a stack of printouts on the table and sitting across from him. Her hair was half dried and she was in sweats and what looked like one of Sam’s shirts. “I started printing and writing down the messages as soon as we got back.”

“Before actually.” Sam set the basket down and nudged it across the kitchen floor towards the washer and dryer. “She cleared out both our voicemail on the way back and then remote called the machine.”

“Someone’s in a hurry,” Jo said, sliding into the chair beside Dean. “Okay. Let’s get crackin’.”

~~~~~~~~~~

It wasn’t that Gwen was in a hurry to get back to work, it was merely that she’d rather work to forget their so-called vacation. She listed the calls they’d gotten, mostly other hunters wanting assistance, and the usual calls from Heather. 

Heather wanted to know if they’d all like to come up and visit, if Jo and Gwen would like to have a girls weekend somewhere, and if they were making any sort of progress on the latest cases from the files her dad had left. They were all the sort of questions she asked when she was in the mood for a long chat. Gwen had realized months ago that Heather was lonely. For all of her wealth and witchy powers, she didn’t have many friends and had yet to get another boyfriend after calling it quits with her former fiancée. She, like Marissa, wanted them to be her friends.

Jo sighed. “I’ll call her right after I call Marissa. There goes the rest of my day.”

“What are you going to call her,” Dean asked, setting his phone on the table.

“Smartass. I have to get myself out of going to see ‘Route 666’ with Marissa. The whole morning sickness thing got me nowhere. I might just have to bite the bullet and go.”

“No.” Dean shook his head. “You’re not seeing it. I don’t care if you _do_ think Dave has a manly chest.”

Jo had been teasing Dean for weeks about the love scene pictures that had leaked from the set.

“Dean, I read the book. I know what happened. You got naked with an old girlfriend.”

“You still don’t need to see it on a big screen.”

Gwen tuned out the discussion and perused the papers she hadn’t mentioned yet. “Here’s one looks promising,” she interrupted. “Trail of severed penises across two states. The man still alive said the woman bit his off.” With a mischievous purse of her lips, she handed it across the table to Jo, whose brows rose as she read the article.

“Promising? I think your definition and mine are two different things. Sounds like something for the police, not us,” Sam said, wadding up one piece of paper and dumping it into the trashcan.

“Bit his off.” Dean shuddered. “That’s just wrong. Was her name Lorena?”

“Her name isn’t mentioned and yeah, she bit it off.” Jo nodded and tapped the page with one finger. “But not with her mouth.”

“You mean….” Sam’s mouth dropped open.

“With her….” Dean pointed at his lap. “With her…goodies?” He seemed scandalized by that, a stricken expression on his face.

Gwen smothered a grin. “Sex is dangerous.”

“Someone has issues.” Dean shifted uncomfortable in his seat. He and Sam looked at each other and said in unison, “We’ll pass on that one.”

Jo laughed. “Somehow I thought you might.”

Dean picked up a folder and flipped it open. His tone was casual. “So, who here knew Garth’s new girlfriend is Becky?”

“Wait…Becky as in my stalker Becky?” Sam sat back in his chair. “Better him than me. I didn’t know. Gwen?”

“Jo told me,” she admitted and held up another paper. “Ghoul in North Carolina?”

“Jo?”

“I’m on it, Sam, and how did you know, Dean? He never mentions her name.” 

“Same way you did. The mountain range of evidence. You left your surveillance file open on the dresser and I read it while you were in the shower.”

Jo set the penis paper in the stack she and Gwen were considering. “Oh. Well, I’m carefully monitoring the situation. Why don’t we pass the ghoul on to Mel or Shawn? They were both in that general area last week.”

“I second that vote. Mel needs the practice and so does Shawn and what do you mean you’re on it? What’s that mean?” Dean flipped a page in the file in front of him. “Why are you wasting ink printing out screenshots anyway? Don’t we have better things to print than pictures of Becky and Garth looking like they’re at a high school theme dance?”

Reading across the table, Gwen realized Dean had brought down the file Jo had been keeping on Becky.

“That’s just so I don’t have to go back through the sites later and ‘on it’ means that if Becky can use the powers of fandom for evil, like stalking Sam, then I can tap it for good. I’ll stalk her and by extension Garth and make sure everything stays ok. Don’t worry, sweetheart. If I have my way, and I will, she’ll never know Garth is a hunter and that he knows us.”

“How are you going to manage that?”

She grinned. “Hey, he still thinks I’m flirting with him on the phone. I can get him to agree to never tell her.”

Dean held up a screenshot. “Seriously?” It was a picture of Garth and Becky, the sort of cutesy picture a lovesick teen girl might Photoshop, with a frame and hearts along the edges. The caption read, ‘My sexy, romantic cowboy’. “Cowboy? She thinks he’s a cowboy? Is she blind?”

“She thinks he’s involved in rodeos and love is sort of blind, you know.” Jo snagged the file and pulled out another printout. “That’s where they met, actually. At a rodeo convention. He was finishing up an investigation and there she was.”

“Well, I say good for them.” Gwen laid the papers down on the table. “The sooner she falls for some guy and forgets Sam, the better.”

“You know she’ll never forget me, right? She’ll always be there hovering in the background.” Sam snagged the picture from Dean, set it on the file and closed the flap. “Enough of Becky. Jo, do what you have to and if you need backup with Garth --”

“I’ll have Dean give him a gentle talking to.”

Gwen chuckled at Dean’s expression. The gentle talking to might just include a smack upside the head. “So, are we set?”

Dean’s features relaxed and he leaned back in his chair and nodded. “You two go out this week. Sam and I will work the front cases, make some callbacks, and work on research.”

As Gwen packed, she reflected on what both Dean and Sam had called the luck with their vacations: the Winchester Curse. She’d been the one to suggest they shouldn’t call their vacations vacations, but her natural optimism was rising up now that a few hours had passed. Aside from the soul switch and some of the angel antics, it hadn’t been too bad of a vacation really. Uzziel and Jael had been kind of cute and Balthazar’s trouble with Atropos amusing. Not to mention it had been interesting to see Castiel in his capacity as manager of the Guardians. 

And Jo had been right. The honeymoon Gwen and Sam had taken hadn’t been a complete disaster. It had gone rather well. They’d enjoyed themselves. 

They were all overreacting about the camping trip. 

Maybe they could all try again.

Stepping to the dresser, she pulled out a brochure that had come in the mail. Maybe they could all take a family trip to some place like Disneyland. Calling it a trip wasn’t the same as calling it a vacation. 

Was it?

Seriously. What could possibly go wrong at Disneyland?


End file.
